A Zen master went on a trip and stayed at a guest house. The shop owner said to him, "I have two wives, one is beautiful and one is ugly, but what I like is that ugly." The Zen master asked, "This."

A Zen master went on a trip and stayed at a guest house.

The shop owner said to him, "I have two wives, one is beautiful and one is ugly, but what I like is that ugly." ”

The Zen master asked, "What is the reason for this?" ”

The shopkeeper said: "The beautiful wife cares too much about her beauty, which makes her ugly; while the other is aware of her own inadequacies, and behaves and looks beautiful inside." ”

In a philosophical sense, "being" and "not" exist at the same time, "being" means you will lose soon, and "no" means you will soon get or will have better compensation. In the story, you may lose it when you realize you are beautiful; when you realize that you are not beautiful, maybe you are gaining it.

Doesn't it sound a bit "mysterious"?

Presumably you've heard a theorem called the law of self-evident prophecy, which means that when you think the future is what it is, it will come as you think it is.

Mitch Princetin, a trustee of the American Psychological Association and director of the Scientific Society of Clinical Psychology, shared an experiment in which Princestin, while in school, asked his students to wear particularly brightly colored clothes with a large line embroidered with the words, "The most popular person in this school," and walked around campus in this dress. This is something that looks particularly stupid. But interestingly, all the people who put on this dress and walked around, came back and said, "It feels great." Everyone they met was curious about them, especially kind and welcoming. Others came to talk to them and take pictures. Students who have experienced it have said that they have never experienced such a good feeling.

It's not so much that "the most popular person in this school" is for others to see, but rather for yourself. When you identify yourself as a popular person, you treat others in an open and inclusive way, and feedback from others verifies that you are "the most popular person in this school." When your heart is full of happiness, love, passion and happiness, it will be fed back to you through the people and things around you, making you feel good. And vice versa.

Cognitive psychology believes that what you feel is a part of yourself, not much to do with others, and to feel and treat others with a positive mindset, you will be full of happiness.