When the people around you, even yourself, always feel inexplicably depressed without reason.
There is no too serious thing happening, but I just can't find a reason to be happy, but if I really want to let myself say the reason for being unhappy, I can't say the source.
Bad mood is undoubtedly one of the most normal and common characteristics of people with depression.
Some people will define this emotion as "doing" or some people will define it as "pretentious", thinking that they are just idle self-seeking troubles.
If the people around you continue to deny and do not understand, it may exacerbate the depression itself, because the truth is that not to mention the bystander, even the person himself, may not be able to truly understand his inner health and the reasons why he is not happy.
To find a more general explanation, people with depression are usually unhappy not for something specific, but unhappy about their "existence."
To cure people in a depressed state, in addition to finding a professional psychological counselor to do relevant treatment, the support of those around them and the awareness of self-awakening must also be missing.
Therefore, if you want to save the other person with the attitude of "it's all a small matter" or "I'll help you heal", you will definitely have the opposite effect.
So in the face of people in a depressed state, how can we get rid of bad emotions and get more good moods?
Why do people fall into depression like this?
Depressed people are usually not unhappy because of a single thing, but have lost the motivation to be happy, lost hope for the future, and feel endless loneliness and loneliness at the moment. When people have no sense of existence and security, they will be unhappy.
Companionship gives each other warmth and security
So patient companionship is the foundation, far better than too much interfering control and high-profile acts of redemption.
Companionship is not direct treatment, not to teach and discipline interference, but to really let the other party feel that you are on his side, no matter what happens, you will not abandon the side, this kind of companionship may not immediately make the other party show their faces, but can make them feel at ease.
Form a power-assisting relationship
Let's put ourselves in the shoes of people, why are people usually unhappy? Or how can we make the other person happy?
To put it bluntly, it is to lose control of the situation and feel happy, so helping people in depressed states, regaining confidence and finding strength is one of the most important ways to make them happy and happy.
Carl Lansang Rogers, a psychologist known for his "party-centered" approach to psychotherapy, believes that everyone has a positive energy for upward growth in their hearts, so the process of psychotherapy is actually helping clients find their inner strength.
But those superficial chicken soup paragraphs can not play a substantial role, especially for people who are already depressed, it is a little redundant to stand and talk without waist pain, if you want to help this person become happy, then you must learn to play a role in the relationship, let this person set the role to help him find his lost strength and confidence.
People in a depressed state is very easy to self-denial, this time to help him better examine themselves, recognize the reality, but also with a better posture to cope with life, those boring, troublesome, or bad situations can become a test, can also become a journey together.
Rogers argues that helpful relationships are not just a means of psychotherapy, but a mode of getting along that can be widely used in all situations of everyday life. Therefore, only by being good at using the relationship of helpers can we harvest and grow together.
How do you build a supporting relationship?
Sincere and natural and transparent
Usually healthy people who think they are normal are prone to good intentions and bad things, always with a condescending attitude to criticize and even tell each other that you have a disease that needs to be controlled.
You must know that all depressed patients are extremely sensitive, will have higher vigilance and self-preservation psychology than ordinary people, so do not discriminate, treat each other sincerely, get along naturally and be moderately transparent about their hearts. The purer, the more simple and straightforward you are depressed and put yourself in front of the other person, the sooner you will be accepted, trusted, and liked.
Acceptance, appreciation, praise
If you have the opportunity to really delve into depressed people, you will understand that their inner world is extremely lonely and complex, and their brain cell thinking is very active, so brainstorming has now entered any field to brain development and collective management.
So this person is always unhappy and falls into depression, not only does not mean that he is bad, on the contrary, there may be a superior talent.
Depressed people need someone to lead themselves out of the darkness, but also need someone to read a different self, so learn to appreciate his unique, truly accept and sincerely praise, this sense of vanity and empathy that is seen and understood will make depressed patients feel happier than ever.
Empathy
Empathy, often referred to as empathy, refers to the ability to penetrate into the subjective world of others and understand their feelings, even though they do not have common experiences.
Empathy is not bottomless pandering,
Rogers once defined it this way: "Empathy refers to thinking about things from the perspective of others, and it means entering the private cognitive world of others and being completely rooted in them." ”
That is to say, if you want to care about this person, you can't stay in the mind of the bystander to observe and analyze, but you must really enter the other person's world to perceive emotions.
The reason why many clients are repeated over and over again is that most of them are due to the inability of the auxiliary person to give a good atmosphere of help, and sometimes the speed of a person's recovery from depression can also become an indispensable help or resistance factor.
To make the person who has fallen into depression happy, not to buy her a bag or tell people that they want to open something, but to really make some actions that are really helpful to the other party's inner construction.
END
Text/Relief Emotional Station
(Author: Xiao Yu, psychological counselor, focusing on the emotional field), good at the restoration of romantic relationships, marital contradictions and differences, and the healing of psychological trauma caused by the original ecological family. The lonely journey of life, listening to your grievances and pressures, helping visitors improve their skills in getting along with the sexes, saving their lovers, managing their feelings, and striving to become happier people.