Psychiatrist, are you there?

I have been thinking about this kind of article for a long time whether to write it or not, why do I ask so? Because I'm not a psychiatrist, I haven't studied psychology and I don't use technical terms to describe anything or even read a single book on psychology.

So why would I consider writing this type of article? Because I walked out of depression! Yes, I am a depressed person who has walked out of depression by some means! But I dare not say that it is completely out, because it will take time to verify. (I didn't go to the hospital for check-ups and medication because I didn't have the courage and my family thought I was making a fuss.

Although I don't understand the psychology of a psychologist, I know the psychology of depressed patients very well. I think it's important! I want to tell my story to everyone and I want to share with you the way I came out, and I hope that through what I write, I will help those who are like me! (This article is just some of my personal experiences and does not have any professional academic views)

A first encounter with depression

In retrospect, I should have had a tendency to be depressed a long time ago. We arrived early and just got married, and we lived with our mother-in-law at that time. The age-old problem between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law should be a key to depression. The trivialities of life pull my nerves tightly and seem to have no slackening, and every day when I come home from work downstairs, I have a feeling of not being able to breathe! I began to have the idea of escaping but having nowhere to escape, and I could only suppress myself!

Depression should begin with stress that cannot be cathartic. When the water is full, it overflows, and if the water that flows out is piled up in the heart all the time, it will drown itself!

2. Mired in an emotional quagmire

Later when I was pregnant, I miscarried twice for physical reasons, which was a heavy blow to me! Even though I knew that the embryos had no hope of developing normally, I stubbornly asked the doctor to protect the fetus for me, and I kept changing hospitals and doctors to keep an embryo that was no longer developing. I had only one thought, I wanted this child, I only wanted this child.

Paranoia was my first step toward depression, and I didn't listen to the advice of a professional doctor, I had only one thought: "I just want to keep this embryo!" "Living in your own world and only hearing your own voice is a terrible thing!

A world of only one person

After two miscarriages, I was extra careful about my third pregnancy and found the cause of the miscarriage early. After a long period of fetal protection, a small baby was finally born, and various contradictions followed. For various reasons, there is no Gu Yue sister-in-law, child-rearing sister-in-law. I became a stay-at-home mom and spent most of the day alone with my baby. Twenty-four hours a day with a baby, bad rest. Like most families, the child's dad is just a decoration and can't help a little. And the mother, the mother-in-law also insists on the new parenting concept. It feels like one is the enemy of the whole world!

Loneliness was my second step toward depression, and I gave up on myself while having children. Depressed people can't find themselves, as if there is a small box that packs itself up!

I once read a report that a depressed mother did not want to live and killed her child, and she wanted to take her child to die. The author was very strange and angry: "Since you are a mother, why are you so cruel!" What right do you have to decide the fate of your child's life and death? "But I understand this mother. Because I have had this thought more than once: I can't rest assured of my child, I want to take her away, so that I can rest assured. This should also be the mother's last thought about her child!

I felt that my existence did not have any meaning and that I was doing things extremely, and I officially went into depression!

Depression is not far from each of us

Excessive stress; coercive repression; paranoid thoughts; loneliness in the crowd; doubts about everything; inability to find the meaning of one's existence. Over time, my behavior became strange: afraid of seeing people, liked the dark, wanted to cry when there was nothing to do, collapsed when I encountered a little thing, kept complaining about myself, and thought about ZS every other paragraph, but at that time I just felt as if I was wrong and didn't realize that I was wrong! (I raised it with my husband, he said I'm okay with it) How many of these are you? Is it a similar experience to mine?

5. Encounter the sunshine of the yin and yang

Because my children need to go out to class when they are older, I have to learn to drive if I don't like to contact others. A coach took three trainees, and one of them said nothing to me, and she saw that I was wrong. Every word of concern she said made me want to cry. I felt concerned that I didn't like to talk, and I had the urge to communicate. When I talk to her, she understands every word and every thought I have. We were like sisters who had been lost for many years, and we were all best friends to this day. I'm so thankful I met her!

The encouragement of friends and loved ones is a window to come out. Meeting someone who understands you and is willing to talk to you makes me see the sunshine in the dark again! Try to find a little gap in the "little box" to let the sun and air in!

Don't be afraid, try to face yourself

One of the things I wanted to do most before was to study it and understand it. I had to have an outcome and at the same time understand the cause, and I was still fantasizing about its N processes. I can't think of it, I don't sleep, night after night, I will be very sad at the same time as I fantasize, I will cry, I will feel that there is no point in living. It's a vicious circle!

When something you can't think of a result is in front of you, and it's not happening or is about to happen, or there's only one beginning happening. But you are very concerned about this matter and are very troubled. Now that you know where the problem is, you must find a way to solve it. I've tried to think about the good in the past; I've tried not to cry when I'm sad; I've tried to control my emotions. In fact, the simplest and most effective way is not to want to!

Only by learning to let go will you find peace. Letting go is a door out of depression.

Seven Find yourself and welcome the new life

When you realize that you have lost yourself, you will want to find yourself. You can go and listen to some songs, whether it's a new song or a song from a long time ago, as long as it's something you like. Even if I still want to be in that box for the time being, I don't like to come out. Then you also have to give yourself some music, find some hobbies, find some distractions to do. I recently started learning to write, and while writing articles, I feel like I've found the real me, where I want to write anything I want to say, write my own opinions or write my own stories. There will be a lot of people "talking" to me in the future, I feel like I am no longer lonely, I will have a lot of listeners!

Wanting to express your thoughts and communicate with others is a real medicine to get out of depression!

Eight, fall in love with your current self

Depression in my eyes is a process of loss: losing my way, losing myself, losing everything. Activate the self-protection mechanism to protect yourself!

Getting out of depression is a searching process: looking for light, looking for sound, looking for love, looking for yourself!

May everyone find themselves and love themselves! You who are recognized by yourself are the most beautiful you!

Learn to find your own color in a world that is all gray. You deserve to be loved!