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When watching "Thirty Only", I was attracted by the role of Gu Jia, because she was strong, transparent, capable and wise, whether in good times or adversity, she could face difficulties and live out her own color.
However, there are many people around me who don't like Gu Jia very much, and they think it is really not good if they live like this at the age of thirty. The main reason is not because she experienced the betrayal of her marriage, but because of the way she manages her feelings.
They feel that Gu Jia is too strong and demands perfection for everything, but not everyone in this world can have her ability, and some people feel that Gu Jia is always used to sacrifice and pay, creating a stable situation for her husband and children, so that her husband does not know how to cherish.
I confess that these problems may have been the cause of her final misfortune, but we must not deny her as a person.
There is no perfect person in this world, Gu Jia is already a very good woman, no matter when it comes, she has never given up on improving herself, and she can always think about her family.
It's just that she is too good, and she has not met a person who is evenly matched, and in the process of getting along, she is always accustomed to giving and stubbornly wants to give the other party what she thinks is best.
All of this has made her marriage into a strange circle, obviously paid a lot, but the other party always does not cherish, obviously so good, but will still encounter the little third class dog blood incident.
As a woman, I believe that Gu Jia will have a good life in the future, but I also hope that she can love herself a little more, because only in this way can she be happier.
Well, if you ask me if I would like to live like Gu Jia at the age of thirty, my answer is yes, because the world is changing too fast, no one knows what will happen tomorrow, and no one knows what tribulations they will encounter.
In such a situation, only by making yourself more excellent and stronger in your heart can you truly control your life, and you can be not alarmed and happy.
Of course, we must also learn from Gu Jia's body such a few lessons, so that we can live better and have a more stable happiness.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="57" > don't overdo it</h1>
At the beginning of "Thirty Only", many men were speaking out, saying that if they could have a wife like Gu Jia, how good it would be, go to the hall and the kitchen, have strong ability and beauty, help her husband build a company and then retire to the second line to take care of the family, it is perfect.
Looking at such remarks, I do feel a little sad for Gu Jia, such excessive efforts are indeed liked by men, but they will not be cherished by men.
People's inferiority is to cherish what is not obtained, and not to cherish those that are too easy to get, Gu Jia pays everything for Xu Huanshan, when a qualified Xiannei helps, Xu Huanshan feels that everything is deserved, and even criticizes Gu Jia to manage too much.
It wasn't until xu Huanshan was finally imprisoned that he understood what Gu Jia had been trying for, and how necessary Gu Jia's worries were, but it was already too late.
In addition to her husband, Gu Jia is fully devoted to her children and this family, in order to be able to let her son go to a good school, she would rather go to Mrs. Rich's shoes, in order to be able to keep her family's company, she would rather go to a "Hongmen Feast", in order to be able to pull more business for her family's business, she would rather go to the rich wife's circle to do what she does not want to do.
All this seems to her to be willing, but in the eyes of others, it is really a bit too much, because paying too much will not necessarily have a return, and even have a counterproductive effect, any relationship, a relationship actually needs space, and husbands and children also need to grow on their own, as wives and mothers should learn to let go and withdraw decently.
Later, Gu Jia understood this truth and began to do her own business well, but at this time she was already scarred. Therefore, all women should learn from Gu Jia's body, understand how much we should pay in marriage and feelings, and grasp this degree well, you will be happier.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="65" > no perfectionism</h1>
Gu Jia is a very perfect woman, manifesting in all aspects. She demands that she be perfect at all times, to work out every day, to learn various skills, she requires her family and children to be perfect, to dress up her husband every day, and to have her children go to the best kindergarten.
All of this is a manifestation of happiness in the eyes of outsiders, but for the parties involved, it may be a disaster.
Xu Huanshan said that Gu Jia's requirements for himself were too high and he managed too much, Xu Ziyan was not so happy because he went to a good school, and he was bullied, and Gu Jia himself was also injured in such a process.
Of course, we can't use an occasional result to deny everything Gu Jia has had, no matter what kind of woman may encounter bad feelings, what I want to say here is just hope that everyone does not have so high requirements for themselves and the people around them, sometimes perfectionism is really not very good.
Life is too long, no one can do everything you want to do, if you expect too much, you will only be disappointed, especially when you want the people around you to be perfect with you, it is easier to be hit and hurt.
I have a lot of women around me, they hope that their husbands can work harder, they hope that their children can be excellent and excellent, but the end is that their requirements are getting higher and higher, no one can achieve it, and everyone is very miserable.
I didn't understand this truth before, but after experiencing more and more, I finally found that learning to let go will really be happy, and getting by and living may be the essence of happiness.
Of course, I am not asking you to give up on yourself, let alone let you have no requirements for life and marriage, but I hope that you can be realistic, not that your circle should not be strong, not that your life should not be envied, contented, cherished, and let yourself be a little more relaxed, a little more happy.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="74" > don't aggrieved yourself</h1>
After watching "Thirty Only", I often felt wronged for Gu Jia, because it was indeed a sad thing for her to meet a woman like Xu Huanshan, who had no ability to take responsibility, but had a poor character.
Especially to see her go to socialize and be oiled for the sake of Xu Huanshan's angry customers, to see her put down her self-esteem and pride in order to make her family's business better to please the rich wives, to see her coax Xu Huanshan again and again but not to be cherished, to see her say that after she gave birth to a child, she will no longer be Gu Jia, I am really sad.
In my opinion, women should not live like this, no matter how much you love your husband and children, you should not let yourself be wronged. This grievance is not what others see as no money or anything, but the feeling in the heart.
Gu Jia is depressed in this marriage, because she needs to deal with many things, take care of her husband's emotions, hide her ability, and take care of everything outside the home.
But even if you do this, you still haven't been able to protect the person you want to love, and only those who have experienced this feeling will understand.
Gu Jia is not without fault for such a result, although she is gorgeously dressed and exercises every day, she really does not love herself enough. Obviously capable of working hard for the career, but for the husband and children to be a full-time wife, obviously have a good idea, but because of the "ideal" of taking care of the husband and be careful.
If she hadn't done this and let Xu Huanshan plant his head earlier, it might not have ended like this, but there is no if in this world.
I hope that all women can learn the lessons and understand that no matter when it comes, they must first love themselves a little more, be selfish, let him do what a man should do, let him live a life that the child should live, don't worry about them getting hurt, let them grow.
And for yourself, do a good job in your own small business, live your own small life, leave a little time every day to precipitate and improve yourself, so that you can get inner peace, and you can also have time to heal yourself.
I believe that women who do this will not lose themselves, and I also believe that women who do this will be happier.
The TV series "Thirty Only" has sounded the alarm bell for many women and let us understand how we should live.
I like Gu Jia, no matter what her shortcomings are, but I will also learn these lessons in my future life and strive to live a woman with a strong heart, strong ability and happiness.
May you do the same.
I am Xi Yan, columnist, older girl who is not old and not old, likes to write warm words, do emotional programs, has published "The Rest of Your Life, Related to Me", if you have a story, remember to come to me.