The so-called scumbag is a master of reducing costs and increasing efficiency.
They may be the negative man who throws away the bad chaff, the phoenix man who forgets his roots after climbing the high branches, the sea king who seamlessly connects with his new girlfriend, the cheating man who is emotionally unfaithful, and the more extreme is the abuser in the wife murder case and the domestic violence case.
In history, film and television, literature and art, there are such concrete presentations of love scum:
For example, Liang Zhengxian in "Thirty Only", Wang Anxu in "Painted Skin", and the negative man who played with Du Shi Niang......
But as Mr. Jin Yucheng, the author of "Flowers", said:
"People themselves are very complex things, this is also a scumbag, you take such a complex change in human nature, and cover it in such an imbecile sentence, it's too naïve and pitiful. ”
That's right, people are multifaceted, and the state in the relationship is also ever-changing.
Simply labeling or characterizing a person as "scum" or "bad" is too crude and arbitrary.
So how do we identify (potential) scumbags?
Before discussing scumbags, we might as well think further: what is a scumbag.
Such as selfishness, violent tendencies, twilight, flirting on social media...... These are the characteristics of a scumbag, but they are not the essence of a scumbag.
From my experience, the so-called scumbag is a master of reducing costs and increasing efficiency. They want to get the maximum (sex, money, power) value from women through the lowest cost (time, energy, money, etc.) through deception, brainwashing, etc., under the guise of love or marriage.
In short, they need to be profitable on you, and they need to take advantage of you, so that even if they are separated, they will not lose money.
So what is the essence of a scumbag?
They have a "servile mentality" in their bones, which makes them act from the point of "self-interest".
Scumbags regard the relationship as the control, oppression, and exploitation of the superior to the subordinate, and this kind of upper to lower may be accompanied by invisible PUA, pie painting, etc., so that your relationship is unbalanced.
He is good at instrumentalizing and utilitarianizing people, and playing games in the relationship between the sexes to achieve the purpose of being used by me.
Because of this, they don't treat people equally, and they don't know what respect is.
In life, they bow down to the top and step on the low, revere the strong and despise the weak.
If the girl's resources are superior to herself, she can be a soft bone to lick the dog, and if the conditions are under herself, she may take the opportunity to oppress, ridicule, and belittle from time to time, and give all kinds of demands and instructions to show off the superiority of the master.
In short, his "servile thinking" makes him unable to respect and look at others equally, let alone love another person.
Explained in this way, combined with news figures or novels and TV series, it is easy to understand the various behaviors of scumbags, such as Lin Shengbin, Mu Linhan, Huo Zun, etc.
They will not be ashamed of scum, or even show off their capital, just like the senior brother prostituted the armor of the Dragon Palace.
Thinking about it further, where is the root of this scumbag thinking?
Mr. Lu Xun said in "Writing Under the Lamp": "We ourselves have already been properly arranged, there are noble and low, large and small, up and down. You are abused by others, but you can also abuse others. Level by level, I can't move, and I don't want to move. ”
This passage bluntly criticizes the inequality of society in the past, to the point that ordinary men can only oppress their wives and children.
What about women who are wives? So they became "daughters-in-law for thousands of years" and began to bully their daughters-in-law.
In this way, let's go back and look at the story of "Tianxian Pei", why Dong Yong peeped at the fairy taking a bath and secretly hid the clothes of the human girl, this series of saucy operations actually captured the heart of the beauty and returned to the beauty.
Why does a low-class man peek at a high-class woman taking a bath, and still have children and reach the pinnacle of life?
This kind of story has been passed down to this day, how did its vertical users brainwash everyone?
It turned out to be the ideal love of the great cross-class.
But is this obviously a crime story of a scumbag who has nothing prostitutes, a fairy for nothing, and finally earns blood?
Sexual harassment ➕, theft ➕, indecency ➕, trafficking in women ➕, illegal detention......
Punish you for all the crimes.
I despise female scumbags as equals, but that's not the point. The point is that I hope to see the essence through the phenomenon, expose the emotional truth, and avoid detours.
I didn't meet someone I really loved until I was 30 years old, and I was also hurt by scumbags. But I never benchmark my personal experience to all the men in the marriage market, I believe that there are good men.
Just like Romain Rolland said: True heroism is to see the truth of the world and still love life.
What is the truth of the world?
It is the unspeakable gray area of human nature, the unspoken rules of human feelings, and the unfairness of the system and structure......
However, the world below the iceberg is also a part of the iceberg.
That's the cruelty of life and the emotional world, but I still see the light in the cracks.
I hope that you will improve your ability to recognize people and live this life well. It's not easy for ordinary people, it's just three meals and four seasons, and when he's tired, he can chat with you and borrow a shoulder to snuggle up to each other.
And the road to happiness is made by ourselves.
Light up and watch, may we all have a good intimate relationship.
Today, I will briefly share it here, thank you for lighting up the star account at the end of the article and supporting my creation.
I'll bring more boutique thinking.
If you have something to say to me, welcome to me. It's not easy to be more literate outside of work, and follow me to grow into a better and more powerful woman together.
Source: "Tess"
【About the Author】
Xu Ailing: Intimate relationships, women's growth, and no gossip, aiming to interpret women's topics through entertainment, film and television. Follow me to level up and fight monsters together. Post at 9 p.m., remember to star me.
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