Writer Zhang Ailing once said: "If you understand the past me, you will understand the current me." ”
If you don't look at Xiao Hong from her childhood experience, from her stubborn personality, and from her personal encounters, the word "being a woman" is taken for granted.
Rather than saying that Xiao Hong is a woman, it is better to say that she is an unfortunate woman who has pursued love all her life, but has always been undesirable.
Tang Wei played Xiao Hong in "Golden Age"
①
Xiao Hong was born into a landlord family in Hulan County, Heilongjiang Province, and her mother died when she was 9 years old, and she was framed by her father's indifference and stepmother's childhood. His father was miserly, distant, and ruthless in his dealings with his servants and his children.
For Xiao Hong, the only bit of warmth comes from her grandfather's care.
There is a famous saying in psychology: "A happy childhood heals a lifetime, and an unhappy childhood heals all your life." ”
The tragedy of Xiao Hong's fate is driven by the tragedy of personality, and it is also caused by the lack of emotions in the original family. Children who lack love are always easily moved by the slightest warmth of others. They always have an inferiority complex that they don't deserve to have, they don't deserve to get it.
Xiao Hong, played by Tang Wei
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At the age of 14, Xiao Hong was led by her father and promised to Wang Enjia, the second son of Wang Tinglan, the first helper of the provincial defense army. Wang Enjia belongs to the dumb boy and is an addict who likes to smoke opium.
In order to oppose arranged marriages, with the encouragement of her cousin Lu Zhenshun, she ran away from home and went to Beijing to live together. So began her life of displacement and starvation.
However, Xiao Hong's exodus cut off the family's financial support; Lu Zhenshun soon received an "ultimatum" from his family. Under the pressure of his family, Lu Zhenshun chose to surrender. She was abandoned.
If it is the pressure of the family, it is better to say that it is the difficult living conditions, so that Lu Zhenshun retreated and chose to give up. A man who lacks responsibility naturally cannot give her the comfort of a stable life and emotions.
This is the first time that Xiao Hong has been abandoned by a man.
③
After Lu Zhenshun left, Xiao Hong was wandering in Harbin for more than a month, hungry and cold, she met her ex-fiancé, in order not to freeze to death on the street, she and Wang Enjia lived together. In a Dongxing hotel in Harbin, the two live here.
In the Spring Festival of 1932, Wang Enjia's mother knew that her son was with Xiao Hong, so she cut off financial support, and Wang had to compromise with the family.
Wang Enjia left the hotel on the pretext of going home to collect the money. Left a 600 yuan accommodation debt to Xiao Hong, who is pregnant with Liujia.
Once again, she was abandoned by men.
This is the tragedy that the times have brought to a woman. Women must survive on men. They cannot earn themselves a decent economic income while pursuing freedom. There is freedom without money, there is material freedom without freedom.
Wang Enjia in the film and television drama
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When trapped in the hotel, Xiao Hong asked Pei Xinyuan, the deputy editor of Harbin's "International Association Daily", for help, and Xiao Jun, Shu Qun and other literary youths visited Xiao Hong in the hotel.
Xiao Jun was touched by Xiao Hong's little poem, and they were together. In August of the same year, the Songhua River broke its banks, and the water flooded the city. Xiao Jun took advantage of the night to rent a small boat and rescued Xiao Hong with a rope. Xiao Hong was sent to the hospital for delivery, because she had no money to pay the hospitalization fee, Xiao Jun forced the doctor to save people with a knife. After the child is born, it is given away because it is unable to support it.
After Xiao Hong and Xiao Jun were together, they were often in hunger, and basic three meals a day could not be guaranteed. For Xiao Hong, who has been seeking emotional sustenance all her life, the material barrenness is something she does not care about. What she cared about was Xiao Jun's denial of her talent.
The macho Xiao Jun could not bear that Xiao Hong's writing talent overshadowed himself. After xiao hong's "The Legend of Hulan River" and "The Field of Life and Death" came out, the contradiction of Erxiao developed to its peak.
Xiao Jun not only cheated, but also added fists and feet to Xiao Hong. When Xiao Hong pretended to outsiders that the wound on his face was a fall, Xiao Jun said unashamedly: Don't don't want your face, obviously I hit it.
This time of emotional experience, Xiao Jun did not abandon her, but trampled on her. As the rift between the two becomes a trench, it is inevitable to go their separate ways.
Xiao Hong and Xiao Jun
⑤
Later, Xiao Hong and Duanmu Hongliang came together. When she met Xiao Jun, Xiao Hong was pregnant with Wang Enjia's child. When she married Duanmu Hongliang, she was pregnant with Xiao Jun's child. The intertwining of fates was doomed from the very beginning.
In April 1938, Hu Feng, who presided over the wedding, proposed that the newlyweds fall in love, and Xiao Hong confessed:
Xiao Hong's simple desire for life was shattered by the war.
Shortly after the marriage of the two, the Japanese army bombed Wuhan, duanmu Hongliang as a war correspondent, leaving the pregnant Xiao Hong, alone to Chongqing. Later, Xiao Hong went through hardships and arrived in Chongqing. At the end of 1938, Xiao Hong gave birth to a son in the Bai Lang family, and the child died on the fourth day after childbirth. Later, Xiao Hong left Chongqing with Duanmu Hongliang and flew to Hong Kong. After the fall of Hong Kong, Xiao Hong agreed to evacuate him first, so he left Xiao Hong and fled alone. In her letter to a friend, she wrote:
This is Xiao Hong, the third time she has been abandoned.
Duanmu Hongliang
⑥
In Hong Kong, Xiao Hong suffered from tuberculosis and was misdiagnosed as a laryngeal tumor, which brought more pain and suffering after the operation. At this time, accompanying her bedside was not her husband Duanmu Hongliang, but her friend Luo Binji.
He couldn't understand, so he asked Xiao Hong, "How can such a person live together for three or four years?" ”
She said:
Xiao Hong