If there is love in heaven, the love that is old and the two loves are happy but cannot keep each other is such a regret and torture.
This kind of love story that can only love each other and cannot stay together also happened to the famous writer Miss Zhang Ailing.
If the thoughts are tangible, then as Zhang Ailing wrote in "Little Reunion": the sound of rain is babbling, like living by the stream, I would rather it rain every day, thinking that you are not coming because it is raining.
Zhang ailing
But this sentence was not actually written to her first husband Hu Lancheng, but to her second little-known lover, Sang Arc.
The emergence of the mulberry arc, a beam of light from the trough of life
As a famous writer, Zhang Ailing's works such as "Small Reunion", "The Golden Lock", and "Love in the Fallen City" were all hot at that time.
In the process of exploring love, she integrates her own understanding into her works, passing on to the reader as the words flow between the papers.
After the publication of the work, the copyright fee, the publication fee, and the manuscript fee are all a lot of income, and it is reasonable to say that such a rich income will have a more moist life, but in fact, it is not so.
Hu Lancheng and Zhang Ailing
Zhang Ailing, who is married, gave most of her financial income to her husband Hu Lancheng in the name of common property after marriage.
As the most important part of Zhang Ailing's love history, Hu Lancheng influenced Zhang Ailing for a long time.
At that time, Hu Lancheng's evaluation was not good, and he even had the title of "cultural traitor", and what was even more excessive was that during his outing to hide from the limelight, he also picked flowers and weeds everywhere and had many extramarital affairs.
Even though Zhang Ailing found out that after the relationship broke down and left him, the two did not completely break up and divorce, it may be that the love for Hu Lancheng failed to make himself fierce.
Because Hu Lancheng was known as a "cultural traitor", Zhang Ailing, who was a husband and wife, was also involved, and no one dared to include her works or dare to include them, and in the end she also ended up in a miserable body.
Writers who write for a living, no one to include works is equivalent to cutting off the source of income, and there is almost no basic guarantee for life.
Later in life, Zhang Ailing's life was extremely difficult, and there was even a period of time when she drank grapefruit juice every day to satisfy her stomach.
After such a period of time, under the great pressure of life, Zhang Ailing had to take the initiative to seek the opportunity to turn over.
The current tricky thing is that she needs money to protect her life, so she does not hesitate to sell the copyright fee of her work to change her novel into a script, and the important person who discusses how to compile the novel into a script is Sang Arc.
Mulberry arc
Sang Arc, real name Li Peilin. At this time, Sang Arc was already a well-known choreographer in Shanghai, so he was fully responsible for the compilation of this script.
Zhang Ailing and Sang Arc formally met through the boss's introduction at the discussion meeting.
Because the author, screenwriter and other important personnel, when discussing the compilation of the novel script, it is inevitable to get acquainted with each other to facilitate project communication.
At this kind of discussion meeting, Zhang Ailing, who writes at home on weekdays and is not good at interpersonal communication, appears to be particularly restrained, and the delicate Sang Arc finds her silent and brings up the red wine to prepare to talk with her.
And wearing an Irish-style plaid woolen coat, the face is full of smiles and easy to talk to Sang Arc, did not get Zhang Ailing's approval, and even felt that he had some frivolity, so he did not respond too much.
Sang Arc was also very interested, silently sat back in her position and fell silent with her, the action without words was like a kind of alternative companionship, this behavior also deeply shocked Zhang Ailing.
In the days that followed, due to the need to talk about the script, she had to go to Zhang Ailing's residence many times to discuss the script, and Sang Arc was afraid that when she was alone with Zhang Ailing, she would feel uncomfortable, so she would bring an assistant with her every time she went.
Zhang Ailing, who originally had no confidence in the screenwriter, insisted on completing this road with the encouragement of Sang Arc.
Many of his words gave her great encouragement, and over time, Zhang Ailing's impression of Sang Arc's frivolity also changed.
With the completion of the script adaptation, Zhang Ailing's relationship with Sang Arc also ushered in a qualitative breakthrough.
In 1947, the film "No Love", based on Zhang Ailing's novel, appeared on the screen.
As soon as the film came out, Zhang Ailing, who had a precarious creative career, once again became famous and re-entered the reader's field of vision.
The soaring box office and the audience's love for the film made Sang Arc ready to hit the iron while it was hot, and wanted to cooperate with Zhang Ailing on the script of the next "Long Live the Wife".
"Long Live the Wife"
In the process of filming and communication, their relationship became closer and closer, and at first sang arc, who was still an assistant, gradually discussed the script with Zhang Ailing alone and in his residence.
As the days went by, Sang Arc as a director and Zhang Ailing as a screenwriter also spread the gossip.
One is a handsome young man with a successful career, and the other is a beautiful screenwriter and writer who combines talent and beauty, and their actions have gradually entered the public's vision.
The incident of a love because of a play is not uncommon in the circle of acting, and Zhang Ailing and Sang Arc have also sparked a spark of love.
Stills from "Long Live the Wife"
But this brilliant spark of love was destined to be born in the dark under the influence of Hu Lancheng.
Although Hu Lancheng had an extramarital affair in other residences, after all, Zhang Ailing and Hu Lancheng have not divorced.
Once their relationship is admitted to the public, it will inevitably cause reputational damage to both of them, bring pressure to public opinion, and more importantly, it will inevitably have an impact on the development of their careers in the future.
As for when Zhang Ailing and Hu Lancheng divorced, Sang Arc also acted as a catalyst in it.
At that time, Zhang Ailing and Hu Lancheng had more or less heard about the matter, and the private affairs of the two did not know much, since the two were already together, it was inevitable that they would be somewhat curious about Zhang Ailing's past.
Sang Arc, who is four years older than Zhang Ailing, has been asking her like a naïve big boy: Oh, are you a good person or a bad person?
And Zhang Ailing did not want Sang Arc to know too much about the past, always prevaricating in a naughty tone, but like watching a movie when she was a child, seeing a person appear, she quickly asked "This is a good person and a bad person"?
Sang Arc sometimes hugged Zhang Ailing and muttered to herself, describing her as elusive as a big cat.
Out of Sang Arc's obsession with the problem of good people and bad people, Zhang Ailing could no longer shake the guilt and affection in her heart, replied that Sang Arc said that she was a good person, and then Zhang Ailing sent a note to Hu Lancheng with guilt.
After Sang Arc learned of this matter, in the usual relationship, he did not dwell too much on this issue, and Zhang Ailing, after saying goodbye to Hu Lancheng, also had less guilt for Sang Arc in this feeling, and would not let him feel that he was suffering from gain and loss.
Since then, Zhang Ailing's feelings with Sang Arc have been heating up, and love is so magical that it will change a person, and Zhang Ailing is no exception.
Ben did not pay attention to her own image, because of a sentence from Sang Arc, she began to apply grease and powder on her face, and when she went out shopping to watch movies, there was no lack of heavy makeup on her face.
As a director, Sang Arc looks at her makeup like examining stage makeup, telling her that there is no powder on her face for a while, and telling her that her face is full of oil and powder, and her makeup looks very bad.
Portrait of Zhang Ailing
Such a "straight man" answer can't help but make the sensitive Zhang Ailing feel embarrassed, but this is not the process of gradually accepting the other party.
Just when the feelings of the two people heated up rapidly, an uninvited guest broke the sweet time between Zhang Ailing and Sang Arc.
It was a godsend and tested by her ex-husband
This uninvited guest was none other than Zhang Ailing's ex-husband, Hu Lancheng.
After Hu Lancheng received Zhang Ailing's farewell book, he did not know what kind of psychology he came to find Zhang Ailing again, and they no longer had the enthusiasm when they met again.
Hu Lancheng and Zhang Ailing
Zhang Ailing only asked why she was visiting with a very plain face, and Hu Lancheng only replied that she simply wanted to meet.
They came to the living room, Zhang Ailing brewed tea for him, and the two sat together, long without the enthusiasm and attraction of the past, and the scene was once silent.
A phone call broke the deadlock, and it was a call from Mulberry Arc.
The presence of Zhang Ailing's ex-husband made her usual joyful conversation become panicked, and there were even some incoherent words, and the delicate Sang Arc also felt Zhang Ailing's uneasiness.
He anticipated Hu Lancheng's visit, and Zhang Ailing's panic also confirmed his speculation, so he only left a sentence that was inconvenient now and hung up the phone another day.
Still
Hu Lancheng, who was sitting in the living room, was also very curious, who was on the other end of the phone, which would make Zhang Ailing so panicked, whether it was a man or a woman, and what was the relationship.
Hu Lancheng wanted an answer, but Zhang Ailing felt that she was already an ex-husband and did not need to know more, so she casually prevaricated a reason.
Hu Lancheng seems to have sensed her change, no enthusiasm, and no performance when he loves him. Therefore, he took out a photo of his current girlfriend, Xiaokang, to Zhang Ailing's loving introduction.
Sure enough, Zhang Ailing behaved unusually calmly, like the surface of the sea, which made him know that two people were no longer possible.
The first on the left is Hu Lancheng
Zhang Ailing looked at Qingxiu's face on the photo, and was not angry, nor did she rip the photo like the other wives, but slowly put it on the table, indicating that if it was before, she would definitely feel pain for such an act, but now it has changed, and it will not be.
Hu Lancheng, who was just about to lead the reason, was interrupted by Zhang Ailing, who deliberately did not say why it changed, because everything became unnecessary, and even felt that sitting too close to the person in front of her who had once loved made her feel uncomfortable sitting too close.
That night, Zhang Ailing put another room for Hu Lancheng to sleep, that is, a night when nothing happened, so that both people realized that each other had become each other's past, and there would be no more intersection in the future.
After Hu Lancheng left the next day, Zhang Ailing took her sincerity of love and told Sang Arc everything.
Zhang Ailing (first from left)
Sang Arc, the boyfriend of this big boy, knew that it was inevitable to be jealous, Zhang Ailing quickly explained to him that she did not shake hands with him, and Sang Arc also replied with a gamble that he should not let him touch anything.
After this incident, the young couples returned to the original hot love period, but the gentle and elegant Sang Arc still did not announce their love affair with Zhang Ailing.
In order not to let Zhang Ailing bear the insult of being influenced by her ex-husband, Zhang Ailing is also worried that her own encounter will affect Sang Arc's career.
Zhang Ailing looks forward to living like this forever, without outsider interference, and she has been happy.
She found herself stopping for two months and secretly rejoicing, thinking that she had a love crystal with Sang Arc, and her life was about to peak, and she did not know that what was waiting for her was the Abyss Rift Valley.
Estrangement, missing out on what you love
The two happy people were extremely happy for this upcoming little life, and Sang Arc also specially asked the doctor to examine Zhang Ailing.
But the result was a great disappointment, and the reason for the menopause was not because of the arrival of new life, but because of Zhang Ailing's own cervix break.
As for why this is the case, doctors also say that the high probability is that it is caused by irregular artificial induction of labor, and it is very likely that in the future, there will be no more fertility.
Such news for Zhang Ailing, like a thunderbolt on a sunny day, in this era when her mind is not yet fully open, as a woman, not only is she not innocent, but also because of this kind of thing, she can no longer have children, so that she no longer has the face to face the mulberry arc.
Zhang Ailing also never expected that she had thought that she had completely broken off with Hu Lancheng, but in the end she could not escape his influence.
Hearing the doctor's words, Sang Arc did not say a word, just quietly silent, but it was this silent silence that made Zhang Ailing feel more heartfelt than angry scolding.
Zhang Ailing hoped that he would say something, even if he scolded her and blamed her, it would make her feel that the person in front of her still had her in her heart. Unfortunately, there was none, some were just silent, just like when I first met him, only this time it was not shock but panic.
Zhang Ailing and Sang Arc
In the days that followed, Sang Arc comforted herself that she did not mind this matter, but it was Zhang Ailing herself who really cared about this matter, she could not convince herself to accept the cruel reality, and she was already sensitive and inferior, so she completely shattered her only self-esteem.
She began to deliberately distance herself from the Mulberry Arc, a person who was bent on quitting in love, and the other party could not be retained, even if it took a lot of effort.
Until Zhang Ailing left silently, Sang Arc seemed to understand and did not make a reservation.
She disappeared into each other's lives for three whole years, and when she saw her beloved Sang Arc again, she pretended to calmly ask if she was married? The other person's answer was: Already married.
Mulberry Arc (middle)
These simple five words actually set off a huge wave in Zhang Ailing's heart, and she saw the sang arc reported in the newspaper and the news of a beautiful female star's happy marriage, and her heart was extremely stinging.
Seeing that the person you love has grown old with others, how can your heart not be painful?
After that, they did not talk too much, and Zhang Ailing only silently left the sad place with the mulberry arc - Hong Kong, and went abroad to start her own secluded life.
In foreign countries, Zhang Ailing met a third person who was impressed by her, the foreign writer Lai Ya.
Zhang Ailing Laiya
Dramatically, Zhang Ailing, who thought she could not get pregnant, became pregnant with Laiya's child, but because of the economic problems at that time, she had to fight it, and then ended her reclusive and plain life in a foreign country.
Looking back at Zhang Ailing's emotional past, she could hardly escape the words she wrote after the photo: "When I met him, she became very low and very low, low to the dust." But her heart was joyful, and flowers blossomed from the dust. ”
Some people look back on the past all their lives, but the real story will always be tomorrow. When encountering true love, cherish it, and hope that there will be lovers in the world who will eventually become dependents.