The passion and revelry of 2022 is given by the Winter Olympics, and the romance and emotion of 2022 are given by the Winter Olympics. From the most romantic Chinese-style opening ceremony, to a hard-to-find ice pier, to Su Yiming's 1800-degree five-turn body completed in the snowboard men's slope steeplechase final, the short track speed skating team won the gold, and Gu Ailing won the gold medal for China... On the ice and snow field, Chinese full of passion again and again.
(Gu Ailing Competition)
Gu Ailing has written too many times, no need to repeat, that is, the school bully + champion + gold sucking king + other people's children. Gu Ailing, the biggest secret of this genius girl is actually... Get enough sleep for 10 hours a day?
How remarkable Su Yiming is
Su Yiming, a 17-year-old Chinese teenager, has also taken over the hot search in the past few days, using the highest difficulty of the whole field 1800 degrees to get the highest score of 86.80 with a perfect movement, and finally overwhelmed many masters including the defending champion American star Redmond Gerrard with the first place in the qualification round, becoming the first Chinese athlete to advance to the final of the snowboard slope barrier at the Beijing Winter Olympics, and won China's first snowboarding medal. At the age of 4, he learned to ski, at the age of 7, he signed a contract with a famous snowboarding brand and became a professional skater, and at the age of 14, he was selected for the national team and began to win gold medals in the same year.
At the age of 15, Su Yiming stepped onto the world stage and swept the champions of championships around the world, becoming the champion miaozi of the most anticipated champion. While training in Austria, Su Yiming also successfully completed the ultra-difficult action of the inner turn 1980 grab plate, becoming the first person in the world and receiving Guinness Book of Records certification.
Su Yiming also has an actor identity, and was once a small plug in the movie "Wise Tiger Mountain" directed by Xu Ke;
Netizens exclaimed: "The richness of other people's 17 and 18 years old, I can't catch up in my life!" "Everyone is amazed at what kind of family raises such a good child.
How excellence is cultivated
The success of Gu Ailing, Su Yiming and Chen Wei cannot be copied, after all, it brings together the heavens, places, and people. Every child is unique. It is undeniable that there must be talent in becoming a world champion at a young age and excelling in a certain field. But if talent alone is not enough to make a good card into a king bomb. Take the educational concept that everyone pays attention to this time, which is not as simple as it seems on the surface. Families in all countries have to experience fierce competition for scarce resources for education and employment. China has tiger mothers and chicken babies, extracurricular tutoring (now double subtracted, parents personally on the battlefield) and the militarized Management of Hengshui Middle School; in the United States, in addition to the herding mass happiness education, there are also the magic 4 rules of California Whitney Middle School. In the book "What Is The Best Middle School in America," it's written that "4 is a magic number: 4 hours of sleep + 4 cups of latte + 4.0 GPA." ”
Whether it is sports or learning, no matter how good the talent advantage, it is inseparable from the payment. Diligence and hard work are an important path for human progress.
Now the sound of pure "talent" and "spelling daddy" is becoming less and less, or rather, everyone is more and more recognizing these laws:
1. Money is useful, but not absolute. The success of education must be inseparable from time, dedication, diligence and systematic thinking.
2. IQ genetics, but emotional intelligence, personality and mind, is really infiltrated by the environment, words and deeds.
3. Genius is 1% talent + 99% effort, no matter how good the parents are, the process of hard work and challenge is irreplaceable.
4. The cow can rely on genes at a time, and the cow I can only rely on himself. Rather than chance, continuous excellence is self-transcendence.
To put it bluntly, how can it be naturally strong to give a child more money, to leave the support and love of a generation or generations, to leave the guidance and professionalism? Life is really a marathon, the admission ticket gives the opportunity, and the second half is all on your own! There are even more cruel, three generations of people, or N generations, generations of diligence, wisdom, hard work, why are the children raised bad? Family heirloom is also a treasure left by traditional Chinese culture in the previous year. From an economic point of view, a stock, people have been stable for 100 years, high open and high continue to shine, you suddenly kill into it and want to open and hang all the way, can it last? Liang Qichao's nine sons are all talented, the four academicians of the Zhong Nanshan family are full of scholars, and the powerful people all appear as a family unit. Where are the shortcuts in life? However, the wisdom passed down from generation to generation, the company of full acceptance, the effort to grow up shoulder to shoulder, and the overflow of love, and the respect for the child's own destiny. Of course, children and children are very different, the vast majority of ordinary people can not put down the "investment" of the return mentality to raise children, then accept ------ we use 99% of the way to raise children, do not expect 1% of the results. Su Yiming's parents never wanted to force their children to become the best on skiing. In the eyes of parents, whether the child is happy or not, whether he likes it or not is the most core part of determining Su Yiming's future career. Rather than supervising education, Su Yiming's mother prefers timely guidance. When Su Yiming was seven years old, he suffered a serious leg injury at the ski resort, which caused him to fracture his thigh. Seeing her son lying on the hospital bed, Su Yiming's mother flashed the idea of letting the child give up in an instant, but she quickly woke up and must not let the child develop the habit of giving up easily. The child had just finished the operation, and the first thing his mother said to him was, "Baby, we can't give up skiing because of this setback." ”
Su Yiming also understands more and more that suffering and injury are common things that he must experience after choosing to ski, and injuries should not only not be flinched, but should also be seen as a good opportunity for review.
Courageous choices, and bearing the consequences, are even more costly in education. How much power, how much support, self-growth instead of consuming the child. No: other people's children are naturally tough. Rather: other people's children, other people's mothers, other people's generations continue to shine. People who are better than you are working harder. Let the child see the efforts of "others" from an early age, to see the self-growth behind the glory, rather than spitting out "spelling daddy". Parents with a growth mindset can have positive, optimistic and strong children.
Education is not about copying
The ridicule of netizens is really "characteristic", not only Chinese families, parents around the world are very concerned about their children's growth, and they are eager to "copy success".
It is more difficult to allow children to be ordinary, to allow children to "not compare with others", than to teach children to "work hard". Gu Ailing, Su Yiming, Yusheng Knot... Every talented athlete is great, worthy of praise and praise, but not necessarily worthy of all parents as a textbook. Gu Ailing's family background is indeed difficult for many people to reach, but the environment is not the only factor that determines the success of students, a champion like Fan Kexin, who grew up in the basement, can't even afford a decent pair of skates... The emergence of takako out of the cold door is also another uncommon phenomenon. What is worth learning is never the parenting concept that is verbally expressed, but the long-lasting companionship, dedication and support under the lights. Gu Ailing said from the bottom of her heart in an interview: I know that all children think that their mother is the best, but I really think my mother is the best, because she has done a lot more than other mothers, and she still does it alone...
Because the result of respecting, accepting, and supporting the child from the heart is not necessarily "making the child successful", but letting the child "become the person of his own definition". This reminds me of the Olympic champion Deng Yaping we know, it is reasonable to say that Deng Yaping played table tennis so well, her son must not be bad, but her son Lin Hanming refused to play table tennis since he was a child, and Deng Yaping's attitude is to respect children.
But the blossoms are elsewhere, Deng Yaping's son, who chose e-sports, is outstanding. Deng Yaping just said, "I'm going to fight with him too, and see what it is?" "Just let the vast majority of parents see the gap between respect and control."
Allowing children to be excellent, allowing children not to be excellent, allowing children to be different from their own excellence, is really homework.
See the contingency and inevitability
To tell you the truth about the annoying: Friendly reminder: Any achievement is not just an "individual" success, but a systematic time and place. Talent, hard work, family... These contingencies and inevitability are indispensable. Take the Winter Olympic champions:
inevitability:
1. Ice and snow sports, most of which belong to the nobility sports, the high tuition fee dissuads too many people.
2. Parental bullying, three generations of cattle people, and the attention and support of the family system are the advantages of these high-starting families.
3. Mother's emotional intelligence, pattern, wisdom, effort, feminist perspective, is an excellent nourishment for children.
4. Transnational growth experience, whether it is studying in China or training overseas, the vision, diversity and empathy of these athletes are all online.
5. Many "cow babies", when they were young, participated in enough sports and art projects to lock in the super long version.
6. The elite education system also relies on the absolute educational input of parents and sufficient emotional companionship.
contingency:
1. Talent, talent, talent.
2. Extremely passionate about the project in the snow and ice.
3. Diversified growth background, catching up with the Beijing Winter Olympics, the growth cycle of athletes is too critical, and the chosen people are at a certain age, not the "golden age", it is time-changing.
4. The new generation after 00, the comprehensive strength is open, the expression, achievements, and resume are excellent, and there are more opportunities for self-presentation.
5. "Idol empty window", the risk of actors' top streams is much higher than that of sports stars, and commercial value will also push back public opinion. Top sports superstars have long been a business model, not just personality charm. Marketing boost is also a good wind.
In this comparison, no matter which field of success, it is a natural time and place, and it is indispensable. No acid, no sweat, accept your own characteristics, become the best version of yourself, it is enough! As long as parents see the accident and inevitability of the education system, rather than just learning the concept of two family education, they stop here, complain about themselves, and even become a "new type of anxiety". He is the stone of the mountain and can attack jade. Look at the growth path of different people to know where the road is. After all, no one can grow up by the instruction manual, and no one's success is worth copying. It is enough to help children find love, do a good job of inevitability, accept the results of chance, and let children become "their own winners"! You don't have to just listen to "moves", look at internal skills.
Write at the end
The French sculptor Rodin once said: "Genius? There is absolutely no such thing, there is only hard work, methods and constant planning. A good educational story should be "enlightening", a stone of his mountain, a reference that can be tapped, not another degree of anxiety, another degree of dogma. Don't turn "the excellence of others" into a new pressure ~ Confucius said, we must teach according to our aptitudes. After all, we can't copy anyone, but the enlightenment to us is that parents are partners in their children, and they must go with the flow when they cultivate their children. All roads lead to Rome, and every child can have his own Rome. Children love, happy, free, enjoy, create... More important than achieving "standard definition of success". Then again, the best people succeed by the way. Please yourself first, please others by the way.
Allowing children to live their lives in the way they love, and being a mother who "does not require children to be as successful as others" is the meaning of "others".