When it comes to listening to lectures, we naturally think of when we go to school. The teacher speaks on the podium, and we sit down to listen, or take notes, or do questions, until the end of the final exam, but more often, the content of this course begins from the moment we walk out of the examination room, and there is very little left, which is the result of most of us passively taking classes in the test-oriented educational environment.
Of course, there are also some courses that we take the initiative to learn. For example, the various learning platforms, communities, and work-related courses we learn in order to enhance our competitiveness are now the ways to obtain knowledge and information to better adapt to society, improve the quality of life, and realize the value of our lives.
And the lesson I'm talking about today is a bit heavy, a lesson that most of us would avoid or even dare to listen to.
This lesson is a compulsory course for each of us, and it is a discussion of "big questions" about death, aging, regret, forgiveness, meaning of life, etc.
In this life class, there is only one old man, one young man, and there is no need for books in the class, the class location is still at home, and the class time is fixed - every Tuesday
This lesson comes from a book, Meet Tuesday.
The book "Meet Tuesday" is a true story.
Morrie, a professor of social psychology in his seventies, was diagnosed with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, Known as Lou Glick's disease, in 1994. It is a sinister and relentless neurological disease, and, frighteningly, it is an incurable disease.
After a year of "spending time" with his illness, Morrie passed away, and his proud protégé, Mickey, the author of the book, spent fourteen weeks with the old professor on his sickbed, listening to his last teachings every Tuesday, and compiling his teacher's striking proverbs into this book after his death, named "Meet Tuesday".
Mitch Albom, the author of "Meet Tuesday," is a well-known American columnist, radio host, television commentator, and active charity activist. To date, he has published nine books, including Five People You Met in Heaven, One Day Reborn, and best-selling books such as The Documentary Meet Tuesday.
"Meet Tuesday" can be said to be a miracle of the book publishing industry in recent years, it stayed on the national best-seller list for four years, translated into thirty-one languages including Chinese, and sold more than 11 million copies worldwide.
The reason why everyone should listen to this lesson is because it is a lesson to re-examine themselves, a compulsory lesson in life, and a lesson to reveal the meaning of life.
First, this lesson allows us to re-examine ourselves and live thoroughly.
Yu Qiuyu said in the preface to the Chinese edition of the book that the people who are qualified to talk about life should be the elderly, especially the elderly who do not come much, because they have a strong sense of farewell and will have a transcendent bird's-eye view of life.
Morrie is such a person. With the help of Mickey's words, we feel the extraordinary mental energy of the old man in the close confrontation with death, in order to re-examine our own lives.
Morrie believes that American educational culture is misguided—it does not encourage people to think about really big problems, but attracts people to pay attention to a lot of practical trivia, such as schooling, exams, promotions, employment, making money, buying a house, buying a car, etc., all to survive. And people are not used to looking at themselves within such a frame of thinking: Is this all I need in my life? Or is this "need" the life I really "want"?
In the beginning of the book, the author Mickey talks about how his life changed after the death of his uncle. He began to work hard, pursue achievement, accumulate wealth, which may be his fear of death, but later, in his conversation with Morrie, he found that his original direction of life was wrong, and Morrie told him that to make life meaningful, you have to dedicate yourself to love, to the group around you, to create a kind of value that can give you goals and values.
For those of us who live in Chinese culture, why are we not forced to live by a lot of practical trivia?
We also need to look at our own lives:
1. Is the life you want now? Or, what kind of life do you want to live? 2. Where is the gap between reality and ideal life? 3. Can such a gap be changed? Change where you can change. 4. What do you need to do for places that can be changed? 5. Set goals, start with small goals, and change slowly, this is the power of action.
For example, if you feel that the state of life between you and your lover is not what you want, then objectively and rationally analyze the reasons, or find a third party such as a friend to help analyze and examine your married life in the analysis. Only by really looking at it and reflecting on it can you make a real change and you can live the life you want.
Second, this lesson is a compulsory course in our lives, and it allows us to reread life.
The lesson Morrie gave to Mickey was all about attitudes and thoughts about life. Topics such as the world, death, regret, family, feelings, the eternity of love, goodbye, etc., these themes (big questions) are exactly what each of us should seriously think about, even if our culture does not advocate thinking about these, but, in my opinion, only by thinking clearly about these big problems and seeing them clearly, the small problems in my life will be solved.
As Morrie put it, "Everyone knows they're going to die, but nobody wants to believe it." If we believe in this fact, we will react differently", and "once you learn how to die, you will learn how to live".
It can be seen that we have figured out the big question of "death", and we have figured out how to live, and this is exactly what we need to think about in our life experience.
Death, a word that we are afraid of, is reluctant to be mentioned, let alone dare to face it, but when we recognize that death is the inevitability of everyone and accept this reality, we can better arrange the rest of our lives. It's just that many of us don't want to think about death.
"This is because, most of us live in dreams," Morrie said. We're not really experiencing the world, we're in a state of confusion, doing what we think we should do."
And when we really learn to die, we learn to live. Because we know that our lives are finite, we need to spend our limited time on what we think is most important.
In addition to his understanding of the big question of "death," Morrie gives us an understanding of "forgiveness."
Morrie said, "Forgive yourself before you die, and then forgive others." Forgiveness is the liberation of the heart, but also the reconciliation with oneself, and even more the peace with life.
And making peace with life is the most difficult thing in life, and Morrie has done it. He forgave his harsh attitude toward his friends and forgave what he should have done but didn't. Because in Morrie's view, we don't have to be in a mood of regret all the time and can't extricate ourselves, which is not good for us.
Yes, in reality, how do we resolve our deep complaints or regrets? Can I forgive? The hurt at the time disappointed you, but over time, your feelings will change. Those you care about and care about will always be in your heart. And forgiveness, in my opinion, should not be done before death. Because at that time, I had no chance.
Therefore, to make peace with life as early as possible is to reconcile with ourselves, which is very important for our future lives.
Third, this lesson discusses the meaning of life and reveals the essential meaning of life.
Morrie used his own experience to teach this lesson on the meaning of life, showing us how an old man who is about to die faces the big problems of life and death, aging, culture, family, and love, and these contents also reveal the essential meaning of our lives.
In Morrie's view, love is both the meaning of life and the essential meaning of life.
In the book, there are many statements about love, such as "love or death" and "love wins." Love is always the winner.
"Love is the only rational act." "The most important thing in life is to learn how to give love to others and to receive love."
"Without love, we become birds with broken wings." It can be seen that Morrie pays attention to love, and he dedicates love, to love, as the meaning of life.
When he learned of his illness, he decided to "face death bravely" because he wanted to "study my slow and patient death process." Observe what happens to me. Learn something from me", this is Morrie's love for us.
Morrie accepts death, and at the same time he does not see death as a sad thing, because there is love in his heart, he says, "I may be dying, but I am surrounded by people who love me and care about me." How many people can have this blessing? ”
Morrie also tells us what the meaning of life is, "If you want to make your life meaningful, you have to dedicate yourself to love, to the community around you, to create a value that gives you purpose and meaning."
It can be seen that love is giving. In the book The Art of Love, Fromm points out that the essence of love is to give.
"Giving is happier than receiving, not because it is a deprivation, but because it manifests my life's existence in the act of giving." - "The Art of Love"
This statement coincides with Morrie's statement that both "the existence of life" and "the meaning of life" stem from love.
So, how do we love, how do we dedicate ourselves to love?
First, we need to learn self-love. Because only those who love themselves can love others better.
Second, we need to develop our ability to love. For love is a person's active ability, an ability to unite himself with others.
Finally, we need to have great love.
"If you love yourself, you will love everyone else as much as you love yourself. As long as you love others less than you love yourself, you will not truly love yourself, but if you love all others equally, including yourself, you will love them as if you were loving someone who is both God and human. Such a person is a great and righteous man who loves himself and loves all others as well. —Eckhart
This lesson not only allowed us to examine ourselves and life, reread life, but also let us find the meaning of life. In order to live better, we need to learn the content of this lesson for a lifetime, but at the same time, we can complete this life compulsory lesson as soon as possible by reading the book "Meet Tuesday".
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