I took my son on a high-speed train and felt sorry for the whole world

In the past year or two, whether it is a trip with a baby or a business trip by myself, as long as the drive is within 6 hours, I will be more willing to choose high-speed rail, not only economical and controllable, but also because I like the feeling of driving smoothly on the ground, and this kind of time when I can relax for a long time (although sometimes I have to be busy with work, I can still feel relaxed).

This morning's high-speed rail ride is also extraordinarily long, looking at the changing scenery outside the car window, I remembered the two episodes I encountered when I took the high-speed rail after the year, and I just took advantage of today to talk to you, which is also a topic I have always wanted to communicate with you.

The first time was to take my son to Quanzhou during the winter vacation.

At that time, it was just in time for the Spring Festival, and it was particularly difficult to grab train tickets. As a result, I was separated by two rows from OK.

The schematic diagram is as follows 👇

I was able to grab high-speed rail tickets to popular destinations for the Spring Festival, and I already feel thankful. At that time, I thought, get in the car and find someone next to me to change, after all, my son and I should be single. But I didn't expect to be optimistic...... I didn't expect it to be so hard!

As soon as I got on the bus that day, there was a young man in his twenties sitting next to the OK seat, so I went to ask him first, "Hello, please ask if I can change seats with you, when I bought the ticket, my son's position diverged, can I help me change it?"

This young man hesitated for a long time, didn't say no, didn't say yes, I felt that he was a little worried, so he pointed to my position and said, two rows away from here. He got up and looked, snapped and sat down again: "Your seat is not by the window, I won't change it, you can ask someone else." And my luggage is also put away, and it is inconvenient to move around. ”

Okay, it's not a good deal, but it's understandable, I have a second chance, so I'll wait for the passenger on the edge of my seat to come over. After looking left and right for about ten minutes, I finally waited for a little girl. So I immediately went up to her and asked her if I could help me change my son's position.

The little girl didn't raise her head and said, "No!"

Yes, she only threw me two words, and she didn't say any reason: for example, I want to sit by the window, for example, there is a strange man next to your son, and I don't want to sit with him......

This really surprised me and choked up.

I was a little embarrassed, when suddenly the little girl turned to me and said, "I'll change it with you, but can you put my suitcase on the shelf first?" ”

...... Although the little girl is small, I don't know how she thinks I'm stronger than her, probably she knows that the arm strength of being a mother is good. You know how I felt!

But I still went to help, the suitcase was indeed quite heavy, and the little girl saw that I was alone and struggled, so she also reached out and moved it together...... After that, she sat in the OK position.

After tossing for ten minutes, he finally sat down next to his son. I felt a little bad in my heart, and I felt as if I had offended the whole world.

This matter quickly turned the page, and after the start of work, I went on a business trip to Changsha, and when I returned, I also took the high-speed train back alone.

At that time, there were three people sitting in the row, and my place was by the aisle, with a middle-aged uncle in the middle and an aunt by the window.

As soon as he sat down in his position, an uncle came over, his hair was a little gray, and he said earnestly, "Can you help change the position?"

But this uncle didn't say it to me, he said it to the middle-aged uncle next door to me, "The position inside is my wife." ”

The middle-aged uncle smiled and said, "Oh, you old husbands and wives still have to sit together!

The tone is very polite, but at first glance I feel that he doesn't want to move his ass, I think then I and Uncle will be replaced, anyway, I am also a person, it doesn't matter where I sit.

Unexpectedly, the middle-aged uncle next to him said that he was reluctant, but his actions were very sincere, and he stood up without waiting for me to speak, "Then where is your position, I'll sit down." ”

"I'm so sorry, my position is in another car, in car 16, a little far away, but I don't worry about my wife, so I want to change places with you. ”

I also chuckled when I heard this, knowing that our carriage and carriage No. 16 were not only far away, but also not connected in the middle, so we had to walk through from the outside. 👇

I subconsciously thought that the middle-aged uncle next to me would refuse, but I didn't expect him to immediately pick up his luggage and prepare to walk outside the car door, "Then you sit down quickly, I'll go over immediately, the car is about to go......"

At that time, the sunset outside the window just shone down, which also made me feel so warm all night.

Uncle's enthusiasm reminded me of the previous seat change experience, and although I can understand what the two young people did, I still feel that it is cold. I also have some questions in my heart, whether the current young generation sometimes pursues the so-called "self", which is really a bit too much!

This also reminds me of a symposium between Xu Zhiyuan and Wu Xiaobo on the Internet before, and Xu Zhiyuan specifically mentioned a paragraph, "Young people nowadays have changed a lot, and the most obvious feeling is that their ability to ask questions is declining." ”

A professor at another university also said, "I have a similar feeling in school: students' ability to ask questions in recent years has significantly declined compared with five years ago. ”

The so-called "decline in questioning ability", Xu Zhiyuan said-

"First, they don't seem to be able to grasp what the core of each other's speech is.

Second, they tend to be overly self-expressive, not asking you anything, but saying how I am. So I think it's really one of the hallmarks of this era:

People lose their impulse and interest in understanding others, and their emotions become very numerous. ”

In summary, there is a common trait in today's young people, they have lost the ability to empathize and empathize, and the "self" always comes first.

I was deeply touched by this passage.

Unlike those of us born in the 70s and 80s, the post-95s and post-00s are very individualistic and have a lot of paths to self-expression, which just happened to catch up with the era of big data algorithms. Social platforms will always push you a steady stream of opinions and information that you agree with, and it is easy to fall into an "information cocoon": you will not hear different opinions at all, and even continue to solidify your own originally slightly narrow values, and there will be a voice in your head that repeatedly tells you that you are right, and everyone is doing this, which is a matter of course......

For example, "the problem of difficulty in changing seats on high-speed rail", I searched the Internet for related discussions, and what surprised me was that the mainstream arguments were actually -

"It's love for me to change shops with you, and it's my duty not to change them. ”

"You are old, you are inconvenient legs, but you can't use it as a weight to win sympathy and moral kidnapping. ”

There is also such a question on Zhihu: How to elegantly refuse someone else's request to change seats?

The following high-praise answer is short, simple and powerful: it is your right to refuse to change seats, and you don't need to be elegant.

I was already able to predict that at this time, if I "dared" to make some different noises, no matter how much I talked about them, I would soon be sprayed to death by a large pool of "saliva".

After so many years of self-media, I have also mastered a "life-saving rule", that is, try not to stand on the opposite side of the majority of netizens.

Therefore, in the face of such views and arguments, I only have a deep sense of powerlessness.

Xu Zhiyuan also reluctantly said that there is no solution to change the status quo, and this state of affairs will continue, and each generation will be tired of many of the practices of the previous generation, and they are not interested in understanding the thoughts of the previous generation. Therefore, our responsibility is to provide some diversity and let him see more possibilities in life.

Of course, I know that the reason why the younger generation is becoming more and more indifferent is because life is too tired, everyone is chasing their own KPIs in a hurry, and everyone has to build an "iron wall" for themselves;

It's just that the adult world can be chaotic, but I still want to tell my children some rights and wrongs: even though everyone is not living an easy life, I still hope that you can still retain a little kindness, you can help those in need when you have spare time, and you should also be grateful to those who have helped you anytime and anywhere.

Today is a middle-aged woman's slightly outdated thoughts, you can also tell us in the comment area whether you have similar experiences or feelings.