#Rebellious ##Adolescence ##谈你对青春期教育的理解 #
In adolescent families, the communication between parents and children is an important issue in the current adolescent family.
Some parents say that the child does not say a word to us, and even if he does, it is only limited to superficial communication, and we cannot understand his thoughts.
Many teenagers have this idea: I want to talk to them, but as soon as I open my mouth, I can feel the disgust of others, either nagging or reasoning, which makes me bored and I don't want to talk anymore.
Parents' voices: Sometimes we feel that the confrontation between the child and us is very strong, and we see that the child encounters difficulties, but there is no way to communicate and cannot help the child. Sometimes I think that the child is a rebel of adolescence, and it is enough to endure it after this time. Sometimes I really want to hit my child, I don't say anything, I die in a hurry, and I don't want to come back when I get to school...
In many teenage families, communication impasse persists.
Teenagers' cognition is: sometimes I get angry when I see my parents, when I argue with my parents, right or wrong is not important, what is important is that I must not lose with a fierce momentum.
Very selfish, even if the parents are right, that's what they think, not mine.
Special concern for personal privacy: My parents talked either cross-examined or nagged, and did not respect my privacy.
Emotions are changeable, inner contradictions are constant, don't come to disturb me, direct me, when I encounter difficulties, you will help me in time.
Adolescence is a necessary stage of development in the growth process of children, the interweaving of physical and mental health and psychological changes, bringing out the children's inner pressure and confusion, but also make them urgently need to find answers, in their hearts, what they want most is someone to talk to.
Why parents are not the best objects for teenagers to talk to, and why teenagers are closed to the need for parental communication, is worth thinking about every family.
Never heard of a father trembling with excitement when he receives a notice of detention from his son.
Because ten years ago, there was a quarrel between father and son, the son ran away from home in a rage, the father and son were separated for many years, and now they have finally found it, and the son is his greatest wish.
The wandering children finally return home, undergo baptism and transformation, and in the company of their families, I believe that the children will also have a good life.
For teenagers, parents should first "speak well"
Compared with childhood, adolescent brains, bodies, and psychology are very different. Children are no longer "children" in the eyes of their parents, and their pursuit of equality and respect has reached its peak, but they are extremely impulsive, vulnerable, emotional, and extreme.
Therefore, parents should pay special attention to the tone, tone and attitude of their children when they speak.
Don't be high-profile, speak in a commanding tone, and avoid criticizing and blaming the child without a meal; or although the attitude is gentle, you also like to give advice to the child as a person who comes over, hoping that the child will speak in his own way.
If parents do this, it will most likely stir up their children's emotions and trigger their confrontation. From the initial communication to quarrel, and then deteriorated into anger, you are angry with me, I am angry with you, no one pays attention to anyone, or the child leaves home with anger on his back.
What's more, it is also possible that the tables and chairs, electrical appliances, mobile phones, pots and pans in the home will not escape the disaster of shattering.
If you do not want the atmosphere in the home to be smoky and miasma and quarrel continuously, you can change the previous way of speaking and tone when talking and communicating with your children, and use politeness and humility, with an attitude of consultation, suggestion and request.
Parents give their children the necessary support
In adolescence, the sense of independence and autonomy is very strong, exposing his temper everywhere, and he has the final say, regardless of the restraint.
At the same time, they also feel that they can enter the world independently and constantly expand according to their own ideas. But there is a huge gap between reality and imagination, and when they stand on their own feet and constantly place themselves in society, they are prone to failure, blows, and setbacks.
At that time, they will be as eager to be dependent as they were when they were children. They need a place to lick their wounds, learn from their experiences, and then start again.
The place is always open when he needs to welcome him back. At his lowest point, giving him safety, warmth, support and help can give him the courage and strength to set sail again.
Parents face their children entering puberty, many parents are happy at the same time vaguely worried, panicked, afraid that their children will go astray at such a critical stage.
But it is the tempering that every child must go through when they grow up, no one can stop it, and what parents can do is to accompany their children, guide and educate their children correctly.