In the Internet age, information is overloaded, and we chase knowledge, eager to know but the easiest to forget. We are busy every day, thinking all the time, worrying that it is like a shadow, endless, so that late at night, we are still brushing our mobile phones, and we can't stop...
Even if we want to lie flat every day, we still can't escape the "inner volume", and we are worried about the uncertain future.
Staying up late, ineffective effort, muddled, physically and mentally exhausted... We become more and more anxious, and life becomes a list that will never be completed.
There is a saying, "If the mind has no habitat, it is wandering everywhere it goes." "What should we do in the face of pervasive anxiety? Until I saw the book "Anxiety is an Elephant", I was suddenly awakened like a Daigo empowerment!
"Anxiety is an Elephant: How to Eat It in One Bite" is the latest masterpiece of psychology science author Zhang Xinyue, written to help modern people face and cope with an increasingly anxious world.
In the book, the author creatively proposes a proven method of managing anxiety and self-healing anxiety through the deliberate practice of writing through the mind, and analyzes the causes of anxiety at the psychological level, and combines the phenomena in life to make us better use wisdom to understand anxiety, accept anxiety, and live with anxiety.
Facing anxiety and eliminating it? Avoid it? Or reconcile with it? Live with it and face it? Or transform it and turn it into motivation?
Don't worry, in the face of anxiety, it's time to press the pause button!
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="18" >01, Why are you anxious? </h1>
I once participated in a Q&A online interview: "If you had the opportunity to go back to 20 and have the appearance, physical strength, and more time you had at that time, and at the same time, your mental state would also return to 20 years old, would you like to go back?" ”
As a result, many people, without exception, choose to go back to the past. Yeah, who doesn't want to be as beautiful as a flower forever, still young? Who wouldn't want to be carefree and do what they love the best at their best age? However, I was reluctant to answer.
All the past is the prologue. Having experienced it before, it is enough. What I have now is also wonderful.
I now have a very satisfactory state, and the setbacks, pains, and anxieties that I have experienced have all honed my mind and made me have the state of self-satisfaction I have today.
I don't want to go back to the silly white and sweet way of the past, to go back to the road of time, to re-experience the struggle and confusion. Since it is all experience, instead of going back to the road, it is better to go the way you are walking now, listen to the true voice of your heart, and do the most correct thing in the moment.
Maybe that's why I'm not too anxious in life. I have a skill, can calmly make choices, can calmly face life, can also collect bits and pieces of happiness in trivial days, calm and calm in my heart, not afraid of the future, not thinking about the past.
To grow is to see oneself clearly and become stronger and stronger inside. In the group, you can firmly define your own boundaries and not be led by the anxiety of a group of people.
Author Zhang Xinyue said: "The mature self is the stabilizer of anxiety, and the stable self-feeling is the immunity against anxiety. Now, ask yourself, "Why am I anxious?"
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="84" >02, what should we do in the face of anxiety? </h1>
Do you also want to try to jump out of the "boiled frog" state, but don't know what to do?
Do you make a lot of to-do lists every day and find yourself not completing them at all?
Are you confused about the more you try harder, the more confused you are, the more you can't see the future, where the road is, and you don't want to pretend to work hard anymore...
Confusion is the origin of anxiety and the uncertainty of the self. Many times, the lack of certainty is because we can't see our own strength, are not confident enough, and can't discover and appreciate our strengths. Because of this, even if we do more things, even if we try very hard, we will still feel powerless, useless, not so good...
So, what to do?
1. Condense yourself in fragmentation, and practice deliberately write independently. Many people dare not write because they are afraid to start, and always want to have a perfect beginning and then write, in fact, what hinders our progress is not the distant mountains, but the small sand grains under our feet. In fact, you don't have to rack your brains to plan what to write, and starting to pick up a pen is the most important thing.
Insisting on writing will unconsciously undergo magical changes, and you will find that you have something to say, write a quieter heart, a better mood, a higher quality of sleep, more smiles, and more harmonious interpersonal relationships with others.
Self-writing is for our inner growth, we can achieve self-cohesion in writing, and harvest a better self.
2. Cultivate the ambition to control desires. With the appearance of the desire to have a good body, with a big house and want a better car, it is these endless desires that are difficult to fill, which has led to more and more anxiety in modern people. As much desire as you have, there is as much anxiety as you want. Let the mind rise above desire and learn to write on its own.
Writing is a process of constantly sharpening ourselves, we sharpen our hearts in writing, practice the ambition to control desires, the original intention of writing is the growth of the self and the integration of the inside, in writing, do not forget the original intention, to always, better to live!
3. Accept your true self. It is undeniable that the Internet age is promoting a narcissistic culture, the powerful function of beauty instantly becomes white and thin, cosmetics can be perfectly concealed, skinny leg artifacts can perfectly cover meat, "you have to understand your own beauty", "you deserve the best", "everyone is a unique existence"...
Under these seductive psychological hints, people unconsciously begin to inflate themselves, and social media is scrambling to create a "narcissistic" race. The convenience brought by social progress also makes people feel that they are omnipotent, and even games are promoting a "sense of omnipotence", invincible, invincible, and invincible.
But are these real Selves?
Accept your true self, keep a reverence for life, everything in the world is closely related to you, you can't run the whole distance in loneliness. You have to be brave to do it, to love with your heart, to love yourself and to love others, and all the good will come as expected.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="85" >03, through anxiety, in search of poetry and distant places</h1>
No anxiety, no life, almost everyone is anxious while growing, since anxiety is everywhere, then we have to explore the past and present of this elephant.
All the past is the prologue, and anxiety is also an emotion, and it is only one of the many emotions in our past. We can't do it without anxiety, but we can use wisdom to understand anxiety, accept anxiety, and be friends with anxiety.
Emotions are the psychological processes that we experience every moment in real life, and sorting out our emotions is the most grounded psychological growth.
Zhang Xinyue said: "Your physical feelings hide your entire spiritual world. "Deliberately recording the emotional problems that plague us, and maintaining continuous observation and writing for a period of time, helps us to better feel emotions, calm down inner anxiety, sort out the relationship and move forward courageously, go all out, and self-discipline every day."
Only independent efforts can bring real growth, can bring you the poetry and distance you want.
If you are often depressed, you are living in the past;
If you are often nervous and anxious, you are living in the future;
If you're always calm, you're living in the moment.
"Anxiety is an Elephant" tells us that keeping a paper distance from life can effectively resolve anxiety, from panic to calmly having everything beautiful, you can do it! The original price of 59 · 8 yuan, the new book on the shelves, 50% off the reward, now only sell 29 · 9, click on the following commodity card, you can free mail to home.
Anxiety is an Elephant ¥29.9 Purchase
Since anxiety is an elephant, let's eat it in one bite!
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Oblique Sun Leaf: I have a pen that can soothe the wind and dust! I would like to work with you, in the text of the years of light, in the reading of the heart to grow, thank you for loving to read you passed by here!