Five languages of love

Once I had lunch with a few Spanish teachers, two weeks before Christmas, and everyone was busy buying gifts. A newly married Spanish teacher said that my husband is really difficult to buy, he is not careful about gifts, hard work to pick a valuable gift for him, it is better to praise him more than usual. At this time, a teacher said that for him, the language of love is not a gift, but a compliment! Another teacher said that if you are right for the problem, you can make a card or video and collect all the praises he cares about, and it will definitely be useful! I remembered the book I had just borrowed, "Five Languages of Love," and asked them: Are you speaking the five languages of love? Have you all read this book? I'm getting ready to see it! They said they hadn't read the book, but the five languages spoken in it made sense. Then everyone began to discuss what language they and their family mainly spoke.

When my daughter fell asleep, I couldn't help but share the five languages in the book with my husband while reading the book, and I suddenly realized after discussing it! No matter how much you think you love someone, you don't use his good language to love him, he can't feel it, you are hard here, he is full of complaints. To paraphrase Huang Xiaoming's words, I don't want you to think you love me, I want you to think you love me. Although the words are a bit roundabout, after reading the cases of those couples in the book, it is really so.

What this book roughly means is that there are about five ways we express and receive love:

The first is physical touch.

The second is words of affirmation.

The third is quality time.

The fourth is gifts.

The fifth is acts of service.

Just like language, when we were children, we can accept any language, learn any language, slowly, we have determined our first language, Chinese feel that Chinese can only speak the heart, speak English will feel that it is still easy to speak English, of course, a lifetime is bilingual or multilingual people also have. The language of love is also similar, unconsciously most of us have determined the first language, there may be a second, third or even more language, when others use foreign languages or unfamiliar languages to communicate with you, you will feel that it is a chicken and a duck.

After discussion, my first language is companionship, and when needed you are not in the other is virtual. My second language is service, I love you I will make you a poached egg to eat, you love me you will help me hand me a glass of water to drink. My husband's first language was physical contact, and every time my daughter and I tried to break free of his bear hug, he was very upset, and there was nothing to hold my daughter left and right. As soon as they meet now, they still hug and kiss first, and when something is wrong, they suddenly hug each other. At one party, I saw his dad and his aunt suddenly embracing each other affectionately for several minutes, and I asked my husband, what's wrong with them? What happened to the family? He said lightly, it's all right, he suddenly wanted to hug! The second language he felt was companionship, I think it was a gift, as soon as Christmas passed, I wanted to put all the gifts together, he said, or put the gifts under the tree first, how lonely is the remaining Christmas tree!