If a gay person wants to come out with his parents and does not want them to be too excited, it is necessary to lay the groundwork, at this time watching a gay film together is a good choice.
Like "Spring Break", "Adele's Life" is too large to look at with friends, it is not suitable for family fun; like "Brokeback Mountain", "Boy Don't Cry", such a careful choice, the protagonist's tragic situation is completely in line with your parents' worries about your future life; the most like "Wedding Feast", "Face" and other family ethics films, there are views and laughter, suitable for knocking on the side, in a relaxed and paralyzed atmosphere, let parents understand the life of comrades, expose your true thoughts to them, and pass on the confidence that you can live a wonderful life.
If they want to reinvent you immediately after watching it, they may wish to play "God Bless Bobby" again. Released in the United States in 2009, the film tells the story of a mother who cannot accept that her son is gay, causing her son to commit suicide, after which she is devastated and joins the gay public welfare affirmative action movement.
In the film, the psychiatrist said that homosexuals have a strong mother and an indifferent father. However, Bobby's parents are loving, his brothers and sisters get along well, his grandmother is still a scribbler, and family life is as happy as a propaganda pictorial, except that his mother is a devout believer.
Shocked to learn that Bobby is gay, her mother is convinced that homosexuals will go to hell in the Bible so that the family can no longer be together in the next life, so she uses the whole family to correct Bobby.
She dragged her husband and son to 60 yuan / hour of psychological counseling, introduced him to the object, instilled the idea of homosexuality and guilt every day whenever she had time, in the corner of the room, pasted with small notes of exhortation, the mother began to nag him to dress gay gay, so that she could not lift her head.
What made Bobby even more unbearable was the "you are guilty" look in his mother's eyes when she looked at him. He decided not to go to college, went to his cousin's house in Portland for a while, and got to know David.
Under the influence of the atmosphere of enlightened freedom, Bobby returned home to have a showdown with his mother, which ended in another quarrel. Lonely and helpless, Bobby wandered the streets and jumped off the viaduct, ending his young life. Before dying, countless unforgettable pictures flashed in his mind, and finally froze in his mother's words: "I don't want a gay son!" ”
As the saying goes, good boys go to heaven and bad boys go in all directions. Bobby is a good boy, he is shy and kind, he has tried to make girlfriends, but he resists physical contact with them, and when he drives past gay nightclubs, he finally understands what he is longing for in his heart.
But Bobby did not go far, at the age of the most self-inflicted suffering, all the restlessness, anger, confusion and self-doubt, all turned into insoluble pressure, step by step to force him into a corner, suffocating him, his wings were not full enough to resist his mother and the religious (correct) ideas that had supported him for thousands of years, only his cousin and David supported him, and this strength was not enough to help him out of the predicament.
In "God Bless Bobby", the mother thinks that she is doing her best to be good for her son, but in fact, she is selfish. She first saw Bobby as a member of the family, not as an individual. In the mother's heart, the family is neat and tidy, the beautiful imagination of decency is deeply rooted, and seeing Bobby like a side leaf on the lawn, she instinctively wants to trim it perfectly. She used the Bible to explain life, not that the world is supposed to be, but the dogma she holds.
Stetson said in "Me and the Temple of Earth": "The misfortune of the son must always be doubled by the mother." When Bobby was alive, his mother was full of anxiety and pain, and after Bobby left, his mother's world was still full of his shadow. She asked herself, am I wrong? She went to the gay lectures he had heard, to gay mom parties, to read books, to find even the slightest solace in everything that had to do with Bobby, or she would go crazy.
Confucius said, "Sleepy and learning", the change of man seems to be a moment, but in fact, he has accumulated an epiphany after accumulating many confusions.
The mother asked the priest: The Bible says homosexuality is sinful, do you agree? Priest: The book also says that children who commit adultery and disobedience to their parents should be put to death. The Bible was written by mortals, and those interpretations reflected the thinking and ideas of that era. Mother: So what do you say about same-sex love to people who come here, thinking that God will approve of their actions? Priest: I told them my belief that God would love their nature.
The first half of the film is about Bobby, the second half is about the mother, at first the mother thinks That Bobby needs God to redeem, and finally she finds herself redeemed. She figured out the causes and consequences, came to church late at night and cried bitterly: "I know why God did not cure Babi, because Babi is not sick, I was wrong, I killed my son."
The climax of the film is at the Walnut Creek Municipal Convention, where the setting of "Comrades Day" is put on the agenda, provoking a protest from the conservative people, when Bobby's mother stands up and faces the live camera and tells her own journey.
"God Bless Bobby" is adapted from real events, the archetypal character Mary Griffiths enthusiastically participated in the human rights public welfare cause after the loss of her beloved son, solved the emotional problems of gay teenagers, and was awarded the "National Medal of Honor" by the US Congress in 1995, which can also be regarded as a complete merit.
The film is set around 1982, just 13 years after the "Stonewall Incident", nearly 40 years ago, but such family tragedies have been common until now, from a piece of understanding and tolerance on the Internet to tolerance and acceptance in real life, there is a long way to go.