Recently, An Lingrong cried on the hot search, which made the audience suddenly feel pity for the former An Xiaoniao after more than ten years.
However, what everyone is distressed about is not the character in "The Legend of Zhen Huan", but Tao Xinran, the actor of An Lingrong who took his mother to a variety show.
There is a passage in the show that can especially poke at the audience's empathy point.
In order to reward her daughter for her serious drawing, Tao Xinran took her mother and daughter to the supermarket to choose gifts, and her daughter said that she wanted Lego, but her grandmother picked up an exercise book without saying a word.
Later, the grandmother hit her daughter's love for toys many times, which made the children depressed in the end.
At this time, Tao Xinran resolutely chose to stand on the "opposite side" of her mother, she looked at her daughter gently and said, "You like the most important." ”
Probably because I was drenched in the rain when I was a child, I wanted to hold an umbrella for my daughter when I grew up.
Tao Xinran has been hit and denied since she was a child, so that at the age of nearly 40, she still sheds tears when she mentions the experience of being beaten when she was a child.
She was unwilling and didn't understand why she behaved well, but she still had to be beaten by that fat beating, why no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't get a compliment from her mother.
And her love, tolerance and encouragement for her daughter at the moment made netizens sigh: It turned out that Tao Xinran raised her daughter as her own again.
Everyone finally understood why Tao Xinran was able to properly play An Lingrong's inferiority complex, sensitive, gloomy and deep.
Because of her upbringing, isn't the suppression from her original family similar to An Xiaoniao?
I don't understand An Lingrong when I am young, and I am already a person in the play when I look at it again
The new variety show that Tao Xinran and her mother participated in is "It's a Daughter and a Mother" that Mango has just launched.
The program team invited four groups of celebrity mothers and daughters to observe their relationship patterns through a period of sojourn life that gets along day and night.
Zhao Xiaotang and her mother are happy, Ouyang Nana and Ouyang Nini are completely sisters with their mother, and Wang Luodan and her mother are also fighting with love.
The first three pairs of mother and daughter all reveal a kind of relaxation and harmony that does not belong to ordinary families, and the audience just crosses their waists to watch the fun.
Only when it came to Tao Xinran, the mother and daughter, as soon as the pilot film was broadcast, she and her mother and even the netizens in the barrage cried together.
Whether it is the inseparable relationship between her and her mother, or the faint confrontation, it resonates deeply with the audience.
They are not variety enough and will not throw stalks at each other to create topics, but this kind of mirror-like sense of substitution is the typical way for thousands of Chinese mothers and daughters to get along.
As Tao Xinran said, her mother is a strong, pungent and even somewhat authoritarian mother.
Her way of educating her children is simple and crude: beating.
Tao Xinran scored 98 points when she was a child, and her mother blamed her for throwing away the other two points carelessly, and beat her up;
She took the fourth place in the class, and her mother blamed her for not making it to the top three, and she was beaten again.
Seeing that netizens are distressed and surprised, she is not at the bottom of the exam or naughty in class, she has done a good job, and she still can't avoid being beaten.
Could it be that her mother will ask her why she didn't play the female number one after watching "The Legend of Zhen Huan"?
Tao Xinran's mother, who wholeheartedly agrees with repressive education, is still as strict with her granddaughter.
And Tao Xinran, who vowed never to treat her daughter the way her mother treated her, firmly chose another path of parenting.
She agreed with her daughter to make durian-filled dumplings, tolerated her crying, she steadily caught all her daughter's emotions, and did her best to make her daughter feel the steadfastness of relying on her mother.
Because she understands how profound the pain of childhood can be a person.
She had chosen to punish her mother for the harm she had done to her in a cruel way.
After starring in "The Legend of Zhen Huan" and becoming famous, many people hope that their mothers will share their parenting experience, Tao Xinran said coldly to her mother: "I became who I am today because of myself, not because of the success of your education." ”
She regretted saying this, but she couldn't let go of her childhood experience.
She hated her mother's denial and suppression that almost destroyed her childhood, and felt sorry for her hard work over the years.
This emotional pull has also become a deep gap between her and her mother, which is difficult to cross and cannot be ignored.
And this kind of emotional pull and invisible confrontation relationship also exists between thousands of Chinese families.
The East Asian "An Lingrong" who has been disliked all his life
From "unhappy parents" on the hot search, to "re-raising yourself" has become a new way of life for young people...
In the past few years, whenever there has been a discussion about parent-child relationship in the field of public opinion, "East Asian family" is the topic with the most slots and the deepest bond with everyone.
Digging sauce once wrote about the children who grew up in disappointment, and their life experiences are the same as Tao Xinran's.
After winning the third-class scholarship, I happily sent it to my parents, but was criticized for why I didn't get the first place.
It seems that he also saw another Tao Xinran in the parallel universe. When you take the fourth place, you will be beaten because you didn't make it to the top three, and after you get the third prize, you will be blamed for not being the first place.
There is also a heated conversation between a mother and daughter about the grades that netizens accidentally filmed.
The daughter said to her mother indignantly: "When I did well in the exam, you said that the questions were very simple, and when I didn't do well in the exam, you said that I was not good at the level." ”
The mother didn't care about her daughter's feelings at all, and shouted directly on the street: "I told you that you are very bad!"
Looking back at this video, it is hard to imagine the girl's heartache at the moment, and it seems that she has a concrete feeling for Tao Xinran's experience.
This familiar "repressive education" is also the youth shared by countless East Asian children.
If it's just a matter of academic performance, you'll be released at least the moment you leave campus.
But the sense of oppression of East Asian parents is pervasive and enduring and pervasive.
There was once a conversation between a Chinese mother and daughter that became popular all over the Internet.
My daughter went to the United States and was praised by many people for looking good even if she had dark skin. When she told her mother all this, her mother showed a very disdainful expression: "You are a beauty?"
When the daughter asked her mother why she didn't believe she was a beauty, she said, "I didn't like your lips since I was a child... In my heart, I think you're a clown. ”
As children, we don't really want to compete for the title of a beautiful woman, we just want to be favored by our parents.
And the East Asian parents, who have been high all their lives, don't seem to understand.
It has always been the prerogative of parents to judge, scrutinize and control their children's appearance.
There are girls who have dyed purple hair when they become adults, and their mothers say that they are "misses" and that they are not serious people.
The girl cried that her mother should not treat her own daughter like this, and the mother also said the classic chant: "I am my mother to say this to you." ”
The devastated sons and daughters of East Asia not only invented a series of "Parents Disappointing Dictionary" represented by "What's Fun" and "Raising a White-Eyed Wolf", but they also figured out the rules and strange tales that belong to East Asian families -
The family is friendly, but you can't refuse their request;
Meals are absolutely safe and anything can be suspended by eating;
No matter what your family does, it's out of love for you...
In this set of self-consistent and contradictory rules, the pain and rifts of East Asian families are hidden or endured.
Just like Tao Xinran and her mother, they cried in the self-introduction session, but they touched many people.
They obviously haven't expressed anything yet, but they have already made the audience feel empathy.
The intimate mother-daughter relationship is loose and has a high tolerance rate;
And the mother-daughter relationship that has created a rift is tense and cautious.
There are too many things I want to say and too many grievances in my heart, but only tears are really squeezed out of my body.
The injured child grows up to be an umbrella holder
There are not many parents in this world who are not unhappy.
Yi Nengjing's son Enli has occupied the hot search for a long time because of "cross-dressing".
Some people criticize him for not being male or female, and tampering with gender simply subverts the three views.
But the father Yu Chengqing said that as long as his son likes it, everything is OK.
Mother Yi Nengjing also said the golden sentence that was framed in the hearts of netizens: "Gender is neutral, gender is fluid, and Enli is fully supported by me." ”
Enli, a child who grew up with the wholehearted support of his parents, also showed considerable relaxation and freedom.
In a recent interview, he used wonderful expressions and confident conversation to let everyone finally see how charming the courage that grows in love is.
At the same time, this enviable positive case has also been exchanged for 10,000 words of blood letters from netizens, begging Yi Nengjing to give East Asian parents a parenting lesson.
In the real world, mothers like Yi Nengjing are rare, but Tao Xinran's mother is very common.
Attentive viewers found that Tao Xinran's mother was named Tao Yuedi.
Like countless Zhaodi and Pandi, does she also have a period of unsatisfactory youth?
And it is exactly like this that millions of women have learned in their own lives and passed on to their daughters and families.
Their ideas may be outdated, but it is also because of the limitations of her time and environment, and it is not all her fault.
There are as many unhappy parents in this world as there are children who raise themselves again when they become adults.
More than ten years ago, when we watched "The Legend of Zhen Huan", we hated An Lingrong so much, and I really hoped that she would die out as soon as possible.
But when this classic work is constantly smacked and a generation of audiences gradually grows up, we gradually understand An Lingrong. Because in the final analysis, she is just an ordinary woman who is burdened by her family and the times.
Her sensitivity, her brokenness, her humble sense of unworthiness are a tragedy created by her family, and it is also a tragedy created by the times. So today, we hope that An Lingrong can have a good ending.
In fact, Yi Nengjing's original family is not ideal.
When she was young, her father ran away from home because of her birth and another daughter, so that her mother blamed her appearance for these pains for many years.
Later, I experienced abuse by my adoptive parents, domestic violence by my brother-in-law, defection to my stepfather, and repayment of my father's debts... Yi Nengjing's youth is full of words, blood and tears.
However, after she became a mother, she chose to shield her children from all the wind and rain in this world.
Parents are first-time parents, but they have already been children once.
So Tao Xinran and Yi Nengjing have become the ones who hold umbrellas for their children.
From being suppressed, to reshaping self-worth, to re-raising oneself in the body of one's children. Tao Xinran and Yi Nengjing both used their lives to complete the redemption of the smallest unit between women.
In the show, Tao Xinran said to her mother that there is a war between parents and children, it is a tragedy for parents to win, and it is a comedy for children to win, "Thank you for letting me win."
And the child's victory does not mean that the parents are the losers.
When we no longer pursue perfect parents or perfect children, it may be the day when the parent-child relationship is truly reconciled.