Just this past eleven holidays, who are the strangers you know best?
In the eyes of White Duck Teacher, it is Wu Jing.
Front foot Wu Qianli just in "Changjin Lake" melee, back foot Ma Renxing in "My Father and Me" galloping, even on the social software to send a meme is "Chinese" Wu Jing.
Not long ago, Wu Jing, who debuted for twenty-five years, finally exceeded 20 billion yuan in the cumulative box office of the movies he starred in.
As everyone's interest in Wu Jing grew, the woman behind him, Xie Nan, also entered people's field of vision.
It's just that unlike people's imagination, Xie Nan is not the kind of woman who pays silently behind a successful man and teaches her husband and children, but a woman who shines with an independent spirit and an interesting soul.
01 Interesting soul pick one
As we all know, Wu Jing is severe "straight male cancer".
At the stage when the two were not even friends, Wu Jingquan directly asked Xie Nan three fatal questions on the show:
Are you married?
Do you have a boyfriend?
What do you belong to?
Wu Jing's caught off guard by this three consecutive questions made the interview directly turn into a blind date scene. Not only that, but there is also a story that is widely circulated:
Once, Wu Jing asked Xie Nan what perfume he had sprayed. When he learned that the name of the perfume was "Encounter", Wu Jing blurted out a sentence of male and female tears:
"Is it to meet me?"
Straight men are hard and the most deadly.
Women who can control such straight men are certainly not ordinary people. Looking at the first two episodes of the third season of "Happiness Trio", wu jing and Xie Nan's "drama essence" daily life is everywhere.
When entering the village, Wu Jing carried two large bags of food with an umbrella. Xie Nan said mischievously, you carry the burden, I hold you. Wu Jing immediately picked up the stem: Second master sister, lead the way.
Wu Jing was a little uncomfortable, Xie Nan gave him medicine, opened his mouth and came: "Da Lang, drink the medicine." ”
Wu Jing also cooperated, and said with an innocent face: "Golden Lotus, my silver is under the bed." ”
Next door, Guo Jingfei sang a song "Cinderella" with his wife playing guitar. "You are so beautiful, and you are so lovely. How can I get hooked on you, I'm asking myself. ”
Xie Nan was envious, hated the iron and steel and said: The same husband, you see how people are romantic?!
Wu Jing said, what is this, isn't it a song? I can sing too! So a serious book stood up: "I am your father is really great." Raise you so big, you are not obedient, go to play all day long. ”
Cleaning in the house, Xie Nan found a small bottle, she was curious about what it was, she went to screw the lid, and finally accidentally, the lid fell off, and the toothpicks inside were scattered on the ground, it turned out to be a toothpick bottle.
Ordinary people may clean up the toothpicks, but Xie Nan has a plan, she packs up the toothpicks and packs them back into the bottle, and then pretends not to open the bottle, letting Wu Jing twist it, in fact, she wants to see Wu Jing scatter the toothpicks on the ground.
Unexpectedly, Wu Jing was not deceived, and carefully opened the lid, and the toothpick was not sprinkled at all.
Xie Nan was particularly disappointed, and Wu Jing summed it up triumphantly: "Life should be careful everywhere, it has entered my subconscious." ”
Xie Nan was proud again: "This is a person who has been digging a pit by me for many years." ”
It can be seen that the daily life of these two couples is to dig pits for each other, play tricks on each other, and live a life of hip-hop.
American psychologist Miles once mentioned in the book "Social Psychology" that there should be "passionate love" between husband and wife, and it is even more necessary to develop "accompanying love".
What is Passionate Love? That is the strong emotional fluctuations caused by the romantic love between two people in the early stage of the relationship. But this mood swing can only last for 2 years at most, and if the marriage is only sustained by passionate love, it will fall apart for at most 2 years.
Therefore, Miles suggests that everyone should develop a "companion love", which can stand the test of time and become a stable and warm love.
How will "companionship love" develop?
Miles proposed a "reward theory of attraction": people associate happy scenes with the people around them, and then become more attached to the people around them.
If you and your partner can play together, then you can have countless good memories, you climb mountains together, cook together, watch sunrises together, watch movies together...
That in his heart, all the good memories are related to you, you are synonymous with happiness, and his attachment to you will become deeper and deeper. Couples who can play together are the power to nourish their feelings in the company day after day.
A lifetime is so long, there must be a lot of boring moments, your partner is your best playmate, your likes are always responded to, and everything you want to do is accompanied by someone, such a marriage can always maintain a charming freshness. As long as a couple can still play together, they are bound to have similar interests, and life can always remain fresh.
02 Iron Man tenderness, the most deadly
Wu Jing's behavior of constantly "testing on the edge of crime" can be fully included in the "Contemporary Men's Negative Teaching Materials for Flirting with Sisters" today.
But somehow, after getting familiar with the daily life of their husband and wife, you will sincerely sigh: true incense.
In reality TV shows, other husbands are well versed in the principle of survival and have voluntarily lost to their wives in the guessing boxing link. Wu Jing, who had thick lines, held the determination of "the first in the game, the second in life", and was stunned to win the game on the stone scissors cloth.
Xie Nan, who had lost, had to carry her own luggage, and before she could get up, Wu Jing took the lead in accepting punishment for his wife.
You see, Wu Jing, who practices machismo all the time, actually has learned to perceive his wife's uneasy side.
In the swing link, if the rope is cut, Xie Nan will fly out and fall on the paved cushion. Although there would be no danger, Wu Jing on the side was extremely nervous.
So that the moment Xie Nan fell, Wu Jing, whose legs were injured, would instinctively rush up and catch his wife before she landed.
Wu Jing is like those silly straight male husbands in life. They are not good at expressing themselves, but they practice their love for their wives in action. Xie Nan said: Although my husband is a tough guy, he is definitely not the kind of person who is tough. Xie Nan also gave Wu Jing a nickname: Iron Bone Xiaogongju.
For example, in the field recording program, know that she is allergic, so bring her a good sunscreen, but also afraid that she will be bitten by mosquitoes, busy pointing wormwood to repel mosquitoes, asleep and confused is also asking: "Wife, mosquitoes bite you?" ”
His wife did not come home, although he was most afraid of light when he slept, he also had to leave a lamp for his wife:
On the fourth anniversary of marriage, I sent a WeChat message to my wife and said: "Thank you for marrying me."
He even took the initiative to apply for Xie Nan to control the economic power of the family.
"He's a thoughtful person, but he's not considerate in terms of language, he's doing it very well." Xie Nan said.
(Mr. Wu has laughed into a flower)
There are three things in this world that cannot be hidden, poverty, coughing and love, and the more you try to hide, the more you will want to cover up.
Many girls like to ask a question, "Teacher Bai, does he really like me, or is he just playing?" "In fact, it is very simple to judge whether a boy has you in his heart, that is, to carefully taste from the details, whether he has achieved the heart of you."
Even boys who are not good at expressing themselves will express their love to you in actual actions, such as being more concerned about your feelings, remembering what you like to eat, what you like to play, etc. If a person loves you, many details are visible to you.
03 A good marriage cannot be without a sense of proportion
Even when filming, Wu Jing also knows the "sense of proportion".
The script of the participating film will check whether there is a kiss scene for Xie Nan in advance, and if the kiss scene is suddenly added on the set, it will also report to his wife truthfully:
When "Wolf Warrior 2" was filmed, one day I was working in the field, and he called me and said, "Daughter-in-law, I told you something, today the heroine kissed me." ”
I said, "Huh? I don't remember this on the script? What's the situation? ”
He said, "It's the mood of filming is there, the heroine plays on the spot, you don't mind." "It's that the girl in the play likes him, and he just saved her from the helicopter, and the heroine added a kissing scene when she was emotional, and I thought it was reasonable and good."
Being able to say so frankly, "I think it's quite reasonable, very good", this kind of proposition is really Wu Jing's style of speaking.
And Xie Nan's kissing scene is, after all, a hurdle that Wu Jing has difficulty crossing in this life.
Xie Nan's first play in his life, there was an unavoidable "kiss scene", Wu Jing learned about it, innocently and sadly begged: "Can't you talk to the director?" Why do you have to kiss? ”
Before Xie Nan filmed the kiss scene that night, he received a call from Wu Jing:
Where are you?
I'm in the group.
Did you shoot it?
Not yet.
Then you come out.
After Xie Nan went out, he only saw Wu Jing, who had come to visit the class, dressed in white, obviously carefully prepared by the stylist.
He walked in front of Xie Nan with grief and kissed his daughter-in-law lightly:
"Then you go shoot, you look at that actor, is I attractive enough?!"
Whether a man loves you hot or not, just look at how "childish" he is in front of you.
It is said that in love, men have a sense of boundaries, which is the greatest sense of security for women.
Henry Crowder, an American marriage columnist, said: "The best way to judge crossing the line is whether your actions have hurt the other half of your marriage." ”
A man who cares about his partner's feelings will maintain a sense of boundaries even if he has a good relationship with the opposite sex.
Zhu Yawen in "Beishang Guang does not believe in tears" is a crazy and debauched man, and in real life, he only cares about his wife, not only refuses to pick up the female host when he is on the variety show.
Filming also respects the feelings of his wife, as an actor, it is inevitable that some scenes are too intimate, as long as the wife feels unacceptable, he chooses not to shoot. After getting married, he no longer eats alone with young women, and occasionally wants to eat with old friends of the opposite sex, and he will definitely report to his wife.
You see, if you really love someone, you naturally know how to avoid suspicion. He will take the initiative to ask for your consent and will naturally distance himself from the opposite sex because it is a value and protection of the relationship.
Marriage may not give you a sense of security, but people can. If you are lucky, from time to time wandering, deserting, or overconfident in your own loyalty and morality, wandering on the edge of the "boundary", although this may not necessarily represent anything, but the trust and respect between husband and wife will be exhausted in the crossing of the line again and again.
A truly strong marriage should be that I stick to the bottom line of "morality" and never abandon you. You cling to the power of "feelings" and cherish them in awe.
04 Respect each other and support each other
In Xie Nan's eyes: If you describe the relationship between two people, the word "comrade-in-arms" is the most appropriate, not only trusting but also heartfelt.
After all, marrying Wu Jing is a matter of courage.
Wu Jing learned martial arts from an early age, shooting various martial arts films, and his body was injured: ligament cracking, concussion, eye injury, thumb being cut off...
Xie Nan did not hesitate to marry, a big deal, and pushed his wheelchair for the rest of his life.
Unexpectedly, at the wedding, Wu Jing really appeared on crutches. At that time, the wedding was prepared by Xie Nan alone, and she told Wu Jing that she only needed to be present on the day of the wedding.
As a result, when filming, Wu Jing broke his leg. Looking at Wu Jing, who slowly entered on crutches, Xie Nan was very understanding, and the wedding was even more affectionate:
"I want to be able to make you happy when you're hard and tired, and be the only person who supports you when no one supports you."
While the whole world is cheering for you, I want to silently applaud and be proud of you in the corner.
So you don't have to promise me too much, you just try to rush forward, come on, there's me at home. ”
At the wedding, Xie Nan really did it. Many people have probably heard this story.
During the filming of "Wolf Warrior 1", because no one invested, Wu Jing sold almost all his family property, and he made a desperate bet for the ideal, and his friends around him also poured cold water on him and made him give up.
But just when Wu Jing was alone and helpless, Xie Nan firmly said to him:
"You must stick to your dreams, even if you fail, we can start from scratch."
"If your dream can't be realized, even if we live in the best house, we will regret it for a lifetime."
"I still have a small house, and the movie is a big deal that I raised you."
It was this sentence "I raise you" that touched Wu Jing and gave him the courage to not hesitate.
Therefore, later, the double harvest of "Wolf Warrior 2" word of mouth and box office, some netizens asked, Wolf Warrior 2 achieved such a good result, who is the person who wants to thank the most?
Wu Jing replied without hesitation: My wife.
When you win, I stand behind you and silently applaud you;
When you lose, I accompany you to make a comeback.
They are husband and wife, but also comrades-in-arms.
For Xie Nan, Wu Jing also gave her a mountain-like dependence. He knew that his wife liked hosting, liked acting, had a high passion for his profession, and he respected and understood every choice Xie Nan made. When Xie Nan hopes to return to the family, he supports it; when Xie Nan wants to fight for his career, he says you go and swing it, and I take care of the family.
After Wu Jing entered the peak of her career with "Wolf Warrior", many viewers called on Xie Nan to be a xiannai helper, "obediently serve her husband and son at home, come out and make what movie", she did not humble her response, she was proud of her work.
This confidence was given by Wu Jing. In a talk show, Wu Jing said that he respected his wife and encouraged her to have her own career.
"I think it's good for girls, especially to have their own careers, not to be housewives, because your perspective will become narrower and narrower."
Not just lip service, Wu Jing also unconditionally supported in action.
When his wife was busy with work, Wu Jing cooked at home with a baby to eliminate Xie Nan's worries.
Some time ago, Xie Nan broke her leg and needed surgery, but she still wanted to go out to work, and was laughed at by netizens as a conscientious "hit worker". Although Wu Jing expressed his heartache, he did not use "because I am distressed" to stop his wife's work, but left the decision to his wife herself.
For Xie Nan, Wu Jing is her strong backing, and she does not have to become an affiliate of whom, or give up anything for whom.
She can also be Xie Nan, not just "Mrs. Wu".
Many netizens have asked online: Why can the two be so sweet after 8 years of marriage? What's the secret?
Wu Jing explained that the standard of a good husband is like "following a fart", understanding his wife's needs in real time, and accommodating and supporting her.
A good husband and wife relationship does not lie in the exact same interests, but as independent individuals, independent and closely connected to each other, can respect each other's individual differences, and can appreciate the different aspects of each other's life and work.
In marriage, a relationship where 1+1 is greater than 2 is a joy for everyone, and if 1+1 is less than 1, it will lose both ways.
As Gao Xiaosong said:
"Good feelings make us a better self, that pure self, sincere self, and honest self."
Yes, through the people we love, we can see a more complete self, and a larger world, and the right people, will progress together.
We are independent of each other, appreciate each other, grow each other, and then evenly match each other and go hand in hand, which is a kind of adult love that ripens and matures. May you also meet the man who depends on each other and achieves each other, and use his love to illuminate the rest of your life.
"In a lifetime, encountering love and encountering sex is not rare, what is rare is to meet understanding." Many years ago, Wu Jing, who was single, was very "hated to marry" and shouted various times on Weibo to find a girlfriend.
And Xie Nan never wanted to get married and have children, and he felt that it was good to be single for a lifetime.
In the end, the two of them got together and achieved a happy marriage. The program team asked them to rate each other, Wu Jing gave Xie Nan a score of 9.9, and Xie Nan gave Wu Jing a score of 7.
Wu Jing smiled and said that my wife was not satisfied with me. Xie Nan explained that we still have many years.
For the rest of your life, you can fall in love with the person next to you again and again, which is the best look of love. I hope that everyone can love happiness like Wu Jing Xie Nan.