Recently, I took the time to watch Teacher Dong's live broadcast playback a few days ago, and there was a paragraph of the book he recommended Zhang Ailing, and analyzing Zhang Ailing's words made me feel mixed feelings...
I have never read Zhang Ailing's books, because it is rumored that most of her writing is about emotions, and most of the style is sad. So I didn't think about going over and looking at it before. But after Mr. Dong's wonderful explanation, I think it's worth seeing!
1️⃣ He said that after watching Zhang Ailing, he once had a very deep doubt about love and human nature, and even refused to trust anyone for a while.
2️⃣, he analyzed Zhang Ailing's life like four seasons, from being born in a very wealthy family in childhood, to the great changes in her life, the baptism in the war, and the influence of the people around her on her, shaping her later views on the world, love, and life. From Zhang Ailing's family education, living environment and experience, he analyzed Zhang Ailing's father's influence on her personality. As a result, she lacks security in adulthood, and often maintains a kind of confrontation and independence with others, silent, arrogant, and unsympathetic. This sad undertone that led to her pervades almost all of her works. Because of her relationship with her father, she always didn't know how to measure men.
3️⃣, Teacher Dong gave an example: "If you find that the girl around you can't get along with her father when she is young, the girl will grow up with an extreme, or extreme disgust, completely away from men; Or they will lose themselves and deliberately please men.
(OS: Hearing this, my heart is sad, as if I see my own shadow. Personally, I am also a person who has not been able to get along with my father since I was a child. And I may be biased towards the former, not completely away, but always intentionally or unintentionally alienated. ）
4️⃣, he said that in Zhang Ailing's growth experience, he felt that an adolescent girl, when she paid the most attention to her appearance and wanted to be glamorous, wore the old clothes that her stepmother had remarried. Those worn, ill-fitting, dressed in particularly twisted clothes, like an iron chain, locked in the longing that a young girl should have. So why does it always seem strange to wear clothes after she becomes famous, a kind of pain that is not at the right time, always unequal, always not stretching, always unhappy, always unnatural!
Therefore, she wrote a lot of obsessive men and women in her book, most of which are some unstretched love, or not very reasonable family relationships. The story she writes, like her personally, is a special case, she doesn't belong to any genre, she writes about herself! It is the times that created Zhang Ailing, and Zhang Ailing also wrote about the chaos in an era, so she is always criticizing human nature!
5️⃣ When he explained "Red Rose and White Rose", he concluded:
Many people's ultimate character shortcomings are determined by the environment in which they are raised. If you are always being picked, blamed, and denied by your parents when you are a child, this person will have an extremely strong sense of insecurity from an early age. Especially between the opposite sex, such as father to daughter or mother to son, this will cause a strong regret that you cannot get along with the opposite sex, which will become a personality defect when you grow up.
6️He encourages children to read novels, but guide children to distinguish between fiction and reality, do not get stuck in it all the time, and do not have to be anyone in the novel. Just let children understand people's love and hate, understand the joys and sorrows of the world, empathize and understand the emotions of others, you can also have a more accurate grasp of people's joys, angers and sorrows, so you will also know better how to get along with people.
7️⃣, Yuhui may feel that he doesn't know much about love, so he said that he didn't know how to cut into talking about Zhang Ailing's book, so he tried to talk about it from the perspective of a person's mental health and a family education. And it is precisely from these dimensions to expound that the intention of the work is elevated! Although everyone often says that Yuhui is a love theorist, I have to say that the direction he says can always reveal some extremely essential things in love. After he said this, it was violently resonated, and I seemed to see my own shadow growing up and my character flaws when I grew up.
8️⃣, Feng Tang wrote in "The Growth of All Things": "You are quite pessimistic, but not thorough, that's why you screw up." "Maybe sometimes it takes us a long time to recognize the scars that our deformed upbringing has created on our bodies. So that I have been living too screwed, and in this state of screwing, we are a little confused whether it is ourselves or the environment that is wrong.
⭐️ If a work can see itself like a mirror, and we can't change the past, then avoid falling into a similar historical river; Reading different books and novels may be able to alert yourself, find yourself, push yourself, correct yourself, rewrite your destiny, and strive to be the best version of yourself!
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