Tantrums are instinctive, and controlling temper is a skill.
Hundreds of diseases originate from qi, and truly intelligent people have a big pattern, an open mind, and do not easily get angry.
Because they know very well that it is not worth getting angry with villains, getting angry with themselves, getting angry with their relatives, and hurting their feelings is not worth the loss in the end.
01
Anger increases annoyance
Anger not only cannot solve the problem, but also disturbs the mind and adds to the troubles and troubles of oneself.
When people are angry, their IQ is zero, and at this time, if they only care about venting their anger, it is easy to do things that they regret, and in the end, it is more than worth the loss.
Newspapers once reported on this:
After graduating, a college student applied for product marketing at a company, and the company offered to try it out for three months.
Three months later, the college student did not receive a formal employment notice, so he angrily went to the deputy manager theory, stated everything he had paid for the company, and then scolded the company for not knowing talent and not being fair enough to himself.
Then, enraged, he offered his resignation.
The deputy manager asked him to think again, and he became more and more angry and said a lot of complaining.
So the other party also moved, telling him plainly that in fact, the company had not only decided to formally hire him, but also prepared to promote him to deputy director of the marketing department.
Such a fuss, the company can no longer use him anymore. The uninvolved college student lost a great job opportunity in vain because of his tantrums.
When getting along with people, there are some small misunderstandings, we will be unhappy, but at this time, we must let ourselves be calm and do not be emotional.
80% of the mistakes people make in their lives are caused by anger.
02
It is better to be angry than to be angry
Angry, angry is yourself, it will make the relatives painful, the enemy fast.
It is easy to make them cold when you are angry with people who care about you; the more angry you are with the unworthy villain, the more happy they are, so why torture yourself to find guilt?
So, instead of getting angry, it's better to be angry.
Emperor Huizong of Song was very fond of calligraphy and painting, and his attainment of calligraphy and painting was not shallow.
One day, he asked his entourage: Who in the world painted the best donkey?
After inquiring around, the entourage hurriedly learned that a painter named Zhu Ziming was known as a "donkey painter", that is, he was summoned to the palace to paint donkeys.
When Zhu Ziming learned that he was summoned to the palace to draw a donkey for the emperor, he couldn't help but break out in a cold sweat. Originally, he was originally a very skilled landscape painter, but because of this, he was jealous of his peers and spread rumors everywhere to belittle him, saying that he was a "donkey painter".
However, the holy order was difficult to violate, so he had to start painting donkeys with a hard scalp.
He practiced donkey painting hard, painted hundreds of paintings about donkeys, and finally got the emperor's appreciation, truly becoming "the first donkey painter in the world".
Zhu Zinian sighed tomorrow night: Jealousy is a bad thing, but also a good thing. Thank you jealous people, your scolding, derogatory and rumor-mongering have made me happen!
When others are jealous of you, you don't need to be angry, because anger is to punish yourself with the faults of others, and what you should do more is to turn jealousy into upward strength and rivet yourself.
When you are a little better than others, others will be jealous of you; but when you are much stronger than him, he will only be convinced.
03
Wise people who know how to manage emotions
Mr. Haruki Murakami has a saying: You are going to be a silent adult. You are not allowed to be emotional, you are not allowed to secretly miss, you are not allowed to look back, and you are not allowed to live another life.
Thinking about heaven, thinking about hell, many things, looking at problems with different mentalities, are likely to get different results.
The philosopher Immanuel Kant said: To be angry is to punish oneself for the mistakes of others. Life is created by oneself, and the mood is created by oneself.
There is a story:
One day, an old monk said to the young monk, "The master is going out, and this bottle of orchids is entrusted to you."
After the master left, one day there was a strong wind and the orchid accidentally broke.
The little monk blamed himself, and the master returned in a few days, but he never scolded the little monk.
The little monk was very puzzled, and couldn't help but ask the master, master, I broke your orchid.
Why don't you punish me?
The old monk said, you have forgotten our original intention when we first raised orchids, we raise flowers to appreciate the mood of happiness, but not to be angry.
Some things that can't be accepted for a while, wait for a while to look back, in fact, it is not a big deal, not as difficult to let go of as you think, and the grievances will eventually be light in the end.
Angry at every turn, irritable and violent, life will only get worse and worse, and calm, calm and open-minded, will have a better future.
Learn not to get angry first.
Calm and peaceful, open-minded, full of rivers, find great freedom for yourself, live calmly and open-mindedly!
Learn to be angry again.
Use your calm and calm, go along with your own life path, use your anger, and let those who anger you shut your mouth!