Marriage is a matter for two people, but the family cannot be left out either. The young couple's marriage encountered many obstacles, and finally had to choose to give up their beautiful relationship.
Zhang Yue is a sunny and handsome physical education teacher from an ordinary family. Two years ago, his mother, Sister Liu, bought a three-bedroom apartment for him with a down payment, hoping that he would be able to settle down as soon as possible. Zhang Yue soon met a girl from the county seat at work, and the two fell in love at first sight and decided to enter the marriage hall.
Different positions, different requirements. As an ordinary family, Zhang Yue's family can only afford a bride price of about 110,000, but the woman's parents think that their daughter marries into the city, and the bride price should be higher, so they put forward a request of 280,000. Although this made Zhang Yue's family feel a burst of invisible pressure, they still met the woman's requirements for the sake of this relationship.
Marriage is a matter that requires both parties to participate and understand and tolerate each other. But in the subsequent wedding preparation process, the woman's parents put forward more requirements, whether it was asking for cash or another set of wedding rooms belonging to their daughter's name, which made Zhang Yue's family feel helpless and desperate.
On the day of the wedding, Zhang Yue finally made up his mind and chose to give up this relationship, he took his parents and drove away, completely ending this wedding that should have been happy. Such an ending makes people have to think, which is more important, realism or love?
Origin: The bride price war
Sister Liu is Zhang Yue's mother and a good friend of the author. Two years ago, Sister Liu bought a three-bedroom apartment for her son Zhang Yue with a down payment, hoping to let her son settle down as soon as possible. Not long after, Zhang Yue met a girl from the county seat, and the two fell in love at first sight, and soon came to the point of talking about marriage.
In this small city, the bride price of ordinary families is generally around 110,000, and families with good conditions will give 130,000. But what is unexpected is that the woman's parents put forward a bride price of 280,000, which is more than half higher than the local ordinary standard.
As an ordinary family, Sister Liu and her husband felt tremendous pressure at that time. Not only do they have to prepare for this high bride price, but they also have to decorate the wedding room and hold a wedding banquet, which is undoubtedly a big expense for them.
However, Zhang Yue liked this girl very much, and in the end, with the support of her parents, she made up the 280,000 bride price requested by the woman. With such dedication, the two families finally sat down to discuss the engagement.
The requirements of the woman's parents
However, his son Zhang Yue said that even so, he was unwilling to give up this relationship. For the happiness of the child, Sister Liu and her husband had no choice but to agree to the woman's request and took out another 80,000 yuan.
In exchange for such a price, it is just an engagement ceremony. The main content of the wedding has just begun to be prepared, and the woman's parents have put forward even more outrageous requirements.
They demanded that in addition to the high bride price and jewelry costs, the daughter's name should be added to the marriage house to realize the ownership of the house. This is undoubtedly a huge violation and injury to Sister Liu's family.
Sister Liu and her husband obtained the house through the demolition of the urban village, plus the son's wedding house, which is the family property of their husband and wife. And the woman's parents actually asked to occupy a house independently, which is really unacceptable.
The conflict between the two parties intensified, and the wedding was finally canceled
Faced with the demands of the woman's parents, Sister Liu's family felt very helpless and painful. They have made great sacrifices for this wedding, but the woman's parents are never satisfied and keep putting forward new conditions.
Such an act is undoubtedly undermining and trampling on the dignity of the other party. As a young man, Zhang Yue also tried to communicate with his fiancée, hoping to find a mutually acceptable solution. But the girl insists on obeying her parents' arrangements and seems indifferent to her feelings.
Such contradictions intensified again and again, and the two sides eventually reached a stalemate. On the day of the wedding, Zhang Yue finally made up her mind and chose to give up this relationship, took her parents to drive away, and completely terminated the wedding that should have been a happy one.
For such an ending, people inevitably feel sorry. This pair of young people, who were originally talented and good-looking, had to give up their beloved because of the entanglement of the interests of both parents.
Marriage is love, and it is the marriage of both families
Marriage is indeed not just a private matter for two people. As family members, the opinions and attitudes of both parents can have a significant impact on the marriage. Behind this farce, the dominance of realism in the concept of marriage is exposed.
For Zhang Yue, who is from an ordinary family, of course, he hopes to create a beautiful living environment for his future wife and family with his own efforts and struggles. But the reality is often not satisfactory, and they have to succumb to the unreasonable demands of the woman's parents.
The woman's parents, on the other hand, are completely from the perspective of interests and have a very utilitarian attitude towards marriage. They asked for a high bride price and asked for another set of marriage houses in their daughter's name, which is undoubtedly measuring the relationship by material interests.
Material security or spiritual support
For Zhang Yue, it was undoubtedly a heavy blow for him to give up this relationship so painfully. In today's marriage market, more and more young people are facing a similar dilemma.
Many people believe that having a certain material foundation is the foundation of a marriage. But in reality, material security is not the whole story of marriage. Mutual understanding, respect and tolerance between people are the foundation of a happy marriage.
If we blindly pursue material interests and ignore the contagious power of love, then marriage will inevitably become a transaction. As Zhang Yue decided, he would rather give up the relationship than succumb to the unreasonable demands of the woman's parents.
On the contrary, if both parties can abandon the shackles of utilitarianism and sincerely devote themselves to the relationship, even if the conditions are not superior, they can still build a happy and harmonious family. The power of love is endless, it is able to overcome all difficulties and tolerate all differences.
Marriage is a matter of two people, and it is also a matter of two families
In fact, marriage is not just a matter between two people, but also a marriage between two families. The family background, financial situation, and values of both parties will have a significant impact on the marriage.
In the story of Zhang Yue and the girl, we can see that there is a clear difference in values between the parents of both sides. The woman's parents pay too much attention to material interests and ignore the maintenance of affection. Zhang Yue's family pays more attention to spiritual needs, and is still willing to pay for their feelings in the case of limited material conditions.
This difference in values will undoubtedly lead to serious contradictions between the two sides. The entanglement of interests between the two families eventually became a major obstacle to the relationship. Although Zhang Yue and the girl had a sweet time, they could not escape the tragic ending in the end.
Therefore, when it comes to marriage, not only young people themselves must have correct values, but parents also need to abandon those overly realistic concepts. Only when the families reach a consensus, respect and tolerate each other, can the road to happiness be paved for the couple.
What is the meaning of marriage?
In life, love and marriage are the two most important links. However, in the real society, more and more people equate marriage with the exchange of interests, ignoring its essential emotional value.
For Zhang Yue, his choice to give up this relationship is undoubtedly out of consideration for safeguarding his own interests. But this practice just shows that there are still some deviations in his inner understanding of marriage.
Marriage is not only a marriage between two families, but also a union of two people who are sincerely committed and trust each other. A happy family not only needs material support, but also spiritual fit and resonance.
We cannot deny that in the real society, material security is indeed an important foundation for building a marriage relationship. But if you are too attached to this and ignore the importance of love, then it will be difficult for the marriage to be truly happy.
As Zhang Yue said, even if there is no house as a guarantee, as long as both parties truly love each other, they can still form a warm family. The power of love is endless, it can overcome all difficulties and fill life with warmth and hope.
epilogue
Through the marriage experience of this young couple, it is not difficult to see the dominance of realism in the contemporary concept of marriage. Focusing too much on material interests and ignoring the sincerity of love has become a stumbling block for many people in their pursuit of marital happiness.
We should ask ourselves what is the meaning of marriage. Is it a simple material exchange, or is it a combination of two people who truly love and support each other? When material interests conflict with emotional needs, how should we choose?
I believe that only when all sectors of society can establish correct marriage values, abandon the shackles of utilitarianism, and put love and emotion in the most important position, can marriage truly move towards happiness and fulfillment. Let's work together to pave the way to happiness for more young people.