Zhang Jie and puppy Laura
On the night of the end of the Spring Festival holiday, I accidentally saw the news of the death of the writer Zhang Jie in the United States on January 21 from WeChat, and I suddenly fell into a complicated feeling...
Zhang Jie's works have grown up with our generation. In other words, our generation grew up reading the excellent works of Zhang Jie's generation of writers.
Looking back, on the trajectory of my life, I once had two small intersections with Zhang Jie.
For the first time in the early 1990s, Shanghai Television produced a program for Zhang Jie, using MTV to read and disseminate Zhang Jie's literary works, which were selected by Zhang Jie and the program team director together, and were fragments of her prose and novel works, accompanied by music and pictures. The program team approached me and wanted me to be a reader in the work. They said that Zhang Jie wanted me to read her work.
At that time, I was relatively unfamiliar with this form of shooting, but I felt that it was new. I asked the director, what kind of format will this show take when it is broadcast? He said it was in the form of MTV, but the content was literary, not entertaining songs. The choreographer also said that Zhang Jie himself may appear on the screen during post-production, superimposed with the text content read aloud... Such a fresh form of expression appealed to me, and I agreed with a mouthful.
I remember that during that time, Zhang Jie seemed to be abroad, and I never saw Zhang Jie during the recording of the program. The shooting location was in a studio in downtown Shanghai, and I stood alone, or sat, reading her works aloud, one by one... In the past few days, I have been reading articles by literary circles commemorating Zhang Jie from WeChat, and I have repeatedly appeared in my mind to record this set of programs in that small studio, lingering, as if I was reliving the feeling of eagerly reading the novel literary works in literary journals when I was young.
After the recording of the literary MTV program was completed, I participated in another filming task and never paid attention to the information of the official broadcast of the program. At that time, there were no smartphones, and the messages were relatively closed. One night, around ten o'clock, I was leaning on my bed to read a book, and the phone at home rang, and it turned out to be Zhang Jie's transoceanic call from abroad. After she introduced herself, she told me that she had asked for my family's phone number from the director of the show, and told me that she had watched the video tape of the show that the TV station trustee had given her, and she was very satisfied with my understanding and reading of her work. Zhang Jie's attitude is kind and natural, just like a very familiar old friend pulling a family routine, and there is no sense of conservatism given by those legendary "talented women". We didn't talk long on the phone, but had a great time. Before hanging up, she also deliberately left me her contact number abroad.
And so it took another decade. In the early years of the new century, I participated in the film "Judge's Mother" by Beijing Forbidden City Film Company, directed by Mu Deyuan, and starring female judge An Hui. This film was later commended by the publicity system of the Beijing Municipal Party Committee, and I went to Beijing on behalf of the film production team to participate in the commendation meeting. Coincidentally, That year, Zhang Jie's new work "No Words" was also commended at the same time. We met at the recognition ceremony. This is my second intersection with Zhang Jie. At that time, the conference had ended, people were hurrying out, the corridor was a little crowded, Zhang Jie's foot seemed to be injured, and she was in a wheelchair, allowing people to slowly push out. In an instant, we looked at each other and recognized each other.
In fact, we already knew that we were both honored in the venue, but we didn't expect to meet in such an unexpected way. Our eyes are full of surprises. She immediately asked the person pushing the wheelchair to stop, and I was overjoyed, walked up and shouted: Teacher Zhang Jie; she also immediately called out my name. It was in such a noisy environment that we had a brief exchange. Although ten years have passed since we called across the ocean to this moment, although we do not seem to have the intention of preparing to meet here, both of us are somewhat introverted, and we cannot express our inner feelings in more words when we first meet, but we all clearly feel each other's sincere joy.
That year, Zhang Jie was about the year of her ear, and her demeanor and speech exuded the elegant atmosphere of an intellectual woman, so that she did not lose her measure, and was full of the energy of beautiful life. That day, we hurriedly met, hurriedly said goodbye, and I stood where I was, watching her in a wheelchair, being pushed away... I stared for a long, long time.
From the late 1970s to the 1980s and 1990s, our generation of artists grew up in a blossoming literary atmosphere. Zhang Jie's generation of writers is actually only more than ten years older than us, at most twenty years older, and we can be counted as literary and artistic workers of the same era. But in terms of habit, we regard them as the writers of our predecessors, who led the new wave of literature to cut through thorns and new roads, and shared with us the lessons of courage, pain and even failure that constantly aroused controversy and attention, taught us our understanding of the times and lives, and helped us grow and mature.
We often say that we grew up reading the work of their generation. But I also believe that their generation of writers really need the love and reading of our generation of relatively young readers, peers, and followers, who are working hard in the love and support of young readers, constantly adjusting their creative ability to make themselves from excellent to better. The literary creation of Zhang Jie's generation of outstanding writers is mature in the era when young people of our generation are striving to get rid of naivety and striving to make progress, and our two generations have matured together and plunged into the sacred cause of literature and art together. The art group portraits and literary worlds they create will feel as intimate when we read them, as if we were familiar with our own inner pursuits. Especially for an artist like me, the literary creation of excellent writers often becomes the nourishment and trigger point of artistic creation, and literature and art have a natural bloodline.
Xi Meijuan close up
In the days that followed, we never met again, but I have been reading Zhang Jie's creations intermittently, and her later works have some complicated feelings and heavy words, and I can't read them in one breath, such as "No Words" occasionally. Those literary images and narratives always hit my soul hard, making me have to stop reading, and sometimes, while taking a break, I hope to have a deeper understanding of the work...
Now the writer I love is gone. For some reason, these days my mind will endlessly churn over the years when I read literary works and absorb the literary ideals provided by writers and grow up, the years of youth.
Written in 2022, 2, 9
Author: Xi Meijuan
Editor: Qian Yutong
Editor-in-Charge: Shu Ming
*Wenhui exclusive manuscript, please indicate the source when reprinting.