There must be life and death, and the great philosopher Goethe once said: Those who can connect the beginning and the end of life are the happiest. But because of the joy of life, how many people can accept death calmly, and even take the initiative to ask for the end of their lives under certain circumstances?
As an independent female representative, Hong Huang has experienced three marriages, but has not had her own biological children, about her later life, she once confessed: if she is old and will be sent to a nursing home, she would rather die.
What kind of experience made her feel this way, and maybe all this has to start from her life past.
In 1961, Hong Huang was born in no. 51 Courtyard of Shijia Hutong. Shijia Hutong, as one of the most famous hutongs in Beijing, has lived here countless celebrities, experienced countless major events that can change China's national fortunes, and has always had a hutong, half Of China.
Hong Huang was born here, naturally not by coincidence, but because her mother, Zhang Hanzhi's adoptive father, was the owner of No. 51 Courtyard, Zhang Shizhao.
Hong Huang has a prominent family lineage, his mother Zhang Hanzhi is known as one of the "five golden flowers" of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs, and once served as Chairman Mao's English teacher, and his biological father, Hong Junyan, was a famous talent when he was young, and after graduation, he became a professor at Peking University and was an authority on American issues.
After Zhang Hanzhi and Hong Junyan broke down, she married Qiao Guanhua, who was then the minister of foreign affairs, and the two did not have children after marriage, and Hong Huang became Qiao Guanhua's stepdaughter.
Born in such a family, Hong Huang enjoyed the best education of the same period, and after graduating from Shijia Hutong Elementary School, she was given the opportunity to study abroad at the age of 12, and her destination was New York, USA.
In 1984, after completing his studies in the United States, Hong Huang chose to stay in the United States and joined a consulting company.
Hong Huang's company, mainly for other enterprises to provide consulting services, but also responsible for coordinating import and export trade matters, because of work reasons, Hong Huang returned to China in 1991, fully responsible for the company's import and export business in China.
At that time, Hong Huang had just turned 30 years old, which could be said to be a successful career, but Hong Huang resigned from all positions soon after, because according to her, the role of comprador played intentionally or unintentionally made her very depressed.
Hong Huang has an enviable family history and education, but he cannot avoid the choices in life, these choices are the root of all troubles, and being able to question his own choices is the beginning of growth.
During that difficult time, the marriage with Chen Kaige may be Hong Huang's only consolation.
In 1986, Hong Huang met Chen Kaige, who was studying in the United States, which made her feel for the first time a different color in her life.
At that time, Chen Kaige had just divorced his first wife, and Hong Huang had also ended his first marriage, and the two wounded souls came together because of too much in common with each other.
Hong Huang once recalled that marriage in front of the media: in her eyes, Chen Kaige was a very attractive man, and everything in his place would become interesting.
Hong Huang and Chen Kaige began living together shortly after they met, and registered their marriage in New York in 1989.
But perhaps because Chen Kaige is too dazzling, so that he attracts too many people, Hong Huang is not satisfied with such a relationship, the contradictions between the two are increasing, and their marriage finally came to an end two years later.
There was a marriage after Hong Huang, but like the previous two times, it did not last long, and the prominent birth did not bring Hong Huang too much happiness, but it brought her a different life experience prematurely.
After Qiao Guanhua's death in 1983, his mother Zhang Hanzhi became alone again. The misfortune of two generations left a deep impression on Hong Huang, and she began to enjoy a life of solitude, focusing on her career and not caring what outsiders said.
Interesting souls are always lonely, perhaps because of the mother's experience, Hong Huang's attitude toward marriage from the beginning, is very cold, which is why Hong Huang hastily started and ended every marriage.
Hong Huang did not have high expectations for marriage, she did not expect marriage to change her life, marriage was just a footnote in life for her.
Without the bondage of the family, Hong Huang's life is particularly free, and her parents have become her only bondage. Her mother, Zhang Hanzhi, is a retired cadre, and she does not need To worry about Hong Huang in her later years, all she can do is to visit her mother from time to time.
Before Zhang Hanzhi's death, he had repeatedly expressed to Hong Huang that he hoped to be buried next to the tomb of his adoptive father Zhang Shizhao after death, but Hong Huang always felt that he was coming to Japan for a long time and advised his mother not to think wildly.
But everything came so suddenly, in 2008, Zhang Hanzhi died of illness, and was buried next to her adoptive father's tomb according to her last wishes, and she was buried with two strands of silver wire of Qiao Guanhua.
Although the relationship between her biological father, Hong Junyan, and her mother, was reluctant to mention the past too much, after her mother's death, her biological father became Hong Huang's only living relative, and she often visited her biological father in a nursing home in Hong Kong.
Hong moved to Hong Kong after his retirement and started a new family there, but his old age was not happy and he had to wait for death in a cramped nursing home.
Hong Huang saw the embarrassing situation of his biological father and offered to change to a nursing home with better conditions for him, but he was hindered by Hong Junyan's current family, and the coordination failed hong huang, and he could only choose to accept this result.
She spent her last days with her father, a process that was both a torture for Hong Junyan and a torment for Hong Huang.
Because of this experience, Hong Huang panicked about her later life, for her, if she lived in such a repressive environment, she would rather die.
Hong Huang's experience doomed her not to be a person who would easily compromise with life, and for the imperfections in life, she would fight for resistance but would never bend over backwards.
Compared with the happiness in the eyes of others, she values her own feelings more, and not being bound by the world is her attitude to life.
Life is nothing more than an intermediary for us to realize our values, and as Confucius said, it is possible to die at the end of the day.
Or try to realize your own value, which has nothing to do with age, if you don't want time to waste in meaninglessness, then give it meaning, make your life meaningful.
To live is to be the master of life, not to succumb to the slaves of life.
Most of us do not have the eminent life of Hong Huang, and do not have the confidence to compete with life, but this does not mean that we have to succumb to life, end our life in a long way, make our lives full of fun, and give life real meaning.