Let learn to bark and pretend to be a dog to crawl, a 6-year-old girl still treats her sister as a friend, and she doesn't realize that it is "bullying"

The terrible thing about children's "bullying" is not only the push and abuse on the surface, but also the "hidden bullying".

Kids, and even parents, don't realize that "this is bullying."

1

A 6-year-old girl learns to bark and pretend to be a dog in the community, and she doesn't know it when she is helped up by adults

The first year of junior high school in the TV series "Happy Parents Group" is a quiet girl who has conflicts with her good friends, and no one plays with her.

I accidentally met two big sisters in the community who were willing to play with me, and I was very happy in the first year of junior high school. But the purpose of the big sister is to let Chu Yi give herself a limited-edition bubble machine, buy snacks for herself every day, and buy stationery.

When the money for the first year was spent, the eldest sister asked the first junior high school to pretend to be a puppy, crawl on the ground, and let the dog bark, deliberately teasing the "puppy" with things.

Jelly Bean, a former friend, unintentionally bumped into this scene and found his mother to help. Jelly Bean's mother recorded a video of her two big sisters bullying the first year of junior high school and sent it to the mother of the first year of junior high school. This time, Jelly Bean's mother saved Hatsui.

But when I came home in the first year of junior high school, I still insisted on continuing to play with my big sister, because everyone else stopped playing with me.

Chu Yi didn't realize that his big sister was bullying him.

When his former friends found the first year of junior high school, and the parents of the first year of junior high school found the school of the two big sisters to expose their behavior, the first year of junior high school realized that "the big sister is not a real friend." ”

As a parent, if you see your children being bullied like this, you will definitely not be able to stand it. Even the mother of a good friend who was passing by saw this scene, and immediately recorded the video to preserve the evidence and drive away the bully child.

When I watched this episode, I was very uncomfortable, thinking that my twins are two lively boys, and the two brothers are always together on weekdays, so they won't be bullied like this.

Unexpectedly, something happened over the weekend.

2

The twin brother was verbally violently abused by the eldest child, but he still stood still waiting for the older brother to play with him

On weekend mornings, my husband works overtime. I cook Chinese medicine for my children at home. My mom was playing in the neighborhood with her two children.

My mom came home later to prepare lunch. In the middle of my decoction, I also went downstairs to take a look. For about 15 minutes at most, there are no adults around the child!

Playing with my elementary school classmate Xingxing, Xingxing's mother has known each other for a few years, and she sent me several sets of photos of the children. I thought that it should be safe and reassuring to have familiar parents watching.

The last time I went downstairs to see the kids, the other kids I was playing with had already left, and my twin brother was still waiting for them to go back to the basketball court to play basketball together. I think the kids must have had a lot of fun together.

He comforted the child: "The other children should be home, it's almost noon, and the weather is good next weekend, you will come here to play again, and you will definitely meet these children again today." ”

When I got home, I casually asked the child, "In addition to the stars, are there any older children who are playing together today? Do you know him? Do you two prefer to play with older children?"

What my brother said, I never expected, if I didn't ask more today, I guess I would continue to "rest assured" that my child goes out alone for free activities.

The two brothers told me about what happened on the basketball court. The older child, known by the stars, is called Brother Chenchen.

Xingxing, Chenchen and his younger brother each ride a bicycle, and the elder brother rides a scooter.

After a while, my brother didn't ride the bicycle and left it on the side, and when he picked up the bicycle again, he noticed that the front of the bicycle was crooked, and asked the brother, "Did you break it?"

But Chenchen thought that his brother did it, and kept shouting: "I'm going to kick you to death." Classmate Xing Xing not only didn't help his brother, but also coaxed: "I'm going to kick you to death." ”

When Chenchen was about to move his feet, his brother said, "My mother is sitting over there." The younger brother also immediately hugged Chenchen and said, "Don't beat my brother, he didn't break it, he said it himself." ”

Then Chenchen and Xingxing rode away.

My brother also added to me: "Chenchen's father and grandmother have been sitting by the playground, and Xingxing's mother has also come home to cook later. ”

3

Timely review of the child's incident is a necessary means to prevent malignant incidents

I first stabilized my emotions and told the brothers: "My brother did the right thing today, he is taller than you, don't fight, run away in time." So what would you do if Mom hadn't sat next to her for a while today?"

The elder brother said, "Then I'll run to a place where there are adults and shout." ”

"What are you shouting?" I asked my brother.

The elder brother thought for a long time and said, "I shouted: How can you beat someone, it's not right to beat someone." "Eh, this baby is angry and polite.

I taught the brothers again, and they tried it out loud a few times: "You have to say short sentences, keep it simple, and everyone can hear: "Hit someone! Help!" and ran towards the crowded area. If you want to be in a corner where no one is around, you can't run, you can give whatever people want, and it is important to save your life. ”

I think Chenchen's verbal violence and imminent action may be a parody of a video or a parent's behavior. My two boys sometimes swear sometimes. I also discussed it with my husband, and now the other party hasn't done it, and he can't go online, he should be protected, and he should be prevented, but if he really does it, he will deal with it again.

I continued to ask the child, "Did you have fun today?"

My brother said, "I was happy at first, but I kept scolding me in that paragraph, and I was not happy." ”

I took the opportunity to educate the children: "In the future, when you go downstairs to play or go to other places, we will still have an adult with you." Next time, if you want, you can still play with Chenchen. I see that you are still waiting for Chenchen and the stars to come back at the intersection, you should like it.

But swearing, losing your temper over small things, you see it, and you don't like it yourself. We don't want to be like Chenchen today in the future, okay?

If there's something happy and unhappy, Mom would love you to share it with me. ”

The scary thing about child bullying is that children don't realize it: these behaviors are "bullying."

4

The scary thing about child bullying is that children don't realize it: these behaviors are "bullying"

Children want to have playmates, and even twin brothers like me, who are playful and close-knit, want to have children other than brothers to play with.

However, children's ability to discern is limited, and sometimes they do not realize that the other person's behavior is unfriendly, and we need to help children identify these "hidden bullying".

First, "insulting" is not without a lack of meat, it is also "bullying".

For example, my brother encountered this incident on the weekend, I guess the reason is that Chenchen saw that the adults of my two boys were not always around, and when they started to play on the swing, they were urged by their brother.

But if my brother is silent, he keeps listening to the other party insulting himself. Or my family is a child playing in one place, without a brother to help him say a few words, and then there is no deterrent adult next to him.

Verbal abuse may be just the first step, the second step is to actually do it.

Second, "ridicule" is also implicit bullying, which is a small thing for adults and can be a big thing for children.

When a child is excluded, ridiculed, pushed, bullied, discriminated against, or wronged at school, don't say "it's just classmates joking", and stop sarcastically saying "why is it targeting you!"

If the child sends a distress signal to his parents, and the parents do not pay attention to it, this kind of "hidden bullying" will become more and more intense, and the child may become more and more inferior, or even go to a dead end.

It may be a small thing for adults, but for children, it can't be solved by their own strength, and I hope parents can help themselves.

I saw a post on Zhihu, a boy in the girl's class competed with her for a position and never competed, so he encouraged the whole class to isolate the girl and deliberately work against her. My mother found the head teacher, and the head teacher said, "This boy has good grades, no! ”

My mother wrote a small essay to the class teacher, to the effect that this is school bullying, and if the teacher can't stop this behavior in time, I will report the situation to the Education Bureau to all parties.

The head teacher immediately held a class meeting on "hidden bullying" in the class, and since then, no one dares to isolate and target the girls.

If parents are unable to protect their children, they will only be bullied more harshly.

Third, what should we do if we encounter "physical abuse"? Parents should teach their children to protect their privacy.

It doesn't matter if it's a boy or a girl, yes, but also a boy, the damage to the boy is more insidious. Parents should teach their children to protect their own physical privacy.

If someone deliberately touches their body and can't refuse, tell their parents as soon as possible.

"Implicit bullying" is very hidden, not to mention children, many times, adults themselves do not think that this is bullying their own children, thinking "big things into small things, small things into small things." ”

We can learn together with the "Children's Anti-Bullying Enlightenment Education Picture Book", a full set of 8 volumes, suitable for 2-8 years old kindergarten, lower primary school children and parents. The story uses a first-person approach, taking the child to identify bullying in an immersive way.

Each book ends with an introduction to how bullying can be done and how to deal with it. Let the child understand that it is not his fault when he encounters this situation, and he must tell his parents.

It also allows parents to understand the psychological changes and performance of their children when they are bullied, and help their children avoid harm in time.

Final words

Globally, 25% of children have experienced bullying at one time or another. Every child can be a bully or a bullied person, whether it is a family, a school, a society, whether it is a parent or a teacher, we need to be more concerned about this issue to avoid tragedy.

Let every child truly have a healthy and sunny childhood!