Text/Lucky Online Contributing Author Non also
Recently, the media broke the news that "the big s divorced Wang Xiaofei".
And Wang Xiaofei deleted all the dynamics related to big s on social platforms. Also change the note to "Xiao Yue'er her father".
Recalling that before Jiang Hongjie and Fukuhara Ai divorced, Jiang Hongjie also changed the remarks to "father of two children" for the first time. One can't help but wonder if this is a prelude to an official divorce.
The two also appeared together on the celebrity couple reality show "Happiness Trio" more than 2 years ago, and the sweet interaction in the show is vividly remembered, but now it is not human. It really responds to the saying "Xiu'en loves to die fast".
why? Because the show is a magnifying glass, it will infinitely magnify the good and bad in the relationship. This is especially true for celebrity couples. After all, real marriages often don't stand up to scrutiny. Once it is true, even the smallest thing can be devastating.
This is particularly prominent in the relationship between Wang Xiaofei and Big S.
Before meeting Wang Xiaofei, the big S was recognized as a cruel person in the entertainment industry, known as a chivalrous woman, and a gentle appearance.
After graduating from Huagang Art School at the age of 17, he debuted with his sister Xiao s group and became popular with a song "Ten Minutes of Love".
However, because there is no background, everything has to be done by oneself. From makeup and fitting clothes, docking the performance process, to terminating contracts and signing contracts, no one can rely on. But she never flinched. He even gave himself the English name "tiger".
When I first debuted, I had to make three records a year. She can only read while grasping all the time after class to write scripts for the show and practice the songs she wants to record.
When filming "Meteor Garden", I filmed during the day, hosted the variety show "Entertainment 100%" with Xiao S at night, and turned upside down every day and night, and I couldn't sleep for several hours. Often the crew has just finished and returned to the TV station to do live broadcasting. If you encounter traffic jams, run straight over.
In order to maintain a beautiful image, there is no less tossing. For example, rejecting any food containing melanin, eating only one banana a day for several weeks, and not allowing anyone to touch her hair, not even her boyfriend.
Her ruthlessness is also reflected in her attitude towards feelings.
In her twenties, she wrote a song about love. The lyrics were banned for being too shocking.
I can help you get rid of the people you hate/even the you pull/I can take a big gulp...
So, it's not hard to understand why she would warn her brother-in-law in front of everyone at the wedding ceremony of The Little S that if she is not good for the little S, she will find the underworld to break your leg.
At that time, everyone was curious about what kind of people could control her. After all, she is not only ruthless, but also made it clear in the interview that she has no expectations for marriage and only wants to work hard to earn money for the elderly.
However, in September 2010, after meeting Wang Xiaofei at a dinner party, everything changed.
They had been married in lightning less than two months, and when the news broke, almost no one was optimistic.
She herself had said that she didn't believe in love at first sight and thought it was silly. However, reason like hers could not escape the arrangement of fate. Before Wang Xiaofei met her, she was also full of scandals, and many big beauties had passed on gossip. The most famous is Zhang Yuqi.
For this fate, Wang Xiaofei has publicly stated:
After the two got married, the eldest son completely reversed his previous habits in order to have children. The figure was also visibly rounded up to the naked eye. When the second child was born, he almost died in the delivery room because of heavy bleeding.
But she was still firmly pregnant with her third child. Such a bridge, if there is no love, no one will believe.
After marriage, Big S was almost in a semi-reclusive state in order to take care of the children. However, with its high popularity, every move is still widely concerned. In addition, Wang Xiaofei originally liked to mix the entertainment circle and sent Weibo as a circle of friends.
At that time, he gave people the deepest impression of pure Beijing grandfathers, very straight and rigid, very loving wife.
Every time the big s was questioned, he was always the first to stand up and clarify.
For example, big S said in the show that "a woman must not peel shrimp by herself", which caused many people to say that she was too much.
It was he who stood up for the first time and shrugged it back: "Think about who is not normal." Isn't a normal relationship between men and women supposed to make their women happy, spoiled, and occasionally tested?
However, when the whole story is put down under the lens of the reality show, people can't help but wonder how sincere and a little false this is.
Even if the people of Zaimu look at their daily life, they will feel very depressed.
From eating to eating, to dealing with people, contradictions are everywhere.
When eating, the big s can't stop eating. Wang Xiaofei saw it and carefully reminded: "Wife, it is not very healthy to eat like this." ”
Big S immediately sank his face: "What do you want me to do?" I don't eat you have to say, I eat, and you think I eat too much. What do you really want me to do? ”
When he went to Chen Jianbin's house as a guest and drank a few sips of wine, his temper immediately came up, and he was fierce in front of many people.
Parenting is more divided.
As a Beijing grandfather, Wang Xiaofei felt that boys could not cry. When the big s saw it, he immediately stopped drinking: "Wang Xiaofei, you shut me up." ”
Many details show that Wang Xiaofei is more accommodating to the big s. But from time to time, he has to make some moths to prove that he is not really willing.
Of course, having contradictions does not mean that marriage is necessarily unhappy.
As long as Wang Xiaofei understands, respects, and loves Big S as he shows, it is not too much to do anything. It's like Qin Hailu and Wang Xinjun, playing The Proud Lady at home every day, aren't they also willing to fight one and one to be beaten?
However, once the contradictions accumulate and are not properly handled, they will consume love little by little.
So what exactly is the quarrel between Big S and Wang Xiaofei? Maybe it is related to the Sina Weibo released by Wang Xiaofei in the early morning of June 5.
At 1:15 a.m., Wang Xiaofei posted: "Everyone has a sincere heart, they have been constantly using and slandering, they have seen it over the years, and they really can't stand it, according to my Beijinger's words, I must remember this in the history books." ”
Originally, the geographical problem was stuck in a hurdle between them.
Big S once complained on Weibo that the weather in Beijing was too dry. Therefore, within a few years of marriage, she returned to Taipei with her two children. Wang Xiaofei could only run from both ends of Beijing and Taiwan.
For traditional Beijing men, it is inevitable that there will be complaints in their hearts.
As the saying goes, freezing three feet is not a day's cold. Their marriage had long been rifted, but there was love to balance before. But when the accumulated contradictions of each day outweigh the happy memories, the relationship is bound to be out of balance.
More than half a year has passed since the divorce scandal came out in June.
Once high-profile, they invariably chose silence. It also raises the suspicion that maybe a divorce is really coming. After all, a person's personality cannot suddenly change so much. However, it is not ruled out, because of the epidemic, the careers of Big S and Wang Xiaofei have been blocked, and the pressure of life is too great to be rumored.
After all, life is your own. They don't have to account to anyone.
Moreover, with the Xu family's consistent attitude towards marriage, two children will be the biggest weakness of Big S. But she is not Little S, nor is she Xu's mother. Under her gentle and gentle appearance, there lived a man's heart. And it is not difficult to find that she has always been the main backbone of the 4 women of the Xu family.
She has never been a traditional little woman, a real big heroine, a shancai dish.
From marriage to having children, although he has not worked much, it seems that he has married a rich and idle wife. In fact, she has been dominating the direction of marriage in her own way. Every time there is a problem with Wang Xiaofei's company or his family, it is the big s who stand up and contribute.
This time, it is no exception. Where their marriage will go is all in her mind.
Whether it is far away or not, I believe that she has her own considerations. In fact, this is true for anyone, even a marriage with many holes, if you want to, you can bring it back to life. The key is whether you are willing to put in the effort.
If you don't want to run a business, even if it is a small problem, it can be a reason for divorce. If it is intended to be maintained, even the biggest differences can be reconciled.
As a bystander, do you still hope that they can reconcile, after all, how many people can meet love at first sight?
The fact that their marriage turned out to be like this illustrates two problems.
First, love is not a guarantee of marital happiness.
Psychology believes that for people who are hurt inside, love is a traumatic need. That is to say, we are always involuntarily attracted to people who can satisfy some kind of lack in our hearts.
The big S of heaven and earth fell in love with Wang Xiaofei, a straight man of steel, but because they were also born in a single-parent family, they were forced to learn to be independent early and felt sorry for each other.
However, such pathological attachment can deteriorate as the individual grows. By that day, love will be gone. Of course, if you are fortunate enough to meet people who are consistent with your own emotional views, you can also be healed or healed by each other.
But it is naïve to think that as long as there is love, marriage must be happy, and they are not necessarily related.
Second, conflict is the bellwether for whether marriage lasts.
Even the best marriage has all kinds of problems. Especially when it goes wrong and then looks back. If you hold on to the problem, you can only report peace without marriage and infertility.
There are 1,000 ways for 1,000 couples to get along, but a good marriage has a commonality that is an attitude toward conflict.
There are many irreconcilable contradictions between Big S and Wang Xiaofei. As long as we can tolerate each other and do not touch the bottom line, we can be at peace. Their 10 years together is the best proof.
However, if you encounter contradictions that are difficult to reconcile, no matter how much warmth you have, you may be crushed in an instant. Now, they're stuck here. If you can survive, the relationship between the two people will inevitably be more intimate. If you can't survive it, you can only regret it.
In short, there is no terrible conflict, afraid of not being able to deal with it properly, and even making a fuss.
What do you think?
I am Pan Xingzhi, your personal emotional counselor. If you need professional help, write to me privately and know how to help you through the emotional crisis.