Writer Bi Shumin once said:
"What a woman has is wisdom. They are more clever, but what they lack is great sobriety. ”
Especially when I was young, I did everything with my heart and lungs, full of enthusiasm, no remorse, no soberness to speak of.
At a certain age, I understand that in life, once I am intimate with people, everything is too deep, and I will inevitably hurt myself.
A woman's good life is to live out her wisdom after being precipitated by time.
Understand that being a person with thin feelings is the best way to deal with people.
Recently, I blocked my old classmates.
An old classmate who has not been in touch for a long time sent me a message:
"Move your little hand, help me, and you'll get the prize soon!"
For the sake of my old classmates, I clicked on the link and followed the steps, but after an hour or two, I couldn't touch the doorway of the help.
Finally, I gave up and told her directly:
"I'm sorry, I just tried it, but I can't help it."
I thought it was over.
Unexpectedly, the other party immediately played a voice over, taught me how to operate, and told me:
"The system shows that the offer you help is the most, you help me, we have been a classmate for so many years."
I followed his prompts and made a drastic operation, but it did not help success.
I thought he would thank me for my kindness, but he said:
"You didn't bother to help me at all, they are all old classmates, and they don't talk about affection at all."
Seeing this message, I was angry, but I also understood that I was in this thankless situation because I cared too much about the feelings of others.
Later, I blacked out my old classmates, and the world became quiet.
We often say that affectionate people are easy to win people's hearts.
That's true.
Interacting with people is to pay the true feelings, but sometimes because of the obstruction of face and make some undesirable moves, it may not have good results.
There is a topic on the Internet: "Is there a moment in your life that makes you feel particularly cool?" ”
The highest praise answer is not to chase after the person you have liked for a long time, nor to get a promotion and salary increase, but to pluck up the courage to reject a person who has repeatedly asked you for help without a bottom line.
We are always like this, often in order to take care of others, and we have wronged ourselves, which seems to be affectionate to others, but it is actually a consumption of ourselves.
To treat people and things, to be a little more affectionate, is not to make us become indifferent and heartless, but to refuse to refuse, to stay away.
After all, not all true feelings in this world can be exchanged for sincere treatment.
When you face the requests of others, do not understand the thin feelings, can not pull down the face, then it is bound to usher in countless requests for help, so that your life into a dilemma.
And when you learn to be affectionate, you don't have to be careful with others, and life will be more and more enjoyable.
Sometimes, the so-called good life begins with the phrase "I don't want to."
Writer Li Xiaoyi once said: "Women with good lives are all dead with themselves and do not compete with others." ”
The so-called dead end is to be cruel to yourself, especially at work.
When a person and a woman have a thin affection for themselves, luck comes uninvited.
I saw a story online and was inspired.
There is a Shandong girl, because her father is paralyzed in bed, after graduating from high school, she took on the responsibility of earning money to support her family.
At first, with no education and no background, she could only work in a dumpling restaurant.
Most of the day is a large pot of dumpling filling, constantly wrapping and wrapping until you can't lift your arms and pinch the dough.
A monthly salary of 1900 yuan, only 500 for myself, the rest are given to the family.
She was reluctant to spend money to eat outside, so she ate dumplings in the store every day, and once she ate them for more than a year, she was sick to her stomach when she thought of dumplings now.
The eldest sisters who worked in the shop with her at the beginning advised her not to be so realistic, and a girl should know how to feel sorry for herself and learn to be lazy.
But she felt that even if she was a little tired, she had to do her best job.
Therefore, as soon as she has time, she goes online to study how to wrap the dumplings quickly and well.
Soon surpassed everyone, for which the boss gave her a raise.
But she knew she couldn't wrap dumplings for a lifetime.
After her father's death, she took her mother to the city to work.
She started from the hotel waiter, with the energy of working hard with the work, working seriously during the day, staying up late at night to study how to make beds more efficiently, clean up, and how to communicate with guests better.
It didn't take long for her to rise from the lowest level of waiter to team leader, lobby manager, and now vice president of the hotel.
In this way, she completely changed her life.
The eldest sisters who used to work with her are still wrapping dumplings and spreading sheets.
Compared with them, she is too cruel and affectionate to herself, as if she does not know how to love herself.
But behind this thin affection is her sober understanding of her own life.
She knows better than most people around her that she has to do her best for what she wants.
Everyone wants to live comfortably, but any good time is exchanged for carrying the weight forward.
To be a little affectionate with yourself is not to be self-loving, but to know how to restrain and restrain yourself.
Uneasy with the status quo, not following the tide, when it is time to be cruel, be fierce, do not indulge themselves, in order to get out of the quagmire of life and live a good life.
Lu Yu once asked Kwong Meiyun: "Lost love, what do you do?"
Kwong MeiYun said: "I will lock myself up for a week, and when I come out, I will be fine." ”
A woman with a good life never stays in the wrong feelings for too long.
In the TV series "Love Is Delicious", Fang Xin, played by Zhang Hanyun, married early after graduating from college and became a full-time wife.
Married for many years, her husband Ma Zhenyu has always been very fond of her.
Because Fang Xin is allergic, in order to ensure her dietary safety during the epidemic, Ma Zhenyu also specially found the eldest sister of the same community to cook for her.
However, in the process of a suspected case investigation, the staff took out a video of Ma Zhenyu cheating with his neighbors, and the original beautiful appearance was instantly punctured.
It turned out that the so-called "big sister" was the third party in their marriage.
In the past, Ma Zhenyu made mistakes, as long as a few good words, Fang Xin would no longer care.
But this time, it really touched her bottom line.
She decided to take back her due property, directly hired a lawyer, and confronted Ma Zhenyu in court.
Seeing that Fang Xin was very resolute, Ma Zhenyu played the emotional card while using his parents as an excuse to try to occupy the house for himself.
And Fang Xin directly and ruthlessly debunked Ma Zhenyu's careful thinking, she said:
"You just said so much, let me summarize, probably we are going to divorce, your parents want to get a little more money for you, and then how do they want to take the house for themselves." 」
"Now that I've finally figured it out, you don't deserve me at all.
So from now on, please don't have anything to do with me, and don't come to me again, okay? ”
Fang Xin's determination and thin affection are the end of that wrong marriage, and it is also the beginning of her new life.
Fang Xin, who has regained her new life, not only opens all the way in the workplace, but also meets people who treat her with kindness and honesty in life.
Emotionally, the quick knife cuts the mess, which seems to be thin, but it is actually the best protection for yourself.
It is not terrible to meet the wrong person, but it is terrible to be obsessed with it and fall deeper and deeper.
At the end of the day, you'll find that in a wrong relationship, all the indecisiveness is left to pay for yourself.
In the face of wrong feelings, stop losses in time and learn "thin feelings" is a woman's greatest wisdom.
Dare to give up and not to entangle, so that the love road for the rest of life can go smoother and smoother.
We often say, "Destiny is determined by Heaven." ”
A person's origin, appearance, and IQ are all given by God, but what kind of life they want to live is created by themselves.
If you want to live a comfortable and happy life, you must learn to be affectionate.
In the midst of complicated interpersonal relationships, you are not afraid to reject others and give yourself breathing space in life.
At work, be strict with yourself, be a little affectionate, and one day good luck will be taken care of.
In the face of the love that has been lost, quickly cut through the mess and cut off the love, in order to meet a new life.
For the rest of your life, if you want to live better and better, please be a "thin affection" woman.
The author | Jiang Zhu, reading and writing to live with heart.
The anchor | Tong Tong, public number: Tong Tong Night Listening, Douyin: Tong Tong's Voice Classroom.
Pictures | Visual China