Some people believe that the factor that affects the rise and fall of a family is economic problems, and if the family has a strong economic background, then the family will prosper. And if a family is poor, then the family will go into decline.
Is that really the case? This is not necessarily the case.
It is only in middle age that people understand that it is not "poor" who drags down a family
"Whether a family is prosperous or not must be linked to economic ability, and any family whose wives are separated must be because they are too poor." Many people hold this view.
It is true that poverty can make it difficult for a family to sustain, but have you ever wondered how a family full of harmony can be poor? The reason why families cannot make ends meet is often caused by disharmony within the family.
The disharmony that can affect the trend of the family is not the quarrel between the husband and wife, nor can it be the occasional mistake of the children, because they do not have the dominance of the family.
Only the most "prestigious" person in the family, that is, the elderly in the family, will affect the harmonious atmosphere of the family.
Many young people can't understand this truth, because when they are still the youngest in the family, they generally don't need to worry about the housework at home.
And when we enter middle age and become the pillar of the family, we can find out how important the old people have on the rise and fall of the family, it can be said that the prosperity of a family is because of the elderly, and a family can also be dragged down because of the elderly.
I still remember that there was such a family in our community at the beginning, and after the young couple got married, life was still quite nourishing.
The family of three is happy, the young couple has a good relationship, the career is smooth, the children study well, sensible and reasonable, such a harmonious relationship, so that their family is also thriving, and they usually live very happily.
Although it is not a lot of wealth, it can be regarded as living a well-off life.
When the days were good, the young couple wanted to do their filial piety, so they took the old man in the family to live, but this decision made them regret it for the rest of their lives.
After the old man moved in, the husband and wife gradually began to quarrel non-stop, and the children were also affected, not to mention the decline in grades, and their personalities began to become obedient. In the end, the two broke up and the family died.
Why did such a loving little couple end up in divorce? It has to do with the elderly.
After the elderly come in, many living habits, life concepts, lifestyles, etc., are different from those of the young couple.
It stands to reason that it is normal for the elderly and young to have many differences in life because they live in different eras, and they just need to tolerate each other.
However, the old people do not know how to be tolerant, so they feel that "they are old people, and young people must listen to the old people", and they also think that "they have crossed more bridges than young people have walked", and even think that "young people are wrong", and interfere in the lives and habits of young people everywhere.
At first, the young couple respected the old man, no matter what opinions they had, they discussed them privately until they finally couldn't bear it......
Although it is said that "there is an old man in the family, if there is a treasure", these three kinds of old people may drag down a family
◎ The old man who "relies on the old and sells the old".
If people's lives want to change with each passing day, then they need to keep up with the trend of the times, conform to the times, and grasp the characteristics of the development of the times, so as to be able to enjoy the dividends of the times.
For example, in this era, it is an era of abundant materials, and we don't need to worry too much about food and clothing, so we should focus our energy on other places to seek better development.
In the era of the Great Famine, there was a severe shortage of materials at that time, and people could even starve to death, so at that time it was necessary to focus on the problem of food and clothing.
However, some old people don't understand this truth, and always think that they are old, they are elders, and they have rich life experiences, so they know more than young people.
Therefore, as long as young people have any habits, ideas, etc. in their lives, which are different from their own, they are all young people's faults and need to be "corrected".
Eventually, the family will be dragged down by the "self-confidence" of the elderly, the relationship between family members will gradually deteriorate, and the family will eventually dissolve.
◎ The old man who is "self-contained".
Everyone has their own life experiences, so it's normal to have different perspectives of thought.
However, if the elderly find that their thoughts and habits have not kept up with the pace of the times, but do not know how to change, then it will bring a heavy burden to the family.
In fact, there are many such things in the news, such as an old man in Wuhan who likes to "pick up garbage", which is actually a habit of thrift for the elderly.
However, now the house is full of garbage, not only the smell is unpleasant, but there is no place for people to live, which seriously affects life.
The neighbor thought it tasted bad and asked the old man to clean it up, but the old man didn't listen. The children persuaded the old man to clean up, but the old man still did not listen. The neighborhood committee helped the elderly clean up free of charge, but the old people were still unwilling.
In the end, it was the children who secretly found someone to "buy" the old man to "sell" the garbage at home.
The behavior of the elderly not only worsens the relationship between neighbors, but also makes children worry and consumes money, which has a very bad impact on the family, and in the long run, it will definitely drag down the family.
◎ "stubborn" old man
Some old people are really helpless.
There is a short video on the Internet that is very popular, an old man found his son for help, but the son was furious, and even said that he "can't live".
In fact, it is not that the son is unfilial, but that this old man is too "stubborn".
It is reported that this old man has been trapped in the distribution trap for many years, and has used all the family's money to "do business", and has lost nothing left of his family.
Later, the son was afraid that his small family would not be safe, so after giving all his assets to the old man, he took his wife and children to another city to work hard again.
And a few years later, the son just gained a foothold in the city and bought a new house, but at this time the old man came to the door and asked his son to "sell the house and invest".
Therefore, how can there be such an old man in the family without being dragged down?
Write at the end
We believe that no old man will want his family to be separated, so I hope that the old people, as the "anchor of the sea" in the family, must know how to "let go", let go of their children to develop to their heart's content, put down their old ideas, and put aside their "authority".
When people are old, they have to serve the old, don't worry too much about family affairs, and enjoying their old age is the greatest help to their children. So, what are your thoughts on this?
(The pictures in this article are all from the Internet, and the infringement will be deleted immediately)