The worst doctor of the year came out: the evil relationship with the mentor, 4 years dragged into 6 years, the body collapsed...

Source: House of Stewardship

Doctoral student Lao Zhang received a call from his supervisor last week, hoping that he would voluntarily withdraw from school for the sake of his mentor's imminent retirement, and the moment when it was time to come finally came. This means that he may become a doctoral student in the industry, the blow, it goes without saying, you know, Lao Zhang is over thirty years old, this year is the sixth year of doctoral study, this six years of inaction has long diluted the glory of his just entered the 985 schools in Beijing, graduate school life to bring him the basic in addition to "busy" is a meager survival income. At the last moment of graduate school, he no longer had any hope, and not delaying the retirement of his supervisor because of himself may be his last residual value.

An unspeakable "evil fate": often scolded by the teacher

The encounter between doctoral student Lao Zhang and his supervisor was a bad relationship. If he did it again, Lao Zhang would definitely prevent himself from making any contact with the mentor to avoid causing unnecessary troubles to both sides.

Everyone's impression of the person they get along with is different, even polarized, before choosing a tutor, Lao Zhang happened to contact the teacher's favorite student, after a remark, Lao Zhang sent an email to the tutor, and the tutor finally agreed to be included in the comparison and selection of several students. Later, I inadvertently heard the opposite evaluation of people from other students and friends at at least three schools, but Lao Zhang came to do academics and publish papers, as long as the teacher guided the academics, how people had to have a relationship with him.

However, Lao Zhang was too naïve, from the beginning of entering the school, the tutor arranged a propositional thesis for Lao Zhang, Lao Zhang prepared in the direction of the small thesis according to the topic, and the result was criticized by the teacher, and then told Lao Zhang that the topic he said last time was the title of his graduation thesis; Lao Zhang should make a general evaluation of the thesis of the scene (the tutor asked to learn) truthfully, and he would also be scolded; for the works and lectures that were required to be read or studied, he would also be scolded.

No matter how hard Lao Zhang tries to achieve the effect that the teacher wants, Lao Zhang is like a teacher's pump, almost every week will be criticized, once it is not in line with the teacher's wishes, the teacher will count his various crimes every time he criticizes, criticize him for not loving to read, read bad books, have no scientific research ability, why do you want to come to read a doctorate, tell him that the supervisor should modify the thesis for master's students instead of doctoral students, etc., so Lao Zhang will lose sleep every week because of the criticism of the tutor, criticism - self-regulation - and then criticism - Self-regulation has become the norm for Lao Zhang.

During his doctoral studies, Lao Zhang actually faced various pressures in his life, which can also be said to be the period of the greatest pressure and uncertainty in life. Although the teacher's criticism is for Lao Zhang to improve in the criticism, in the school, in fact, the teacher's criticism has become the only source of fear or negativity for Lao Zhang, the pressure given has far exceeded the pressure of academics, frequent verbal destruction, instead of the growth that the tutor or Lao Zhang hopes, but has been checked out for heart disease, even if he is sick, he is afraid to tell the teacher, afraid of being scolded by him, and has fallen into a deep vicious cycle.

Distant health: Physical illness is entangled and deteriorating

Doctoral student Lao Zhang does not want to be criticized by teachers, but also wants to change the status quo. So he got up at seven or eight o'clock every day to go to the library to take a seat to study, in order to have more study time, even without a mobile phone, in addition to eating and sleeping is facing the computer or books.

He did not have the concept of the weekend in his mind, every day was equal to a working day, he had to sit for at least ten hours a day, and over time, the old Zhang's cervical spine began to ache, the lumbar spine changed from a mild bulge at the beginning to a moderate to severe herniation, and he did CT or MRI review every year, even if he went to the gym three or four times a week, he could not reverse or maintain the disease, unless his sedentary lifestyle was changed.

At first, once Lao Zhang's lumbar spondylosis was acute, he could still move during the day, and lie flat and rest for a few days at night; in Bo Er, the pain gradually extended from the waist to the hip, and then spread from the thigh to the ankle, and he could not sleep at night, and he could only recover for a few days through physiotherapy and ointment; and then at bo four, once the disease attacked, Lao Zhang could hardly turn over and get out of bed, and under the dual cure of physiotherapy and ointment, it took at least half a month to temporarily recover, and at the same time, the annual routine physical examination results were worse than the last time. In addition, Lao Zhang also needs to actively exercise to increase the blood supply capacity of the heart so as not to worsen the condition.

Perhaps becoming the saddest "doctoral student", the future is uncertain

Lao Zhang's normal study system is four years, but unconsciously has reached the sixth year, from the beginning of Bo San, he has been worried about his future, on the one hand, because he has not been able to produce results, on the other hand, because of physical reasons can not support him to continue to engage in scientific research. Under normal circumstances, after the completion of the topic from the second degree, the general doctoral student will focus on small papers or start writing large papers, but Lao Zhang not only did not write a good paper in Bo Yi, but also in Bo II is still a futile output, two small papers did not land, large papers did not start, Lao Zhang wrote several papers, but because of quality problems, was killed by the preliminary review or review. Fast forward to BoSi, Lao Zhang has never been able to find the correct entrance to scientific research, and he is more and more incompetent, questioning whether he may not be a material for scientific research. However, every time he came home for the New Year and saw his family's ardent expectations for him, Lao Zhang silently encouraged himself not to give up until the last moment.

In fact, compared with previous doctors, the difficulty of doctoral graduation has become a recognized fact, and the rising demand for articles has made many doctors exhausted physically and mentally. The experience of repeated rejection in the middle, as well as the heartache of being killed many times, made many doctors unable to sleep at night.

Lao Zhang originally wanted to graduate from the doctorate and engage in scientific research for life, however, sitting and reading books and writing papers is bound to aggravate Lao Zhang's cervical and lumbar spine and other diseases, Lao Zhang's physical condition can not support such a working mode, severe lumbar spine disease may lead to paralysis, so he needs to engage in non-sedentary work, by changing the work lifestyle to change physical habits, in order to try to ensure good health and sustainable work. And now, the lack of a future has also cast a deeper shadow on the doctorate.

epilogue

Now, with a phone call from the tutor, Lao Zhang's doctoral career is completely over, as if he has a long dream, as a cannon fodder for graduate students, Lao Zhang is also relieved, it turns out that he is really not suitable for scientific research. There are many people like Lao Zhang, who once had a dream of scientific research, but reality gave a slap in the face, forcibly squeezed into the scientific research track, and finally forced back to the original point and started from scratch. For the optimistic old Zhang, there is still a long way to go, a doctorate is not the whole of life, the doctoral career is over, and the perseverance cultivated during the study period can continue to support him to find another window, another possibility that he can do to the extreme.

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