The throbbing novel of youth throbbing in the long psychological analysis of the novel: How I became like this

Section 28 Single eyelids and double eyelids

The teacher of the primary examination shouted quite scarily that it was difficult, but it was actually fine. I went to junior high school and was reclassified. I heard that I was assigned to a class, and I was a little disappointed. Elementary school has always been in the second class. I even wanted to secretly change the number of the shift or go directly to the second shift to report. Actually think too much. The new students are mixed, and this second class is no longer the other second class. There are still many students in the class, and most of them are good at studying. It is a pity that Li Gang and Hainan were assigned to other classes. As for the baojian that I don't really want to mention, I haven't even seen the shadow. I don't know if I dropped out or transferred.

The town's secondary and primary schools are not far away, across a road and a small residential area. On the first day of school, students came to the new campus with great joy. It's bigger, with more trees and flowers, less childlike chirping, but full of life.

Soon after arriving at the classroom, the class teacher who was watching everyone made an appearance. This is a middle-aged female teacher with a haircut. Wearing black-rimmed glasses, his face is slightly dull, his lips are thinner, and he does not smile. It's a bit like the rather harsh female instructor in the movie. She introduced herself as Qing. An uncommon and nice surname. She spoke and lectured, and slowly immersed herself in people's brains and hearts like rain and dew. We quickly got into the groove. At the end of the class, she assigned us an essay, which is not limited to the subject matter. I secretly applauded in my heart, and now I can show my skills.

I went home and thought about it and decided to write an essay about me and my companions going to plant trees. The content is fictional. That doesn't get in the way. I set my companion's name as Xiaoqing, because I have always had a fondness for the colors of blue and blue. When I watched martial arts movies before, I also gave myself a lan qingqing chivalrous name. I think it's beautiful. The plot of the composition is set as follows: I went to plant trees with Xiaoqing, and when I was almost finished planting, I wanted to take a small sapling home to plant. Xiao Qing refused and criticized me, saying that this was collective property and could not be privately occupied. I realized my mistake, and we went home happy. This is also the usual routine for students to write essays. The theme is correct, and it has been tried and tested. The essay was quickly written. I calmly closed my homework book. Wait for the teacher to praise tomorrow.

The next morning, as soon as the class started, Teacher Qing began to collect her homework. I suddenly felt that the end of the essay I wrote yesterday was not satisfactory, and now I thought of a more meaningful sentence to conclude. So I opened the text and grabbed the sentence and wrote it up. Just after making up, Teacher Qing came to me. She stared at me with stern eyes and snapped, "Didn't finish your homework?" "I know she misunderstood. I don't know how to explain it. Then she grabbed my composition and flipped it over. I carefully glanced up and saw her face soften. My composition should be superior in both writing and content. In particular, the frequent appearance of Xiaoqing's title is more cordial. She smiled and continued to collect her homework with a "Hmm" sound.

Maybe it was this little episode and this little essay, Teacher Qing paid more attention to me. I am often asked questions in class. My strength is not just composition, grammar, recitation, and analysis. Soon he became an old practitioner: a representative of the language class. Teacher Qing has a solid teaching foundation and a funny language, and after a long time of contact with her, she found that she is a kind and interesting person. We gradually dispelled our uneasiness and adapted to the new campus life.

I built a rabbit nest in my yard and raised two small white rabbits. I feed them vegetables every day, and I have a lot of feelings. Who knew that one morning, I found a trace of blood in front of the rabbit nest, and then looked inside, oh my God, both rabbits were bitten to death. Surely the damn wildcats did it. I was sad and blamed myself for not installing a wooden door for the rabbit nest earlier. I can't imagine the fear of this weak creature in the middle of the night when it faced a terrible intruder. What's even more pitiful is that none of them can make a sound to attract people to rescue. I wrote about it as an essay. The opening chapter is very impactful: Ah, blood! Red blood! At the end, I also lamented that this is really a world of the weak and the strong. After reading aloud in the class, Teacher Qing said that I must have had life experience to write such an essay. It's just that the conclusion of the law of the jungle is a bit pessimistic. Some students muttered below: The real world is the weak and the strong. Some students also proposed that even if this did not actually happen, it was possible to write such an essay based on imagination alone. I agree with this view, so I avoid talking about whether this is true or not. Teacher Qing encouraged everyone to express their opinions and did not say much. Actually, she was right. I vaguely felt a little sorry for her.

Spring afternoon. We made a blackboard newspaper on a wall set aside at the entrance of the school. Long Zhen was in charge of painting, and the beautiful vines and branches had been painted. But I didn't find good material for a while. Chun Lin suggested that he should not take a small poem I had written as the theme. I was embarrassed and a bit pushy. At this time, the purple dragon with a knife-like eyebrow and a slight squint used the radical method on the side, saying that if you did not agree, it meant that you were not pure. I understood what he meant, at that time, some classmates copied the selected essays to cope with homework, and almost got praise. The Purple Dragon encouraged me to publish my poems, not to appreciate me more, but to think that after publishing them to the public, if I copied them, someone was bound to report them. His trick is enough to damage. But don't I know my own work yet? So I said yes. This little poem, "The First Time," was neatly copied on the school's blackboard and signed my name for the first time.

The poem is written like this: When the morning dew moisturizes the flower buds / When the wind strokes the cheeks / The intoxication / Can't compare / The first encounter of the soul / Like a timid little hand / Pulling the heart of the slight...

Past classmates walked back and forth, occasionally stopping to admire, how the poem was, and not to say, this practice of marking the author's name made people feel very novel. After Teacher Qing saw it, he praised it. She predicted that I would become a student in the new Chinese department. I was pretty proud to hear that. She also wrote a poem for me to read aloud in class. I once quietly changed the lei character in my name to lei character. I think this word is beautiful and very good. Buds and stones, of course choose the former. Teacher Qing was inspired by this, and she recited affectionately: Ah, you are a golden bud, sprouting in the arms of green leaves, after the baptism of wind and rain, one day, blooming in the bright sunshine... The students all pricked up their ears enviously and listened. I bowed my head shyly. I have never received such a courtesy. The heart is beautiful.

Teacher Wang, who teaches mathematics, is older, kind-eyed, and has never lost his temper with his classmates. She has a mantra when she lectures, and when she explains the results of a topic, she likes to say that "this is within reach". I muttered below: It's at your fingertips. The teacher was a little embarrassed to hear that. In fact, it makes sense to have it at your fingertips. She also likes to say that so-and-so classmates are not inherently bad. I don't agree, which student is inherently bad? Isn't that the right nonsense? But then I met some people and aftermath, I found that there is indeed no shortage of people who are born bad.

Tianlong's brain is relatively slow to react, and the math is not very good. Sometimes the teacher finishes a certain lesson and calls Tianlong up to ask questions. If Tianlong answered correctly, the teacher said: Even Tianlong understands, everyone should understand. I really don't know if I'm praising him or what he is.

I've done a humiliating thing. Junior high school is a lot of homework, everyone really can't take care of it, and occasionally cheats on unit tests. Once in a biology exam, Teacher Wang sat on it to proctor the exam. I secretly flipped through the book below to copy the answers. Teacher Wang was motionless, unable to see exactly where her gaze behind the lenses was. But for a while he was supposed to be looking at me, but he never spoke. I think I must have disappointed her. I didn't expect a good student like me to do this. If she went back to the class teacher and mentioned this matter, it would be really a big haircut. Since then, I've been full of shame for cheating and never cheat again.

Teacher Wang's family lives in the alley next to the water pipe in the center of the town. She has a son named Wang Lin. At night, the children on this side of the road run to the opposite side of the road to play hide-and-seek with the children on the other side. Before playing, you need to rock the scissors cloth to determine who will catch people. Wang Lin and I held out our small hands, and in the light of the moonlight, the five fingers were like white onions. Usually we all think that our hands are very dark, but at the moment we are proud of our Qianqianyu hands, and we like each other's hands.

I started learning English in junior high school. The English teacher was a thin, high-end lady. I think I'm quite talented in languages and I learn English quickly. The teacher organized us to set up an English activity group. Practice conversation after class. I also taught myself a new word, "hert." I put it into practice and said, "I have been hert." The classmates did not understand, the teacher should understand.

Sports are as usual and so-so. It's just a bit of a physical incongruity. When I was learning radio exercises, I always didn't do well in the second stretching exercise, and the movements were very awkward. It looks like the classic action of a hero in modern Peking Opera with his arms crossed in front of his chest and then extended his forearm to raise the shell gun. But I made it, just mechanically crossed, and I couldn't see the internal rotation. When the rehearsal program walked in unison before, there was also a phenomenon of turning. It makes me feel so embarrassed. The physical education teacher trained me in front of my classmates over and over again, and the more nervous I was, the more prone I was to make mistakes. Classmates looked at haha and laughed. Fortunately, I kept practicing later, and I also made up the recipe, and slowly corrected it.

The physics teacher was a pale, slender, middle-aged man. Because of his gentle personality, some students did not have much respect for him. While standing on the stage lecturing, a mischievous student whispered that his pants door was open and he gave a strange laugh. The campus environment is also a bit chaotic. I was in class, and I don't know which guy from outside the school sneaked in and smashed the door of the classroom from outside. A startling bang. The teacher walked over, the man hid behind the door panel, then slowly pulled the door open and waited for a while. The door was wide open, and the man estimated that he had already run away. The teacher then looked out. This move made some girls feel that the teacher was quite weak.

Unlike the physics teacher, the chemistry teacher is a young and energetic young man. The accent is quite distinctive, with a beard and a wisp of curls rising in front of the forehead. When he was in the evening study class, someone slammed the door again. The teacher walked unequivocally to the door, pulled it open, and shouted: Who is it? Who did this to you? Give me out! The mighty momentum frightened the perpetrators into fleeing. Everyone thinks he's much more domineering than the physics teacher. But then again, the physics teacher's approach may be more scientific, if you directly pull open the door and head up, in case the other party throws a stone, kinetic energy plus potential energy, people are hit miserably. It seems that it is worth teaching physics.

　　The chemistry teacher's lover was transferred from his hometown and became our new English teacher. I heard it was his former student. There have also been several teacher-student relationships on campus, although they have caused private discussions, but considering that these single teachers from the mainland are not easy to entrust, they have also acquiesced and blessed.

The English teacher was dressed in a fashionable outfit, with big dark eyes and curly hair in slight waves. Every student has the shadow of a beautiful and stylish English teacher in his heart. She is the One in our hearts. She teaches very seriously. It's just not pronounced very accurately. For example, the word tomorrow tomorrow, she will accidentally pronounce it as hairless flesh. Everyone covered their mouths and giggled. This is easy to remember.

The middle school is a little further from home. I walked along the main road of the town through the elementary school, over a large dirt slope, and then through a residential building. Railroad students all went to school from the east side of the road, and very few passed through the main road on the west side. At dawn, I walked alone on an empty road with my school bag on my back. Occasionally, pedestrians who hurry by are considered strange companions. One morning, the figure of a student jumped into my eyes. It was a tall, thin boy, coming in the opposite direction of me. When he was about to meet it, he turned down the main road and entered the elementary school campus. It turned out to be a primary school student. Look at the size should be in junior high school. He and I met him almost every morning at school. The pinch time is quite accurate. It's just that we don't always seem to be able to meet to a point. Looking at each other from a distance, they went to campus. Over time, it was as if we had reached some kind of tacit agreement. Although there is no conversation, the gaze from the front, even if it is just a few eyes, makes us feel warm and have a sharp heart. His round, dark eyes were as deep and timeless as a pool of water. We are like a pair of wordless strangers and familiar friends. I felt as if I had seen him somewhere. Tracing back to the earliest memories, I was probably walking on the ground when I was babbling and learning to speak, and I only reached the knees of the adults, and then a toddler came across from me, and we looked at each other curiously, and the pair of dark round eyes were too similar to him.

A few times when I was playing a game on the side of the road with my friends, he happened to be passing by. We glanced at each other, then quickly withdrew our gaze and continued our respective activities. His family was supposed to be from the chemical factory, and he was not familiar with local children. One evening, a bonfire was held on the elementary school campus. I slipped through the gate and saw a large circle of people gathered around a pile of campfires on the edge of the playground, dancing and singing hand in hand. I quickly spotted him. Tall, he was conspicuous in the crowd. Against the backdrop of the fire, his face was healthy and rosy. I could see him clearly. But he couldn't see me standing in the shadows.

This day of dark scrutiny flows slowly. Even if I didn't speak, I had more thoughts in my heart and was no longer lonely on the way to school. Until one day, I didn't see the familiar figure again. I looked around dazedly, as if I had lost my soul. I thought he was just having a family affair and couldn't come for the time being. But he was no longer in my sight. I suddenly remembered that I was now in the second year of junior high school, and he should have graduated from elementary school. But if he was in junior high school, why didn't I see him on campus? Could it be a transfer? My heart was pounding. Why are my friends disappearing in such a hurry? Why can't this short meeting time be left for me?

I returned to the rhythm of going to school alone. There is no such thing as the expectation of the past, that heartbeat. Much later, I casually mentioned him to a girl in a chemical factory. She said she knew the boy, named Su Yuan. Good literary name. He took a year off from school at home because of tuberculosis, so he spent a year more in elementary school than his peers. After graduation, I transferred to school elsewhere. I listened in silence, regretting that I had not been able to be friends with him for a long time. I will not forget this boy with a beautiful and slightly pale face, and I wish him all the best.

I'm tall and fast. Soon he was the tallest man in the top few in the class. I'm bothered by it. I wrote in a diary: I was tall. But I don't like to grow too fast. Because people call me "silly big." I'd rather be a little cutie. This is my true voice. Some people are very envious. The neighbor's Guoan was relatively short, and when he saw me, he said, "Oh, how nice it would be to take off your leg and cut it off and give it to me." Funny. Although I am tall, but the nutrition has not kept up, it can be said that the skinny bones, only forty kilograms. Since Channing transferred schools, I was basically the lightest boy in the class. I didn't care, I was white and thin and beautiful. Who wants to look so stupid big black thick.

Liu Qiang is another tall boy in the class. He was taller in elementary school. He was also a little annoyed, walking on the street, others thought he was at work, but he was still a primary school student. Every time he left the school gate, he took off the red scarf around his neck and stuffed it into his pocket. After junior high school, he looked handsome and slightly handsome, and his watery apricot eyes were better than girls. Coupled with his tall head, he has become the object of crush on some girls. Unfortunately, he dropped out of school early. I don't know if he still maintains that innocence and freedom after work.

The people of our place love beauty. Boys sometimes wear a little makeup to class. The most popular is to perm a few rolls on the hair, which looks very foreign. There are simple or homemade scalding tools in the home. Just a small tin or plastic tube with a nylon monkey rope. Roll it into your hair, usually bangs, and after half an hour and then open it, it will naturally form a small roll. The longer the time, the more pronounced the curls become, and the longer they last. My skin was white, and a curly black hair was hanging down slightly, and when I looked in the mirror, I had a hook charm.

What I've always been less satisfied with is my single eyelid. In line with local aesthetic customs, the first element of beauty is to have a pair of large double eyelid eyes. How can this be achieved? I thought hard about it, and first invented the simple and rough big eye exercise. Every day, use your fingers to push the eyelids and corners of your eyes into the big ones. Fantasizing about being able to keep your eyes open. The effect is not obvious for a short time, but there are also unexpected gains. When propped up, it is found that the upper eyelid occasionally has folds, resembling double eyelids. Not surprised by the exception. But such double eyelids disappear after a while. How can it be retained for longer or even permanent? I wanted to swipe my eyelids with a small, slender black hairpin, hoping to make the lines clearer and deeper. Sometimes I also use the needle nose of the sewing needle to scratch the end. Scratching heavily can cause discomfort and even pain. The results are less than ideal. Soon it bounced back. Who thought this conundrum had been overcome by chance.

During the summer vacation, I go to the cinema to see a movie. Accidentally met Wang Lin. When he was in junior high school, he transferred to the city to go to school. Now it may be time to come back and reunite with your family. He was sitting next to me. My heart was pounding. I wanted to talk to him. But the movie just started. I had to shut up. Although I played hide-and-seek with him when I was a child, after all, I had never been in the same class, so it was inevitable that I would talk directly, and I didn't know if he remembered me. Looking at his occasional slight sideways and a little shy look, I should remember. I watched the movie absently, and suddenly worried that my single eyelids and small eyes were not very good,000, would he be disappointed when he looked at me from the side of his face? So I desperately broke my eyes, stared at the screen without blinking, trying to create the image of a big eye, and I didn't care about eye fatigue. I don't know if my efforts have worked. Until the end of the movie, we didn't talk. They went back to their respective homes.

When I got home, I always felt that my eyelids were a little tight and uncomfortable. I took a look in the mirror and looked at it, oh my God, I actually became a double eyelid! The shape is still quite fixed, and it does not disappear because of the blink of an eye. I was ecstatic, and it was a gift from Heaven. I pretended I didn't know what was going on and asked my mother to show it for me. Mom didn't care too much, saying that it might be tired, and it would be fine in a few days. When I got up the next day, I went to look in the mirror, and my eyelids were still there. Thank God. Just a slight sign of downplaying. I couldn't wait and went on to reinforce it with my little clips and sewing needles. After that, this became a compulsory course for me, and I insisted on this kind of cultivation every day. Kung Fu pays off. My double eyelids are basically fixed under this conditioning. The eyes also appear larger. I finally stepped into the ranks of the double eyelid family. If you look closely, it is even three layers, and the layer made plus the original weak layer is one layer more than them.

After the school started, my classmates were surprised to see me. If I knew that I had become double eyelid overnight, I don't know what kind of expression it would be. They thought I had double eyelid surgery in a big city. I simply denied it and didn't tell them the truth. That's my unique skill. I was filled with pride and confidence. Who else would dare to say that I am a small one-eyed person after that. Only Xiao Danping found a hint. Tell me, you see your eyes are red, don't be blind and sneer. Cut, you know what. I secretly said in my heart: If you have a pair of natural big eyes, will you deprive others of the right to love beauty and pursue beauty? It was still a bit flawed in the beginning. Due to the need to flip the eyelids manually or eye movements from time to time, it looks a bit like rolling your eyes. At one point, there was even a nervous disorder in the eyelids. When playing table tennis, some students in the lower grades still look strange: Haha, you roll your eyes again. It's a bit embarrassing. But for the sake of beauty, everything was worth it.

When I went to the second aunt's house in the city, the second aunt and cousin made a fuss and said: If you are good, why do you need to go for double eyelid surgery? Born to be the best. Slightly sarcastic and sarcastic tone. He also said that his mother lied to them that the last time we did not have appendicitis surgery at Sanjian Hospital, but this. I couldn't help but laugh darkly. They're talking about the one I had X-skin surgery on. Embarrassed to tell the truth, my mother told them that I was doing appendicitis. They now mistakenly think we are spending money on beauty. A little overconcerned. They themselves live in big cities, and all four children have double eyelids. Why do children in my small place make them look bad by making a double eyelid? Besides, I didn't do it either, but I didn't bother to reveal my secret to them.

My mother was happy to see this change in me. Everyone said, my child's eyes are not too big, but it is still a heavy eyelid. My appearance has really changed a lot compared to when I was a child. His skin is white and his lips are red, his eyes are starry, and he is tall and tall. Many people have seen me and said: This doll looks really painful (beautiful), is it a second rotor? Earlier, it was rumored that I had exotic ancestry. Who knows?