The height of the parents is the starting point of the child, and the parent's vision determines the pattern of the child

Photo: The Adventures of Bettero and Vassekin

1

In the morning, seeing her sister in the circle of friends said that the network movie "Time and Space Delivery Man" that she wrote had been released, I couldn't help but sigh that my sister was really powerful, and I felt very surprised and proud in my heart, of course, there was a deep envy for her.

But when I looked back and threw myself into a busy day, I felt a pang of sadness for no reason. My sister pursued her dream in Beijing, but I stayed in this third-tier city and ran for mortgages, car loans and children's milk powder money every day, why is the gap between people so big?

When I was young, my uncle worked in the county seat, and my aunt taught at the primary school in the village. They also live in their hometown, and their uncle usually lives in the dormitory of the county town and returns to the village on weekends. My sister and I eat and drink the same, we play together, we study together, the academic performance is similar, and the world we see is the same. At that time, the gap between us was negligible and negligible.

Later, through hard work, my aunt was admitted to the central primary school in the town to teach, and my sister also went to the town primary school to study, and when the primary school graduated, my sister followed my uncle to the county town to go to school, and I still studied in the primary school in the village.

At the time of the college entrance examination, my sister took the art student, and my uncle chose the choreography major for her love of literature, and although I scored higher than her in the second year of the college entrance examination, I had to go to an ordinary college.

My parents didn't even know what choreography was, they only knew that the art exam required a lot of money, so they told me: if you can't pass the exam, don't go to school.

I had no choice but to study hard, but obviously, I couldn't get into the same school as my sister with my poor math and English.

Later, she stayed in Beijing to write the script, I stayed in the third-tier cities in my hometown as a clerk, and then her script was tens of thousands of yuan per episode, I had a salary of 3,000 yuan per month, and then she found a husband who opened a company, I found a company employee like herself to be a husband, and now her own script is released, my monthly salary is paid off the mortgage and car loan, and I work hard every day for my livelihood. That's how the gap widens little by little.

Although we cannot blame our parents, we must admit the fact that the height of parents is the starting point of the child, and the vision of the parents determines the pattern of the child.

2

Can the cowherds in the village and Wang Sicong have the same starting point? When he was struggling with which field to go to today to herd sheep, Wang Sicong took another piece of land with billions of dollars.

Can your child be compared to Huang Duoduo? Huang Duoduo walked the catwalk in Paris, wearing the fashion of internationally renowned brands, and you also bargained for a dress for half a day at the stall.

The height and vision of parents determine the environment in which children live, the education they receive, the friends they make, and indirectly the height they can reach.

But the end of my life's struggle is only the starting point of others, so what is the meaning of my struggle?

I once made the idea that if a child is a child, we are educationally a distance away from other parents by a tree, and when the child grows up, it may become a forest.

Comparing with Wang Sicong and Huang Duoduo, it is to make us realize the importance of the pattern and vision of our parents, but we cannot feel frustrated because of this, we cannot have self-doubt, but when we realize this truth, we will reduce the distance of a tree compared to our previous self, and when we get to the child, it may be the gap of the entire forest.

I remembered a passage from Mimon: At least the world acknowledges effort. As long as we work hard, we can start to improve from this generation. You are not Wang Sicong, but you can become Ma Yun.

So while frustrated, I can't stop because if I don't struggle, my kids will continue to look up to others. If I work harder, take my child to see more scenery, appreciate more world affairs, and give my child more room for choice, my child's life can have a different world. Vision and pattern determine how far a child can go, and I am his starting point.

If I work a little harder and my child starts a little higher, won't my child's dream be less elusive?

Therefore, we do not have to feel guilty that we cannot provide the best growth environment for our children, many things cannot be changed, so guilt is useless. As long as we are working hard for a better tomorrow, in order to improve ourselves and give our children a better growth platform and strive for this is the best love for children.

Some people may wonder: I think you are not right, there is a person in our village, his parents are also facing the loess and facing the sky, every day in the field to make a living, but he was admitted to Beijing as a civil servant, where he bought a house to marry a daughter-in-law and have children, their parents are different from our parents?

First of all, the probability of this kind of thing happening is relatively small, so a big boss of a civil servant in a village will cause a sensation in the whole village, become a topic that the whole village is talking about after tea and dinner, and it is also a template for parents to educate their children.

Second, his parents, though like yours, must have the same qualities that are unique to them. For example, some parents like to tell stories to their children after dinner, tell what they have seen and heard, children may be interested in writing, some parents like to take their children shopping, only ask only bargaining and not buying, children may have a talent for doing business, these qualities are not obvious, but the impact on children is subtle.

The type of people I hate the most is that no matter what I want to do, before I even start trying, I start to anticipate possible failures, and then I am too scared to try.

In this way, not only can you not raise your own height, but also give your child a negative impact, causing your child to cower and shrink when things go wrong, and dare not try.

3

When doing things, we must imagine all kinds of difficulties that may arise, but the purpose of this kind of thinking is to make things go more smoothly, to think carefully, to think well in advance of solutions, and not to be in a hurry when difficulties come.

So please be sure to seize every possible opportunity to try to improve yourself, but also to provide a good family education for your children, and take your children out to see a different life. Don't use the excuse that you are busy at work, have no time, and don't understand to avoid improving your ideological understanding.

You read articles on the WeChat public account every day, yesterday you read an article, realized that accusing children in public is not conducive to children's mental health, so you put up with criticizing children when relatives gathered, and waited until you got home to analyze things right or wrong for your children.

Today you read another article, saying that teaching by example is more important than words, when the child is writing homework, you resist the urge to play with the mobile phone, pick up a book to accompany you, you have improved a little.

You save money for smoking, take your child to a better restaurant on the weekends, teach him dining etiquette, or take your child on a tour and tell him to study hard and you can go further.

Look, family education is not as difficult and complicated as you think, as long as you want, you can make yourself different from yesterday's self, but this difference brings great changes to children.

Internalize the truths told by others into your own point of view, and then combine the reality of family education and apply it to children's education, the child's starting point is raised in your little improvement, and the child's pattern is also opened up little by little when your horizons are broadened.