Truman: Who are you?
Christopher: I'm the creator who created a popular TV show.
Truman: So who am I?
Christopher: You're the star of that show.
Truman: So everything is fake?
Christopher: You're real, that's why so many people are watching you. Listen to my advice, the outside world is as false as the world I gave you, the same lies, the same fraud...
The above dialogue comes from the movie "Truman's World".
The protagonist of the movie, Truman, has been the protagonist of a large reality show since he was born, and every second of his life has thousands of cameras pointed at him, and everyone around him is an actor, including his best friend, his wife... All weave near-perfect lies in a virtual world.
Source: Truman's World
When Truman is determined to escape from this false world, the show's producer Christopher tries his best to stop it, and the above dialogue occurs.
As the dialogue says, Truman's world is fake, but Truman is real. Each of us is Truman. The world we live in is indeed the same as the world christopher created, without a shortage of lies and fraud.
But just as truman resolutely stepped out of the false world and stepped into the real world at the end of the movie, human beings have never stopped identifying lies and exploring the truth.
Why do people lie?
Nietzsche said, "In order to live, we need to lie." ”
Whether ancient or modern, Chinese or foreign, lies are very common in people's lives. If you feel like you rarely encounter lies, it's probably because most of the time you're still in the dark.
No one wants to be deceived, but we ourselves cannot avoid telling a few lies to others. So, while we rebuke the liar, we cannot stop lying.
Does this lie have to be told?
First of all, there are no people in this world who have never lied.
Modern social life is full of lies, as the famous biologist Robert Trivers put it in his book The Ignorance of the Ignorant: "We are all utter liars." ”
In order to better adapt to society, in order to be deceived or less deceived in complex interpersonal interactions, people have long been struggling to find the essence of lies and effective clues to identify lies.
The protagonist of the TV series "A Thousand Lies" is a lie detector expert, who can tell whether a person is lying from the details of people's faces. Source: "A Thousand Lies"
Second, there is also the need for proper "lies" in life.
Sometimes many of life's lies are not malicious, but are dealt with out of courtesy. White lies told in real life for the sake of others are not uncommon. From the perspective of social interaction, as long as the white lie is moderate, it will be conducive to social interaction and interpersonal harmony.
In the movie "A Beautiful Life", the father is in a concentration camp and deceives his son that this is a "winning tank" competition. Source: "A Beautiful Life"
Suppose you meet a good classmate you haven't seen in years, which of the following sentences might you say?
A: I haven't seen you in many years, but you haven't changed at all.
B: Oh, you're fat, your hair is gray and thinner, and you look a lot older.
If you choose A, the listener may think you are lying, but the listener is often happy to accept the white lie. If you choose B, the listener may never want to see you again, and people don't always want to know the truth.
Mark Twain said, "Everybody is lying, every day, every hour, when awake, when they are asleep." From this, we can see that lying is also the need for people to adapt to life and survival.
Motives for lying
People make up all kinds of lies, most of which appear under the "drive and guidance" of different motives.
There are internal and external causes that affect the motivation of lying, and the biggest internal causes are need and internal drive.
For example, a thief steals something, but says that he did not steal, because something is full of temptations for him, and obtaining something is the inducement to steal.
Triggers can usually be divided into two types: one that drives people to get it, and one that drives people away from it. For example, if people do something wrong and don't want to be punished, they will use lying to escape.
Truman's friend vowed that he would not "deceive" him, but he could only continue to maintain the lie in order to work. Source: Truman's World
It can be seen from this that motivation is composed of needs and inducements. So when someone lies, you can first understand his needs or find its cause, and you can find out the reason by following the vine.
Lying addiction is a liaring habit
There is also a psychological disorder in psychology called "lying".
Lying for no reason is a pathology when it deceives others for no reason, for too long or too often, to the point of causing some harm to those who are seduced by the lie, or even to themselves.
People who are addicted to lying, even when they don't need to lie, still intentionally or habitually or naturally lie, sometimes to slander others, get complacent when they see someone believe a lie, and lying becomes an integral part of life.
Some liars simply use lies to obtain perverted psychological satisfaction, resulting in the actual consequences of bragging and deceiving people, although they are repeatedly exposed.
Pathological lying obsessive-compulsive disorder usually has the following characteristics:
Their lies often last for years, sometimes for life. Some people cling to their fictional experience until the moment before they die.
Unlike paranoia, the lies of liars are sometimes made up on the basis of reality, and this kind of lie that is close to reality sounds like the truth, and the liar often makes up a lot of details and story background.
On a whole level, the story is fake, but the details and footage are real. In a way, it is a bit like the montage technique in the movie, things are real, and some even come from other people's lives, but they are rearranged and processed by the liars in time and space.
They reacted quickly, crackling in a bunch of details, but seemingly not answering questions, vaguely speaking on key questions.
If someone questions their lies, they act shocked, angry, silent, or fight back, sometimes with a fluttering look in their eyes. If someone sees through them, they will automatically move away.
People among them often lack empathy, are indifferent to the feelings of others, and only care about their own face.
They are very good at storytelling, are good actors, know how to grab or divert other people's attention, and are good at manipulating other people's psychology.
Not only do they deceive specific targets, but they also habitually deceive those around them when needed, they have the cognitive ability to know that it is wrong, but it is difficult to suppress the urge to lie.
Whether the lie is worthy of forgiveness
Whether the lie is worth forgiving also depends on whether it has caused harm to others, and the degree of harm, in short, it depends on whether the essence of the lie is altruistic or self-interested.
Perhaps for many people, lies are hard to forgive, but is that really the case?
I remember that many years ago, there was such a problem on the "a blind date reality show":
If a poor man pretends to be a rich man who is in love with you, then you will find out. How would you react? 85% of candidates: resolutely break off relationships, honesty is one of the most important qualities.
But if a rich man pretends to be poor and falls in love with you then you find out. How would you react? 85% of people choose: continue to associate, I love his people, not his money.
Indeed, whether a lie is worth forgiving depends on many conditions.
The same is all lying, but the latter's behavior will be forgiven, while the former is rejected by most people, and even considered to be a quality problem. Because they consider the question of whether they will be forgiven from their own interests, it has nothing to do with honesty, but with lies that are altruistic or self-interested.
In real life, everyone can't avoid lying, but often asks others to be loyal.
Because people will rationalize their behavior, even if they lie, they will think that there is a need to lie, and they are also thinking about the other party. And out of self-protection, the behavior of others will not be as tolerant as it is for themselves, and the psychological anger and other psychological experiences of people deceived by lies will make it impossible for the victims of those who lie to forgive the liars.
Source: Japanese drama "My Husband Is Incompetent at Work"
There are also some people who only lie to the people closest to them, especially the lovers, according to their logic, think that no matter how love will never change, the other party will understand and forgive themselves, so they have been indulging themselves to deceive each other for many years. They don't want to lose themselves, but in the end life makes them lose trust and at the same time lose their marriage.
There are thousands of people who lie in the world, and there are many lies that are told, but the only thing in common is the false words.
The birth of a lie is the result of the liar's deliberate and deliberate thinking. Therefore, how to effectively identify lies has always been a topic of common concern.
There are complex psychological and behavioral mechanisms behind lies, and you can't identify lies by just a few expressions and actions.
The "Psychology of Lying" written by Fu Xiaolan, director of the Department of Psychology of the University of Chinese Academy of Sciences and director of the Institute of Psychology of the Chinese Academy of Sciences, based on the cutting-edge research of cognitive psychology, cognitive neuroscience and computer science, starts from the psychological mechanism of lies, behavioral clues, social and cultural influences, lie recognition training, lie recognition technology and application, and comprehensively sorts out the basic framework and context of lying psychology research.
In the book, the author quotes a phrase he likes very much: "Don't deceive others, because the people you can deceive are the people who believe in you." ”
Learn about neuroscience, behavioral psychology, cognitive science, and more
Familiarize yourself with the mechanisms and principles behind lies
Master the tools of scientific deception
Lying and lying is a never-ending "cat and mouse game"
Anyone can lie
But not everyone is effective at discerning lies
-End-
Edit: Cellur | Review: Yoyo
2022.1.18