A friend complained to me:
His hometown is a fourth-tier city in the north, ranking fifth and sixth in the province.
He himself, working in a first-tier city, is currently operating in an Internet company with a monthly salary of 8,000.
His biggest problem now is that he is thirty years old in the New Year, and he does not know whether to stay in the big city or go back to his hometown.
He earns more than 8,000 yuan and wants to buy a house in the front line, but he doesn't have enough money.
The parents at home can not give too much support, the old man worked as a worker in the first half of his life, and then he has been doing breakfast business, and he has saved more than 100,000 yuan in his life.
Parents said that if you want to buy a house, we can sponsor 100,000, more than that.
I asked him, can you afford to buy a house in your hometown?
He said that yes, he has also saved more than 100,000 yuan in these years of part-time work, plus 100,000 yuan given by his parents, and he can pay a down payment in his hometown and have some decoration money left.
I said, isn't the problem solved, just go back to your hometown?
He shook his head:
No, it's hard for me to find a job back home. In our Nagada, private companies can count, just so many, I have submitted resumes, either did not apply, or the salary is too low to live.
He said with a bitter face:
The best way to go back to your hometown is to take the exam, but I see that I am 30 years old, and I estimate that I can be admitted, and at most I will be a temporary worker.
Talking about this, I suddenly found that the root cause of many people's pain and entanglement now is actually very similar to my friend:
The root of the pain is that there is great ambition and poor ability. Desire and reality do not match, and the strong sense of gap is anxious.
Those who are accurately reincarnated in first-tier cities are, after all, a minority.
Most of the more than one billion people are from all over the world, small cities, small counties, small towns and small villages.
Thanks to the improvement of the field of education, many people have left the small town where they were born and come to the big city to study and work.
Here, many people begin to make the first mistake in life, that is:
Working in a big city = being a big city person = being a big city person = you must stay in a big city
This way of thinking can be said to be the source of suffering for modern people.
Many people, in fact, do not have the ability to stay in the big city, but have been brainwashed "only if they stay in the big city can they be successful."
Holding this inexplicable obsession, and then looking down at your own mud-like life, it must be quite unpleasant to live.
I would like to give this type of person a few suggestions, hoping to help you get out of the confusion and pain.
First, you always have choices in your life.
Let's start with the house.
If you want to stay in a big city, the first problem young people face is: live.
Anything can be saved, everything can be reduced, but the "house" has no room for negotiation.
Only by buying a house can we really get a foothold in a big city, otherwise it is a rootless ping and a source of water.
First-tier city houses are expensive, which is an accepted fact.
But no one is forcing you to buy.
It's important to think clearly:
You want to buy it because you desperately want to stay in the big city.
If you don't want to stay in a big city, you naturally don't have to bear this ridiculously high price.
Since you really want to buy, really want to, then you work hard to make money, or you try to ask for money from your family.
In short, "want to stay in the big city, be a big city person" This is your desire.
If you want to realize this desire, you have to achieve it in various ways, and it is useless to say anything else.
The house is expensive, and that's because his resources are there.
Want to buy, but can't afford to buy, and then there is no action, just daily pain and entanglement, is it useful?
Don't you just look at the environment and resources of big cities and desperately want to stay?
For most ordinary people, giving and receiving are usually reciprocal.
If you want to enjoy the salary, job opportunities and medical construction in the big city, you can exchange it with a down payment, repay it with a mortgage, and exchange it with your savings for the rest of your life.
I think that's fair.
If you feel that it is unfair, the price is not reasonable, or "why do some people automatically become big city people by reincarnation"
This kind of thinking is also correct, if you feel angry or unfair, you can also go.
You can go back to your hometown, or go to the surrounding cities with reasonable prices, you can go anywhere.
Go where you think it's fair, or where you can afford to buy a house.
And so many people said:
I went to those places and couldn't find a job, or the salary was very low, not enough to live. (Like my friend said at the beginning of this article)
In fact, I think:
Work, on the other hand, is just a tool to make money, and the form and place are not important.
If you can't find any other job to make a living other than the current [this position] in [this company], that's still your problem.
It's that you don't have the ability to live the life you want.
That said, it's a bit cruel, but that's the truth of life.
Again, that sentence:
When desire is not worthy of ability, when ambition is not in line with reality, and when goals and life are deviated, there are only two solutions:
One, either lower the target;
Second, either work harder to achieve the goal.
Whichever option is chosen, eventually, the problem will be solved, and the problems that cannot be solved will fade over time.
Achieving goals and ambitions takes time.
If you want to achieve your goals, don't be in such a hurry; if you're in a hurry, lower your goals or look for another solution.
Now many people in their twenties, watching their colleagues and friends in their twenties buy a house in a big city, settle down, and their hearts are anxious.
But look at yourself, the salary is low, the parents can't help, this goal does not know when it will be achieved, every day long sighs, brows locked.
But in fact, you always have other solutions in your life.
In the world woven by capital, many people forget that everyone's life is a two-way choice, not a narrow one-way street.
But sadly, countless people are so intoxicated by the illusions and ambitions created by capital that they mistakenly regard these as their only goals in life.
Maybe someone happens to be successfully adapted, realizes wild hopes, and becomes the object of envy of everyone.
But more people, abandoned by reality, are left confused.
When you find that the so-called "dream" is gradually stripping away your life, let go of attachment appropriately.
If you can't catch a dream, you can get another dream.
discuss
Can't go on in the north, Shanghai and Guangzhou, can't afford to buy a house, and return to his hometown to buy a house is a loser?
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