(Source: The Movie "The Princess Diaries")
"The princess learns the Fa, but she can't learn it."
Recently, a "princess learning method" that uses role-play to improve work-study efficiency and interpersonal skills has become popular on the Internet.
The so-called "princess learning method" is to look at the princess and "arm" herself from top to bottom, from the inside out: exquisite makeup, decent appearance, peace of mind, from life and rest to self-cultivation, everything is required according to the standards of the royal princess.
Specific requirements for the "Princess Learning Method" of online hot transmission (Source: Weibo)
Is the so-called "Princess Learning Method" a pretend game, or a real motivation? Is it a fun way to learn, or is it childish self-deception?
More importantly, what is the distance between us and the "princess"?
How the "princess" learns
In a "princess schedule" circulating in the anecdote, there is no such thing as "lai bed". The "princesses" usually regard writing homework as "batch folding", and then they can be full of motivation, not afraid of busy official duties, and wear the stars and wear the moon to "take care of everything in the day". Just like a pair of "eyes" monitoring themselves at any time, image management will be meticulous, and learning efficiency will skyrocket.
The "Princess Learning Method Assessment" video released by @Kangmu, the main owner of Station B AND and who is studying at the University of International Business and Economics, has reached 685,000 views so far. She feels that the "princess learning method" is very similar to the method she used to enter the learning state before: before learning, she will usually listen to a light music with her eyes closed, and the music is best to have a sense of story and emotional ups and downs, "Imagine that you are the protagonist in the story, and after listening to it and then learning, you will be more calm and learn more seriously." In her opinion, this feeling is magical, different from the previous feeling of "learning for your own future", and the sense of mission of "learning for the country and the people" is more convincing to herself.
UP Master Kang Mu Ah Practice Princess Learning Method
(Source: UP Master @ Kang Mu Ah video "Recently very popular princess learning method evaluation |.) "Can't Learn" Screenshot)
But at the same time, the video's comments section also has many different voices:
"Other princesses: I must be self-disciplined, I want to fight for my country, my people!"
Princess Ben: Come! Then the music goes! Then dance! ”
"It still has to be a will, if I say: 'Grandpa is not a princess, the princess is not feeling well today and does not want to get up early.'" ”
It can be seen that the "Princess Learning Method" has disappeared in the eyes of some people. The examination log of another B station UP master @ goose, who is also a college student, also filmed the "Princess Learning Method" evaluation video. Her original intention was to test its authenticity from a relatively objective point of view, but as can be seen from the video, she did not go well in the later stages of practice.
The princess who quit the video at the end of the video
(Source: Screenshot of @Goose's exam insertion log video "Hot Princess Learning Method Assessment / New Attempts to Learn Bloggers")
After first-hand experience, she found that this novelty approach can indeed bring about a short-term self-discipline effect, but it is only suitable for short-term learning processes. If you are in the learning state of the "princess" every day, you will be unbearable and will try to jump out and return to the normal state of life and learning. After all, no one wants to be a "writer who has been killed by the publishing house" all the time. But she also believes that girls who are less confident can gain confidence from the "Princess Learning Method" and can express their views to others more confidently.
However, Don Wangyue, a 2020 undergraduate student at the School of International Relations, is not optimistic about this method, "If a person learns to rely on suggestions every day rather than really loving knowledge, it is really too miserable." In her view, this "mental motivation" is tantamount to an "alarm clock", but "it is not the alarm clock that wakes you up every day, but the dream."
In a way, the "Princess Learning Method" has a bit of a "spiritual victory method", as if it reflects the Pygmalion effect in psychology - when you believe in what you are, you will eventually become something.
Comparing herself to the princess, demanding herself, clearly knowing that she is not a princess, and believing that she can become a "princess". In the face of such a learning and imitation process, many girls are contradictory.
Little Red Book blogger @ make money to raise ma ma is also the producer of related videos. She believes that the "Princess Learning Method" is more like a sense of ceremony that girls give themselves, showing not the admiration of the so-called Disney princesses, but more of an affirmation of the self.
Another Little Red Book blogger @ Xiao Mu Ge said that their whole dormitory is using this method, dressed up beautifully and studying together, which makes the final week a little less painful. But some netizens believe that this is a manifestation of self-deception and a sense of ritual, which is somewhat childish.
Is the "princess" that the girls learn is a "mirror" or a "shadow"? In essence, the "Princess Learning Method" is actually "learning the Princess Law". Learn from the princess, take the princess as a mirror, be proactive, push yourself, and strive to become a better person.
But for girls, increasing their internal drive by imagining something sexual is not always a long-term solution. If you force yourself to become the "shadow" of following the princess, fantasize about yourself being in the limelight, and rely on psychological cues and imitation to learn, it is a practice of "treating the symptoms but not the root causes".
Tang Wangyue also has a more sober understanding of this, "This method makes you have a kind of expectation of good things in the future, when the girl is happy, she can solve a lot of things." But don't rely on this approach, be sure to know where your shortcomings are. ”
How to define "princess"
"Every girl is a princess."
Girls often hear such words, but most of them are tearful and quietly nodding their heads, facing reality and escaping with disdain. @Goose's examination journal said, "The standard of 'princess' is very high, and it is actually not appropriate to encourage every woman to move closer to this standard." ”
Ma Wang, an undergraduate student at Beijing Institute of Technology, has a different understanding of "princess". He believes that "the character of a person is more like a piece of raw rubber, perhaps not as plastic as high as plasticine, but as long as you keep pulling and reminding yourself, it will change." In his opinion, "princess" is a standard that girls demand of themselves, a direction of effort.
However, many people question that the so-called "standard" is only a standard defined by men - "gentle" and "beautiful" is considered a "princess". The emergence of terms such as "charming man" and "female competition" has also led to a debate about who is in the right to decide on the definition of women: is it the woman herself, or the outside world?
Disney Princess group photo (source network)
Liu Xiaoran, a 2021 undergraduate student at the School of International Relations, has his own views on this. "I feel that the word 'princess' is now demonized, and in some cases 'every girl is a princess' is used to mean 'every girl is rightfully favored by others', as if it meant 'canary' or 'princess disease'."
In her view, the essential connotation of this sentence is that every girl should love herself first, should be confident and independent, create her own value, and make herself a shining existence through efforts.
In fact, it is not necessary to think of yourself as a glamorous princess in a fairy tale, if you like Hermione, you can learn Hermione, and if you like Xue Baochao, you can learn Xue Baochao. As long as in the process of learning from these examples, find the motivation of your true love, find the most simple and noble state, and surpass your once ordinary self, you will become your own "princess".
As @Goose's exam journal says, "Girls don't have to be princesses, we just need to be better selves." Beauty, self-confidence, calm and generous, never because they are 'liked' so 'to learn', but because they are themselves shining qualities, they are used as banners by people. ”
Xiong Feng, a 2020 undergraduate student at the School of International Relations, believes that "there is a truly noble and pure 'princess' in her heart, and only when she behaves and talks will she have the elegant temperament and noble sentiments of the so-called princess." "This is something that cannot be imitated simply by using certain learning methods.
"Truly great people or groups never care to 'play' a role in humanity, or even to play a first-class role, but must 'become' a unique role." In Xiong Feng's view, women should not be limited to the theoretical words and deeds of others, but should carefully think about the future that they and their own groups should have.
In addition, in the view of Yu Muyang and Li Yonghao, 2020 undergraduates of the College of Letters, what girls should learn is not the "princess" in fairy tales, but the admirable women like Qiu Jin, Shi Jianqiao, Lin Qiaozhi, Shen Jilan, Zhang Guimei, Clara Cai Tejin, etc., outstanding representatives who fight for women's rights and interests, and heroic models who do practical things for women.
The short film "What is a Princess", co-produced by Disney and New World, also explains the many possibilities of "princess" and gives the power of definition to all girls outside the fairy tale. "The princess is not hypocritical, not pretentious, the princess is facing herself." "Princesses can be protected, or they can protect more people." "The princess is always pursuing herself and eventually surpassing herself." ......
People's first impressions of princesses
(Source: Screenshot of the new phase video "What is a Princess")
How old can be a "princess"
When it comes to the "princess learning method", some girls will have a "sense of shame" - "so old do you still want to be a princess?" ”
Is there an age limit for princesses?
Li Xiaomo is in the fourth grade of primary school, on weekends she will happily go to dance classes, writing classes, her small face is high and up, her eyes are bright; Chen Ling is already forty-eight years old, every morning and evening she will do gymnastics with the live broadcast room, there is no change in weight, but the figure is a lot slimmer; Wang Caiyun has been a grandmother for many years, but she will still dress herself carefully every day when she goes out, on the day of the interview, she wears a mint green sweatshirt with white loose pants...
When they were children, girls often looked at Barbie and the Seven Fairies, imitating themselves as rapunzels in a scarf. When you grow up, the meaning of "princess" is not only love and beauty, but also self-discipline, bravery and elegance. The age limit of "princesses" is also gradually breaking the boundaries.
Luo Lili is a working mother in her forties who could only attend secondary normal school due to family conditions when she was young. When she reached middle age and bumped into the era of information explosion, she confessed that she felt a deep intellectual anxiety. So in addition to busy work and housework, she developed an interest in learning English. Sometimes she couldn't squeeze in time, and she would even pick up the tablet at twelve o'clock in the middle of the night and talk clumsily but seriously to the foreign teachers on the other side of the ocean in the dark living room.
In addition to learning English, Luo Lili also created other "fortresses" for self-improvement at home: the bedroom windowsill is a neatly stacked makeup products, the wooden bookshelf at the head of the bed contains materials needed for work and books that she will read in her spare time, elliptical machines, yoga mats, balls of yarn... The utility room is full of her hobbies.
A corner of Luo Lili's desk (source interviewee)
For middle-aged women who climb up the hill in the workplace, have old and young, and be a "princess" is simply a fool's dream. But Luo Lili will not stop moving closer to the "princess" because she can't see the results for a while or is "sung down" by others. "Doing what you love to do and imagining the good effects of doing it is a pleasure." She said, "Even if there are times when people are not understood due to age, new women, as long as they think they are doing the right thing, should not pay attention to it." ”
Just like a flower blooms in four seasons, all four seasons can be flowering. Women of any age have the right to become their own "princesses".
Luo Lili believes that the pursuit of becoming a "princess" and pursuing her own refinement is in itself to please herself, "to find the basis and reason for self-confidence for myself." "Beautiful and exquisite, the mood is also beautiful, do anything more interesting, Luo Lili laughed and said that this is called "one smooth and one hundred smooth".
For the "Princess Learning Method", she is also very supportive of women to try it, and there is no need to be ashamed. She believes that as long as women are confident and self-loving, brave enough to try and progress, they are the "princesses" of their own world. It is really rare to be able to hold a kind of "stubbornness" that is not swayed by others under the pressure and discipline of society and still hold what you believe in.
@Little Magi mentioned a singer she likes very much. She often posts very bold outfits on social platforms, accepts and recognizes her current self, and does not care about the evaluation of others. There is a lyric in her new song:
“You can be whoever.”
She is the queen of her own world, her own "princess".
"I want to be that person too."
(In the text, Ma Wang, Liu Xiaoran, Luo Lili, Li Xiaomo, Chen Ling, Wang Caiyun are pseudonyms, @ Kang Mu Ah, @ Goose's Examination Log, @ Make Money to Raise Ma Ma, @ Little Mother Grid are all respondents' online names)
Interview: Tang Xinyun Luo Xi Wu Shiyu Du Ying Qin Xing
Jiang Xue, Zhao Zhuoya, Zhang Jingman, Xiong Bindong, Tong Yujie
Text: Ge Rongchen Dai Tingting
Images from respondents and the Internet
Editor: Dong Jing, Jiang Xue