In marriage, the Cold War is more terrible than ineffective quarrels, and it is easier to destroy the feelings between husband and wife. Many families, because of the long cold war, choose to divorce.
The Cold War was inherently emotional abuse, and the main manifestations common in marriage were coldness, contempt, laissez-faire, alienation and indifference, all of which brought great psychological harm to each other.
When marriage and family lack warmth, only to hurt each other, in fact, it is already in danger. However, how many couples in the world can have a happy marriage without misunderstanding and harm.
Why is the Cold War the deadly poison of marriage, because it will not only reduce the relationship between husband and wife to the freezing point, but also the culprit in inducing divorce! Let's talk about why we stayed away from the Cold War.
First, the Cold War is more terrible than quarrels
Some people say that the relationship between husband and wife is most afraid of quarrels, but they do not know that what is more terrible than quarrels is cold violence. When arguing, you may say something hidden in your heart, you will vent your inner dissatisfaction and grievances, and only when the problem is exposed can you prescribe the right medicine. However, the difference between cold violence is that both people seem to be calm, but their hearts are mixed with a lot of dissatisfaction, which will undoubtedly lead to looking at each other's various unpleasant eyes, and even thinking of leaving to escape such an environment. You don't speak, he doesn't speak, no one can guess the other's thoughts, only the misunderstanding of each other is getting deeper and deeper, maybe the original problem has nothing to do with feelings, but it is because of the Cold War that makes feelings in crisis. The problems accumulate deeper and deeper, and the disappointment becomes greater and greater, which leads to the breakdown of the marriage!
Second, the protracted Cold War was the main culprit in inducing marriage
We say that marriage is either a lose-lose situation or a win-win situation, and if no one is willing to bow their heads for the sake of that only face, then the outcome of the Cold War, whether you win or not, whether he wins or not, in the final analysis, is a loser in marriage. The long cold war then led to the sexual cold war, and if there was no conjugal life, then the contradiction was constantly amplified, and eventually it became a grudge. At this time, the marriage will have a crisis (affair, infidelity, or extramarital affair), which will become indifferent to everything and indicate that the marriage is dying!
Third, it will have a certain impact on the growth of children
We often encounter such things, around us, many families are always arguing, and some have domestic violence. For families without children, there may be nothing, but in families with children, parents often say that the child's psychology will be affected to a certain extent. The child is not good at expressing, will put it in his heart, and may think that his parents quarrel or are cold every day because of their own cause. In this way, for a long time, the child will feel very humble in front of the teacher or classmates, he will choose to completely shut himself off into the world he has set, and he is not willing to have too much communication and intersection with others.
What about the Cold War?
Remember that the Cold War is a taboo in marriage, but also to avoid quarrels and say hurtful words, you can be separated for a short time, calm your emotions, and examine your own reasons. Don't be angry, husband and wife are the bedside quarrels at the end of the bed and, where what overnight feud. Take the initiative to find an opportunity to open up and talk to each other, tell the thoughts in your heart, and it will be much better after you open it. Everyone's personality will be different, some people are just nervous, thinking that the Cold War is to alleviate the deterioration of contradictions, but they do not know that communication is the key to solving the problem! So more often, someone still needs to take the initiative to break this deadlock, not who opens his mouth first, but you know how to maintain feelings!
The feelings of husband and wife cannot withstand consumption, and even deep feelings cannot withstand the cold war again and again. Married life is like a house, the wind and rain will wear out and need to be repaired from time to time.
When there is a cold war in married life, the husband and wife are reluctant to talk, and can use other ways to communicate, such as sending a text message, writing an email, and gradually communicating from the child's learning and life.
When the mood of the husband and wife is stable and the communication returns to normal, they should actively analyze the causes of the Cold War, understand why the problems have not been resolved in time, and learn lessons.
In fact, the reasons for the Cold War in married life are varied, but the most important thing is that when the husband and wife encounter problems, they have not found a suitable solution for each other.
The personalities of both husband and wife are different, and when problems arise, the reaction and solution methods are of course different, which requires learning to discipline each other, and patiently educating and enlightening like children.
Of course, this kind of discipline is not a strict education, nor is it to force the other party to change his personality and cater to himself, but to let both parties understand how to use a way that can be accepted by the other party when encountering problems and solve problems quickly.
At the same time, in love, there is no right or wrong in marriage, and there is no reason to distinguish, but when two people come together, there will inevitably be those small contradictions and misunderstandings. When contradictions and misunderstandings appear, you must resolve and communicate in time, do not hide in your heart alone, even if the other party knows you again, you cannot guess all your inner thoughts and feelings, so when you have doubts, you must quickly raise them. Family is a place full of love, there is no reason to talk about it, many times you can't pull down, you need to take a step back, maybe the feelings between you will be sublimated and become different. Once the misunderstandings and contradictions become bigger and bigger, then it will be difficult to remedy in time in the end, even if you remedy your feelings will always have a layer of estrangement, and you will not be able to return to the way they were before. Therefore, there is no difference between winning and losing between husband and wife, even if they win and have face, but at the last moment they lose their families and their lovers, then it is not worth it and the gain is not worth the loss.
Remember, feelings don't wait for anyone! At the same time as your cold war, you have also invisibly and deeply hurt your original feelings, so please know how to cherish.
(According to the comprehensive editing of the network, if there is any inappropriateness, please correct)