A few days ago, I went out for a walk and met an acquaintance, and the two chatted while walking.
This acquaintance probably just finished a quarrel with her husband, and when she met me, she happened to have a place to complain, and she talked endlessly about her relationship with her husband in the past few years.
The husband earns little salary, doesn't do housework, and is still a mother's treasure man, whenever he has a conflict with his mother-in-law, he always stands by his mother-in-law without asking the reason and unites to deal with her.
She said that in the past ten years, the two have been arguing, which has made her love completely gone, and she is physically and mentally exhausted.
Looking at her expression full of resentment because of anger, two words came to mind: give up.
When some relationships can't get the desired results no matter how hard they try, it is better to choose to give up than to be held hostage by negative emotions.
Giving up is a good way to bring peace and tranquility to your heart, and it is also the best way to maintain your health.
After retirement, many people always want to grasp something in the face of more and more losses in their lives, even if it is to consume their own people and things, they are unwilling to let go, and let themselves live a tangled and helpless life.
Learning to give up can make us have a good mood of being quiet and comfortable, and it is also the only way to happiness.
So, how do you give up?
First, give up what you can't get by working hard
In life, not all efforts can see results, and not all efforts will necessarily be rewarded.
The spirit of perseverance and perseverance to the end is certainly praised, but giving up is also the great wisdom of life.
It takes courage and determination to give up, and it requires us to face our hearts, admit failure, admit our powerlessness, and accept reality.
In life, many people have the psychology of "loss aversion", in order to avoid losses, they often make some irrational decisions, and unconsciously fall into the mentality of not wanting to let go even if they have to suffer.
Abandonment is a stop-loss and a turn.
Only by giving up the old can we start with lighter steps and find new breakthroughs and opportunities.
02: Abandon an energy-consuming relationship
In life, we will meet all kinds of people, some will become our friends, and some will become our enemies. And some relationships can make us feel tired and powerless.
Such relationships constantly drain our energy, make us unable to focus on work and life, and make life worse and worse.
Fan Shengmei in "Ode to Joy" has always been entangled in her relationship with her parents. On the one hand, he resented his parents' partiality and gave all his love to his younger brother, and on the other hand, he couldn't help but pay and sacrifice for his family.
When her parents made all kinds of unreasonable demands, although she was angry, she had no way to refuse, only to give and bear endlessly, which made her live a tangled and painful life.
When she realized her problem, she established clear boundaries and stopped letting her family consume her endlessly.
From that moment on, her life changed dramatically.
In life, we should be brave enough to abandon a relationship that consumes our energy and not let it erode our lives.
Only by leaving can we create a comfortable growth environment for ourselves, and life can get better and better.
03: Give up a life you don't like
Giving up a life you don't like does not mean failure, but a manifestation of courage and wisdom.
A friend of mine in my writing class had a job that was the envy of others, but she said it wasn't what she wanted.
She has to attend all kinds of meetings every day and work overtime endlessly, so she has no time to improve herself.
More importantly, because I am too busy with work, there is no one to take care of the young children at home, so I am left to take care of the elderly at home, and I often receive calls from teachers complaining about the children's performance at school.
After careful consideration, she resigned decisively and started her own freelancing path while taking care of the baby at home.
Although her income has dropped, she has gained a good mood and a sense of control over her life.
Only by giving up the life that a person does not like can he have the opportunity to choose what he really wants, and only then can there be a new turn in life.
Of course, in this process, we need to constantly adapt to the new environment, learn new skills, and adjust our mentality to make life better.
Zhang Xiaoxian once said: "When you learn to give up, you can bear all the disappointments and lies, I can do nothing, what else can you do." ”
Give up pleasing others in order to truly be yourself;
Give up the anxiety about appearance in order to accept yourself;
Letting go of expectations of others is the only way to truly take responsibility for your own life.
Giving up is harder to do than having because it conjures up words like weakness, withdrawing, and failure.
But loss and possession are connected, and the loss of the old and the new will come into our lives.
Learn to give up rationally, on the road of life, we can move forward lightly, in order to become a better version of ourselves with a more free and easy attitude, a better mood.
And this is the best health. #在退休之后, what are your insights? #