Let me tell you about my recent life.
In July, waiting for the results of a very important thing, although I did not talk about my anxiety in any public place, but for almost half a month, I was anxious and nervous to insomnia, but even in such a situation, I did not lose reading and writing;
In the last ten days of August, there was a very urgent task that required me to sort out 260,000 words of material in ten days, not only copy and paste, but also to read these materials again, selectively sorting and summarizing. During that time, I was worried every day that I couldn't finish it, and every day I was so stressed that I wanted someone to help me share the work, and I even had the idea of looking for my children who were in junior high school and high school to help me tidy up. In those days, I opened my eyes every day, and all I had in mind was ddl, and what came to my mind was how much material I had to sort out today, and I was really tired. But in the end, before DDL, I got the job done.
In April, I need to hand over the manuscript of the new book with my editor, although the manuscript has been writing, the number of words in the manuscript is enough, but when I finally went through the manuscript of more than 100,000 words, I found that I grew rapidly in the past six months, I had a lot of new ideas, I wanted to replace some of the manuscripts i wrote half a year ago, the reason is very simple, I think I may be doing better now. This feeling is like, we now look back at our junior high school photos and essays, we will feel very childish, very stupid, not in the past we are not good, but now we have become better. I didn't have time to think about the amount of work I didn't want to do because I didn't want to deliver something I wasn't satisfied with for publication, so my first thought was to dive into the computer and revise the manuscript. And at the same time, there are other tasks and other matters to be dealt with. Because I was the only one who could be responsible for me, I lived in tension every day during that time, afraid that I was not careful enough to do this well, and constantly spurred myself to be more careful and more careful.
Including this May, I am preparing for a very important thing, basically most of the time every day is spent reading books and reading materials to do homework, the state of the day is not to relax, non-stop running forward, while also really envious of those who do not have much pressure to do in their hearts, can rest assured on the sofa to watch an episode of the TV series friends. And when this is over, I have two very important things to do this May, and both of them have quantitative criteria that require me to step out of my comfort zone and be stressed.
That's how I've been lately, there are always moments of anxiety, and there's a lot of stress every day. The pretty wonderful thing is that compared to the early twenties, when I encounter a little pressure, I have an emotional breakdown, and I can't wait to let the whole world know that I am the first hard work in the world, twenty-five years old, most of the time even if I feel that life is difficult, but I will no longer complain, but I am a little obsessed with this very busy and tired day in progress, always feel that I am very fulfilled. Even when I wrote the above words, I felt a sense of happiness and pride in my heart, glad that I had lived so fully in the past, and proud that I had survived.
The so-called growth, the long is never the age, but our attitude to life.
Life is always hard, there are always people who are sad, but there are always people who are happy. So why isn't the happy person you?
This is the biggest change in my mentality about life this year, and after my twenty-fifth birthday.
1. Learn to set a reward mechanism for your life
Like writing, or some creative, scientific research work, you need high-intensity brain power, mental work needs sugar work, so whether it is preparing for exams or engaging in some very brain-consuming work, you can prepare some sugar, one is to supplement physical strength, and the other is that eating sugar will really make people happy. Or use some encouragement to promise yourself that after you finish a certain job, you will allow yourself to go out and play, or buy something you want.
The only criterion for judging whether eating, drinking, and playing is good or bad, and whether there is an incentive mechanism is: I am willing.
Take me, I like to eat all the foods that are conducive to gaining weight, what fries fried chicken pizza, etc., are my favorite, because they are high-calorie foods, I usually control myself to eat. But if there is a period of time when I am busy and have a lot of work every day, I will intersperse a delicious meal in a busy and intense work, and give myself the idea of trying to get the work done and trying to get this busy day through.
Like the last rest day, I have to deal with a lot of work, the night before lying in bed, I think about what I want to eat most recently, make sure that the good food is hot dry noodles, and then give myself psychological hints "Tomorrow when the alarm goes off, get up, we will eat hot dry noodles." The next day the alarm clock sounded, I was going to press it, but I thought about eating hot dry noodles, how happy I was, and I quickly got up.
While eating hot dry noodles, give yourself a psychological hint: usually breakfast is very light, today reward you to eat such a bowl of sauce full of calories and full of food, I make you happy, you will eat and drink enough, to work harder, but also let me be happy.
Some happiness, eating can really bring you.
The meaning of the so-called pleasure in suffering is not that if the physical or mental pressure is greater, it does not matter, take the initiative to give yourself a little hope, encourage yourself to survive, there will be a happy thing. In the following days, because I was looking forward to this happy thing, I didn't feel bitter.
2. Learn to do self-psychological construction
In the past six months, whether it is preparing 260,000 words of materials, the pressure is so great that I seem to be back to my childhood, because I can't write the homework assigned by the teacher, I am in a hurry to cry; or to complete a difficult thing, in the face of completely unfamiliar fields, I have to doubt that I am a stupid melon every day. No matter how difficult the process was, I never wanted to leave it alone.
One of the things I have told myself repeatedly is that these things you do will forge you, will polish you, and will make you a more professional and responsible person.
In the process of my work and study life, I also encountered a lot of very boring and boring things that must be done, I could not stand the boring life before, and felt that life should be full of fresh excitement and fun every day. But in the past two years, I have changed my opinion, because I find that the professional books that are difficult to understand but very useful are boring; the things that seem to be powerful are difficult to do, and there are countless days and nights of collapse behind them.
Staying up late to work and study is not good at all. It's hard, it's hard, it's boring. I know.
But the most I have said to myself this year is also: a lot of work can only be done by thinking on your own; many professional valuable skills can only be obtained by doing things that others seem boring and boring; and a great life also begins with doing a small thing.
Our two strongest feelings, one is happiness, the other is hard work, give yourself a reason not to feel that this thing you are doing now is hard, then only happiness remains.
3. Don't run away, do the one that makes you feel hard
I always feel that life is sometimes inescapable, you have played a little clever in this place, escaped a disaster, suffered less, in another place, you have been fooled, will be double the difficulty to return to you.
For example, at this moment, you feel that the college entrance examination is difficult, you think that one of the exams you are preparing for is difficult, you want to fool the past, but I'm sorry, maybe in the future for a long time in life, you need to pay for your own momentary confusion.
So for one thing that is difficult to do at this moment, the most important thing to do is to bravely meet it and break through. Grit your teeth, kill out, and live this period of time steadily, then this matter will turn the page. At least not ashamed of yourself.
As for how to face this period of fighting, how to live happily?
One word, enrichment. When you feel that you are really working hard every day, whether it is memorizing words to do exam papers, or handling work, as long as you really do this well according to what you can do, and learn the skills, you will be happy from the heart.
You will not feel that this period of time is very bitter, you will only obviously feel that you are improving, have been improving, and over time, you will enjoy this full and hard time.
I always feel that a life of full effort and self-discipline is happy, even if the current pressure is very high and things are very cumbersome, but when I think of the brightness of the future, I will be happy from the heart.
Happiness in the future can also be the source of happiness now.
4. The more bitter you are, the more you have to remind yourself to be happy
I am a positive pessimist.
Specifically, when I am a little proud of my life, I will remind myself a little pessimistically that "life is not so smooth, pay attention, be low-key, work hard with humility, and be careful of overturning";
When I feel that "everything is very hard", I will give myself a positive psychological hint that "life will not always be at the bottom, just like a parabola, if you feel that the road is getting more and more difficult, then congratulations, you are on the left curve, you are progressing, you will slowly approach your brilliant point".
When everyone is actively looking at a thing, I choose to be pessimistic and restrained; when everyone is negative about a thing, I choose to be positive. That's one of the guidelines by which I look at a lot of things.
Don't think of suffering as suffering; don't treat happiness as pleasure.
So, when I feel happy, in order to continue this happiness, I will do something that seems to be hard, but the hard work at this time will not feel bitter; when I feel hard, I will look at this hard work with a positive attitude, remind myself that the more unhappy the time, the happier I am, the more we must have a positive attitude, the more positive the mentality will lead us to where we want to be, and the days will slowly get better.
When you are sad, remember to try to make yourself a little happier, this is the law of good luck in life.
Maybe you don't have a happy way, but if you want to hold on to this period of time, if you want to come to Jitai, then you better think positively about everything and have a lot of fun and laughter.
Sometimes it is not just to make us happy, but also to let life let those things that are difficult for us to see, we are a resilient person, you can't beat us.
Sometimes, our strong bravery and happiness are also given by ourselves. They are never character-driven.
I recently suddenly realized a truth, there are always some people around us, maybe the current conditions and opportunities are less than us, may be worse than our current situation, but they always maintain their own rhythm, work hard, happy life, three years later, five years later, ten years later, they will not be worse than us.
There are always people who are worse off than us, worse than us, and have a better future than we are. Of course, if we don't have that kind of person around us for a while, then let's try to become such a person.
Now, I am also slowly becoming a long-termist, I do not care about the temporary gains and losses, I do not care whether the current life is a little harder, or a little sad, as long as I believe that "all the efforts I have made at this moment are making me a little better in the future", I can work hard happily.
For most of us, we are qualified to choose this kind of bittersweet pleasure. Life is not as bad as we think, as long as you are really working well, improving your skills, earning money, and saving money. To believe in the power of time.
It's not really that we live without happiness, sometimes we just forget to choose happiness.
For example, it is very happy to work hard for one thing, it is very happy to work hard to complete a job, it is very happy to buy a box of ice cream at a convenience store, it is very happy to eat fish balls, it is very happy to eat a delicious takeaway, the night scene after work late at night is very beautiful, the new collection of a cute emoji is very happy, it is very happy to find a good show, it is very happy to sleep until it wakes up naturally on the weekend, and it is very happy to eat hot pot with friends after busy work...
Finally, I wish you happiness.
If there is no great happiness, then I wish you many, many small blessings.