In so many years outside, I have seen too many etiquettes, too many socializing, too many politeness and greetings.
But I think the warmest is still Zaozhuang
That long-standing simplicity of hospitality.
The Zaozhuang people call the guests the guests (kei), call the guests who come to visit (kei), and call the mothers and parents who send relatives to the big guests (kei), and they must pay more attention. When the hour was still very poor, the occasional guest came to the family, and the whole family would rush to the gate excitedly, scrambling to take what was in the hands of the guest, calling the guest's title to the door, but often arguing for half a day over which of the main guest came to the door. Of course, the last person to enter the door must be the guest.
The constraints of life will make the owner try to get at least four dishes by all means, and the Lunan people never put a single dish, either four, or six, ten, eight, or not three, five, seven. Because even numbers are auspicious numbers.
The first thing to entertain guests is to pay tribute to tea first, if you are really poor, even if you go to the commissary to buy two or two aged old tea leaves, the color of the tea brewed out is like the color of the dried sweet potato stalks, maroon brown, drink in the mouth without tea taste. But the host will still diligently and carefully pour it in a clean porcelain tea bowl and respectfully hold it to the guests. Then keep letting the guests drink tea, drinking one lamp after another. In the middle, he also handed over a cigarette without interruption, drinking and smoking while chatting.
As for the wine, not to be sloppy, the Zaozhuang people regard the position of the wine as very high, do not say that it is a male guest, that is, a female guest, but also to take out the wine to pour, as long as the female guest does not object, you drink to black, the host will definitely accompany you to the black. Zaozhuang people's ability to persuade wine is already high, and there are a hundred reasons to persuade wine into your stomach. I am not afraid that you are drunk, I am afraid that you will not drink well. It is also a good idea to personally send you home when you are drunk.
When eating vegetables, the host will first pick up the chopsticks, greet the guests with the chopsticks, and say: "Come, nag (clip) to eat, nag to eat." The mouth said, but never move the chopsticks first, wait for the guest chopsticks to be clamped first, and the main person will clip it." If you encounter a guest who is too fake (polite), don't try to clip the chopsticks for two or three minutes. They will dance chopsticks to each other to make their faces red. Finally, the host was forced to be anxious, and simply put a chopstick dish on the plate in front of the guests.
Jujube spicy chicken
I remember when I was a child, my uncle came to my house, because my family was poor, and my parents were worried about running out of food. The second grandmother in the backyard carried four eggs with a gourd scoop, held a few green onions and walked in from outside the door with a smile and handed it to her mother, saying, I know that your family is coming, give you a dish. The second grandmother just left, the third grandmother of the east courtyard put her head on the east wall and called out to her mother, handed over a few pieces of powder, a small scoop of white noodles said, don't forget to roll out a bowl of noodles for the guests to eat. Let's make a dish with this powder skin. The father caught a rooster and killed it, put together a plate of shredded potatoes, and the whole neighbors could smell the seductive smell of vegetables.
Jujube mutton soup
When the guest leaves, the host will send a good distance, and only after several persuasions of the guest can not stop, but also stand there with his eyes to send a good distance. This is still a common way of hospitality, if there is a funeral in the family, especially the mourning (the old man who dies of old age), the great filial piety will kneel on the inside of the gate and prostrate to the guests who come to pay tribute to show their thanks.
As for the most solemn hospitality on the red event (marriage), it should be to entertain the bridesmaids. The master had to arrange the best room for them, the best banquet, and two clever girls to pour tea and water on the side. If the waiter is not careful, he will attract the on-the-spot accusations of the bridesmaids, and even anger the host. It is even more prudent for the groom to come to toast them, so as not to provoke unnecessary condemnation.
When toasting, it is usually a person who holds a wine plate with the groom, and under the sound of the trumpet, the goblet in the tray is poured first half a cup, and then the groom respectfully serves it to the two bridesmaids at the top, three times, and when the third time, the wine is filled, and the guests must be allowed to drink dry. Otherwise, the bridegroom is not respected. If guests don't drink, the horn has to follow the urge, so that you have to drink. In this way, from the top to the bottom, until the bottom two people, the groom's task can be completed. A toast often lasts more than half an hour. Before the bridesmaids left, the host also gave each of them a gift prepared in advance: a bag with two packs of sugar and two packs of cigarettes, and the generous lord would stuff a handkerchief or towel in the bag.
As for the treatment of the bride's guests before returning to the door, the number of gifts should not be neglected. Because most of the people who came to pick up the bride were his brother or uncle, and he had to be the one who understood the scene best. In order to welcome this big guest, the man had to prepare for Zhang Luo a few days ago, and he also had to arrange a decent and status person, who also had to drink and persuade him to drink, and he could also say that he could.
In short, a purpose is to accompany this guest well, drink enough wine, and eat well. Achieve the satisfaction of the other party. Of course, there is also a competition between the two parties of this host and guest, that is, the guest who accompanies the guest not only accompanies the guest's wine well, but he will never get drunk. On the guest side, there must also be a huge amount, otherwise three glasses of wine will go under the table, which is a shame. Therefore, the smart guest will definitely grasp this degree, have the ability, and pour the drink that accompanies the wine, which is even more skilled.
For example, after giving birth to a child for ten days, the mother's family sends Zhumi; whoever marries a daughter-in-law in the same clan will go to invite the new couple to their own home for a meal to show their affection and show their proximity. In short, this unique and simple hospitality of Zaozhuang has become a living culture and a custom charm, which cannot be exhausted here.
This article was first published in the Zaozhuang Archives, and reprinted to spread more local culture.