"What determines a child's life is not academic performance, but sound personality cultivation. To develop a healthy personality, the first thing parents need to do is to change the tone and way of speaking. —Cai Yuanpei, "The Cultivation of Chinese"
Some parents educate their children, they like to insult him, the dog he scolds is bloody, nothing, but they don't know that the child was born to you, scolding him is scolding yourself, you yourself look down on your own child, how do you expect others to look at him.
Children who are abused by you will have no self-esteem, and when they interact with others, they will be very timid and afraid of things, thinking that they will be inferior to others. Scientists have done an experiment to prepare two pots of flowers, one pot to praise it, one pot to it, scolding, and the result is that the flowers of the praised flower are more vivid than the flowers that are often scolded, which shows the horror of verbal violence. It will gradually take root in the young mind, and eventually the flower of other people's evil inferiority.
Each child has its own unique advantages, but also has its own shortcomings, advantages to praise, shortcomings to guide, instead of seeing your child's poor academic performance, to accuse him of not working hard, but to ignore his usual well-behaved, obedient, hardworking qualities, and do not see other people's children better than your children, just say in front of him similar to how I gave birth to you such a thing.
Especially do not insult their children in front of the guests, some parents like this, their practice is to prove in front of the guests, they are raising children, save others say that his children are not raised, but this practice, on the contrary, will be easier to disgust than their own face-to-face abuse, more able to hurt the child's self-esteem. A child's sound personality needs to be cultivated, but insults are definitely not conducive to the cultivation of a sound personality. If you do something wrong, or do something that is not what your parents want, you should also criticize tactfully, rather than a stinky scolding that covers your face as soon as you open your mouth.
Perhaps your simple words of encouragement will make your child more confident, more courageous, will continue to surpass himself and make better results, but you will be angry and yelling because of a little thing, but it will make the child worse and worse. And it is said that children who are often abused will become more and more stupid.