Sweden's national treasure modern film "Godfather" Bergmann's classic work "Marriage Situation", after being interpreted by "GulouXi Drama", will be staged at the China Grand Theatre from tomorrow (October 27) to 30.
The work directly refers to the "intimate relationship" in marriage, and makes the audience think about "why marriage is so difficult" by showing the "situation" of the couple's daily life of the couple in the play, John and Marianne.
Before the performance, Shen Yifei, associate professor of the Department of Sociology of Fudan University, linked up with the Drum Tower West drama "Marriage Situation", and used the lecture method to work with the audience to solve the satisfaction code of "intimate relationship" with a more macroscopic perspective and method.
<h2>It is possible not to marry, but not without "intimacy"</h2>
For modern people, marriage is not a necessity for survival, and some people even claim to be "single for a while, and it has always been cool to be single." So, do we still need "intimacy"?
In this regard, Shen Yifei believes that even if the times have developed so far, although marriage is not necessary, "intimate relationship" is still necessary.
Why build intimate relationships, we push back 50 years, you will find that such a problem does not exist, in agricultural society you have to survive, you must rely on groups, not to marry is not feasible.
Marriage today is not necessary, but research in our society has found that intimacy is still important, not unimportant, today.
There is a "happiness inflection point" in economics, saying that after a country's per capita GDP reaches $8,000, people's happiness will no longer increase proportionally with the growth of the economy. By extension, after this inflection point, people are no longer only satisfied with the satisfaction brought about by material life, but will pursue some psychological and spiritual satisfaction.
"When people constantly ask about the meaning of their existence, 'intimacy' often gives the answer. Your connection to others will increase your sense of well-being. Therefore, you will find that although there are many young people who say 'no marriage and no fertility to ensure peace', but the cp is very happy. They can not be in love themselves, but the CP of the bump has to be together, which is the expression of the inner desire for intimacy. ”
<h2>"Intimacy" becomes difficult because we become more rational</h2>
Despite the importance of "intimacy," it seems increasingly difficult to build an intimate relationship in today's life. This is due to Shen Yifei's view because the contemporary society has less and less "tolerance" for sensibility.
Intimate relationships also have a big feature, such as taking love as an example, the occurrence of this relationship is not something you can control with reason. And you like a person, not to rationally judge what "conditions" the other party has, but you feel good with him inexplicably, so love is a kind of emotional force.
Today, our society is able to tolerate "sensibility" in terms of logic that is becoming less and less, not more.
In the past, when we faced the natural world, we felt that we could only seek all kinds of heaven (gods), because we did not know nature and felt uncontrollable, so we were particularly happy when we mastered reason.
Especially in the contemporary era, this logic is more clearly presented, and the so-called development of modernization has two characteristics, the first of which is called "rational enlightenment".
People are becoming more and more rational, and today you will find that rationality is increasingly replaced by commercialized logic.
A "rational" person, he knows why he wants to do this thing, what the cost is, but in the process of human existence, when you completely pursue the rational logical system, the first point we just talked about, "your meaning" has a problem.
The "meaning" I am talking about cannot be completely measured by reason, and there are many values in human feelings that cannot be measured by reason.
For example, when a mother saves her child, she will not first think about whether she is dangerous or not to do so, and whether she will succeed. And this kind of "fighting for ourselves" is often the most touching to us, and it is often the "meaning" we ask. Stories such as "Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai", "Romeo and Juliet", and "Titanic" have become classics because of this.
<h2>"Marriage Situation" allows us to look directly at life itself</h2>
It is not easy to understand its importance and establish and maintain an intimate relationship, so Shen Yifei also suggested that you take a look at "Marriage Situation", because this work confronts many contemporary people's emotional problems that are concerned and confused.
"The Marriage Situation is so real that it makes us look directly at life itself."
Shen Yifei, for example, for some partners, the qualities that attract them the most at the beginning often become the shortcomings that they hate the most. In The Marriage Situation, the protagonists John and Marianne are the same. John recalls the two of them when he was young, when Marianne was full of fantasies, "ghostly, bad temper", but now he thinks she is "unreasonable"; for Marianne, the young John is naughty and eclectic, and will "take pleasure in making her parents angry", but now she thinks he is "stupid, arrogant, clumsy" and "an idiot".
"Why love is so hard, because you are looking for love with two completely opposite logical systems. At first, I liked his 'second return', but together I hated him for not being self-motivated. ”
Shen Yifei believes that in love marriage, romantic passion is often difficult to stabilize and last, and it is difficult for sensibility and rational needs to match each other.
"The world is becoming more and more rational, and the world attaches all the imagination of emotional life to love and marriage, but in fact marriage and love cannot bear such a heavy meaning."
Therefore, Shen Yifei believes that "marriage can give happiness for half an hour a day is already very successful." ”
Source: Thoughtful