The 361st "Marriage Micro Class"
Ms. Zhang's (pseudonym) son is 10 years old and is not very attentive in his studies and is slow to do things. Ms. Zhang is more tolerant of her children, but the child's father advocates strict management, believing that "if you don't fight, you can't make a weapon". For this reason, husbands and wives often quarrel with each other, complaining, accusing and even attacking each other, which exacerbates family conflicts over time and affects the relationship between husband and wife and the healthy growth of children.
In order to improve the situation, Sister Min suggested that Ms. Zhang could learn nonviolent communication skills. Nonviolent communication is a more effective communication technique that encourages people to communicate in a soft, dismissive way and build more respectful, understanding and cooperative interpersonal relationships.
Next
The editor shares some
On the method of nonviolent communication
I hope to help sisters like Ms. Zhang in this case
Improve communication skills
Resolve family conflicts
01 Objectively express your observations
When communicating, we should not only fully listen to the other person's ideas, but also describe the observed situation in objective and concrete language, avoiding the use of abstract or generalized words. For example, we can say, "I've noticed that when your child is studying, you sometimes speak to him in a harsh tone. Such expressions are more objective and easier for the other party to accept. Also, avoid directly judging the other person's intentions or motives, and instead focus on describing the objective behavior you observe, which can help build the foundation of communication.
02Sincerely express your feelings
It is very important to express personal feelings and emotions sincerely. The purpose of communication between husband and wife is to understand and empathize with each other through sincere expression, so that both parties can solve problems more actively. Therefore, do not use cover-up language in communication, but express your inner emotions honestly. For example, use phrases like "I feel" to emphasize personal feelings, connect emotions and feelings to specific actions or events, and avoid blaming the other person to make it easier for the other person to understand where you stand. This type of communication can enhance trust between couples and help create a more harmonious family atmosphere.
03Sincerely express your needs
When expressing needs, we use a positive and honest tone and emphasize the expectation of working together. For example, we could say, "I wish we could discuss together how to better educate our children, would you?" The use of words such as "we" and "together" to emphasize family teamwork can help reduce the resistance of the other party, and through sincere and cooperative expressions, stimulate the desire of the other party to actively participate, make the other party realize that each member of the family has similar expectations and needs, create the preconditions for cooperative problem solving, and also help to change the atmosphere of dialogue from mutual opposition to common cooperation.
04Express your good expectations
At the end of the communication, we can express to the other party our expectations for family harmony and the healthy growth of our children. For example, we can say, "I hope we can work together to create a warmer and more harmonious family atmosphere for the healthy growth of our children." Through such words, it not only increases the warmth and enthusiasm of the dialogue, but also expresses good wishes for the other party and the whole family, and through positive guidance, encourages both parties to work together towards a more positive and beautiful goal.
We hope that you can establish a healthy and friendly relationship and connection with your family through non-violent communication with mutual understanding and respect, and promote harmonious coexistence among family members through loving interactions, so as to continuously improve family happiness.
Source: Sister Min