Big S Gu Junye announces marriage! Netizens shouted, this development is also too fast!
Not long ago, Big S just divorced her ex-husband Wang Xiaofei, and her ex-husband's front foot was drunk late at night, and his back foot was rumored to be dating a tender model. Make a mess of chicken feathers.
I thought that big S would take a long time to come out, but I didn't expect to continue the front edge with the lover of 20 years ago!
Love is like a tornado. Either way, bless them here first.
Divorce, for many women, is a bottomless chasm. Once you step in, it's hard to get out again.
So for 30+ divorced women, what to do to let go of the pain and hurt of the past, continue to move forward, and maintain the ability to love and be loved.
01
Just losing someone you don't love, not someone who fails
Divorce is just an experience in life, and some people repeat the same mistakes and fall into a miserable state of life; some people seem to be beaten into a deeper hell and are devastated; and some people grow from it, such as nirvana rebirth.
There is such a topic on Zhihu Zhihu: How does a woman live after divorce? 196 followers, 682,400 views.
A netizen replied: Every time I go back to my mother's house, I can feel the contempt of my neighbors and villagers, and my parents often complain as if I am divorced and I am as unsightly as if I have committed a crime. Didn't think about remarrying, didn't believe I could meet a better man, and lost hope for marriage and love.
There are also many netizens who also have similar replies, believing that their lives are poor after divorce, that they are unable to support themselves, that this life is ruined, that they are a failed person, and that they are full of resentment.
In fact, mentality is very important, when you choose to complain, choose to give up on yourself, then life also chooses to give up on you, complaining about the world is the most unwise choice.
At that time, the article Ma Yili's divorce door can be called a boiling fire, the man is not only the wrong party, but also by the network media exposed, not to the woman is not respected and inferior.
What is admirable is the woman's way of handling and the attitude of life for the rest of her life. The phrase " Do it and cherish it " is even better.
After experiencing divorce, Ma Yili returned to the show business circle and said at the Bailan Awards ceremony: "Women don't live to please others, I hope you live for yourself, everyone has only one chance in their lives, to be brave and hard to love, to struggle, you can also make mistakes, but remember, you must grow!" ”
Not only to warn herself, but also to wake up the vast number of women who live for others, not to give up on themselves, self-love and self-improvement.
Divorced women, to get rid of the negative should not have thoughts, a marriage that can not accompany you through the rest of your life is not worth denying yourself, with a positive attitude to face life. Divorce is just the next state of life, not a failed life.
02
It is better to open your heart to an interesting person than to be an interesting person
In the movie "Untouchable", there is such a sentence: if we don't open our hearts, for ten thousand years we will still only rub shoulders with interesting people, and more importantly, maybe we are the people who are boring and should not meet.
A frustrated marriage, only indulged in it, will only get deeper and deeper.
The more discouraged, the colder the heart.
Deny it completely, close yourself, don't want to open your heart, and don't want to change.
Life is an irresistible advance. Don't let the future you hate your present self.
Ma Qing's "Live as you like" is such a sentence: Do what you like, open your heart to be yourself, as long as it does not affect others.
Knowing that liking yourself is always more important than liking others, you can reflect on your own past experiences, but not just reflect, you need to change.
People always expect the situation to change in their favor, but they overlook the fact that they must first change themselves.
Neighbor Ami is a very fat woman, all day fierce every smiley face, do not interact with everyone, and the husband quarreled all day, and then divorced and moved to live with her parents, the house is also empty, after two years of one day, there is a very thin and very spiritual little girl greeting, only to know that it was Ami.
Everyone was surprised, because in everyone's impression, Aramis were fat and not motivated, watching TV at home all day, not cooking meals, and not going to work. The husband also really can't stand it before choosing to divorce.
Later, when I had the opportunity to sit down and chat together, I found that the former Ami had changed, was positive and optimistic, had her own career, and found a new boyfriend, and this time she came back to live again.
Also Mei Zi zi said to everyone: We will have more contact in the future, I still have a lot to learn to change, I can now cook, have a job, oh, you can also share the tricks of weight loss.
When the person who doesn't like to smile and keeps his face open all day to accept beautiful things, the whole person is glowing, like a little sun.
Learn a skill, learn to cook a dish, read more than one book, explore new things, embrace new ideas, be fun and unique, if you bloom, the breeze will come.
In the TV series "The First Half of My Life", Luo Zijun's change not only supported his son, but most importantly, he achieved himself. Let her find the value of life, after passing through the stage of self-doubt and sadness, accept the opinions of friends, take the initiative to learn, and change herself.
Open your heart, let the sun shine in, dispel the haze in our hearts, and feel life with a heart that is good at discovering beauty and happiness.
03
The need for the rest of my life: I am the one who is in that network
In the seventh season of "Strange Story", in the face of the debate of "do you want to use your predecessor as a network", Ma Dong asked Yang Mi: "Will you treat your predecessor as a network?" ”
Yang Mi responded domineeringly: "I think I am the one who is in that network." ”
So why Yang Mi dares to be so domineering, is because in 2020, she is worth up to 4.5 billion yuan, and she was selected for the eighth time in the Forbes China Celebrity List, ranking 6th.
Because I have the strength, I have the courage to "talk harshly".
As the old saying goes: Poor couples are in decline.
In the book "The Ordinary World", it is written: "Money is a good thing, it can make people stop panicking, and make people feel confident." ”
Liu Mintao, 44, looks back on her time as a full-time wife, living a life with her palms up, relying on her husband for money.
After the divorce, Liu Mintao returned to the workplace and became financially independent.
She deliberately returned to the street of Kiyomizu-dera Temple and found the matcha ice cream she had in mind to eat.
Liu Mintao said confidently: "Taste carefully, that is the taste of freedom." ”
The spiritual independence brought about by economic independence is the best way to keep the heart full, and it is also the best way to bring about a sense of security.
After the colleague suddenly became pregnant, he resigned, thinking of relying on his husband to eat, but what he was waiting for was the husband's dislike and the contempt of the in-laws.
After the birth of the child, but still confinement, she will buy some children's things on the Internet, every time she receives the courier, the mother-in-law will shoot it down and send it to her son, saying that your wife spends money indiscriminately, which will definitely cause them to quarrel between husband and wife.
Economic status determines the status of the family, although there is no job, but she alone takes care of the housework and takes care of the children, which is taken for granted by her husband.
Once, ran ran was sick, the child was not brought, the husband took a day off to take the child, he scolded Ran Ran for a full day.
At that moment, it was suddenly understood that a person who had no money, even being sick, was wrong, and after careful consideration, decided to divorce and return to the workplace.
Since then, ran has never been blamed for spending money, and his life is wonderful.
No matter where you are now, only economic independence can support the courage to continue to walk for the rest of your life, and in the face of doubts and difficulties, you do not have to seek perfection and do not have to whisper.
The world flowers blossom and fall, the sun and the moon rotate, please do not immerse yourself in the sad days of the past, lick the wounds to live, the wounds will only be deeper; it is better to think about the pain, endure, and wait for the scabs to fade. There may be scars, but remember that it is a hero's medal.
Author: Ru Junruo, a post-90s young sister who loves fantasy, painting, skating, and traveling, may the world be peaceful, and may the little cuties be safe and happy.