I heard a very extreme story, saying that it was a very good woman, who went on a trip abroad, was accidentally raped on the way, she immediately kept the evidence, called the police, and after dealing with the matter, she continued to travel...
Many people feel strange, she said, this does not blame me, why should I go back to China immediately, and then cry and cry?
I was shocked and awestruck by her calmness and toughness.
I've also heard of another extreme example of a female college student from a poor family who was cheated on her tuition and ended up dying of sadness (suicide).
Two extreme examples, two very different outcomes. How do we understand the wonderful thing of life? How much is our physiological endurance?
Some people say that "Tarzan does not change color before it collapses", and some people say that "it is a straw" that overwhelms people. In fact, different psychological endurances represent our pattern in a sense.
When difficult things come, the worst choice is to be sad, and sadness may lead to some bad results, complaining about others and blaming yourself are unnecessary and useless.
The first thing to do in this case should be "just in time to stop loss". See if there is a way to solve it, or not to let the situation continue to deteriorate.
The second thing is to "reflect on yourself" instead of blaming yourself. Self-blame and reflection are two different concepts, self-blame is to blame oneself, and reflection is to increase the lessons learned so that such bad events are no longer staged. Sadly, a lot of people who blame themselves are not improving, and they replace self-evolution with self-blame, which is really pitiful.
