#给孩子一个快乐幸福的童年不好吗? #
A psychologist once said, "A child's flowers today are the fruits of his future." "The journey of a child's growth will leave a mark on their hearts and have a profound impact on their future growth path. So, how can parents create a happy and happy childhood for their children? Wise parents avoid the three most common parenting pitfalls.
1. Excessive spoiling leads to dependence
Every parent wants to give their children the best possible care. Excessive spoiling will make children lose the ability to stand on their own. The Soviet educator Makarenko once said: "If parents do not love their children enough, children will be hurt, and too much pampering will lead to their demise." ”
Excessive pampering can lead to a child's lack of independence, poor adaptability, and emotional problems. Wise parents should let go at the right time, let their children exercise on their own, face setbacks, and learn to be self-reliant. Just as the revolutionary Liu Shaoqi said about the "management and release method": let the children suffer more and have more knowledge, so that parents will love them more and let go appropriately.
2. Excessive control kills nature
Some parents are indifferent to their children, while others are the complete opposite, treating their children as their own. In their opinion, "what I say is what you say, you have to listen to it", and having their own opinions on everything about their children is stifling their children's independent thinking and growth.
Wise parents should pay attention to their children's independent personality, and should not blindly ask their children to be obedient in everything, but should give guidance and help in a timely manner. To gain your child's trust, all you have to do is think of yourself as your mentor rather than your boss or manager.
3. Indifference and neglect hinder intimacy
There are also parents who neglect their children because they are too busy with work and work. Children's emotional needs are not met and can ultimately have a detrimental effect on the parent-child relationship. British educator Charlotte Mason once said: "Many parents are busy for a while, when they want to give them enough love, they find that they can't communicate with them at all, they are already overwhelmed for them." ”
Children who lack love are prone to low self-esteem, introverted personalities, and have difficulty establishing normal interpersonal relationships. Without the careful care of parents, a child is like a seedling that has not been watered, and it is difficult to bloom brightly in the future. Eileen Chang is one such example, she was greatly neglected as a child, which led to her sensitivity and low self-esteem. Although she has experienced so much emotional trauma, she still longs for the comfort of love.
There is still a long way to go in parenting, and parents should always be vigilant and not fall into the "way of parenting" that is overly spoiled, overly controlled, and ignored. Psychologist Mick Thompson once said, "The primary responsibility of parents is to cultivate their children's independence, to train them to learn how to protect themselves, and to let them go on higher levels of adventure and challenge away from their parents." ”
When a child grows up, he will leave his parents and go out into the wider world. Therefore, in the process of children's growth, wise parents should properly love, let go, guide, and accompany to create a happy and happy childhood for their children. Only with a bright undertone can children bloom in a place where the sun shines.
It is not easy to be a parent, while giving your child enough love, you should also let your child develop by herself at the appropriate time, and at the same time respect the child's independent personality while giving proper guidance. Only in this way will our children have a happy childhood and lay a good foundation for their lives.