https://www.toutiao.com/i6657356868454711822/
Text | Zhang Ruoshui, Figure | Visual China
(i)
"Let's get a divorce." The husband, whom he had not seen in sixteen years, said so.
Yao Huimei put down the chopsticks in her hand, looked at the man in front of her, who was also much older, and readily agreed with the result she had been waiting for for sixteen years. She didn't ask anything, she didn't want to know he needed another woman, she didn't want to know how good he was to her, at least, didn't want to know that from his mouth. From then on, Twilight no longer called him "my husband", he lost his name and became "this man" or "that man" in Twilight's mouth.
Yao And the man met in the summer of 1980. That day, she and her sister, dressed in the same pink dress, came out of the Peace Cinema and came across a man in a suit who asked them if they wanted a small gift and took them to the Peace Hotel in front of them. Yao Huimei thought that in public, people should not deceive them, so she and her sister followed.
The man in the suit told them to wait outside, and he entered the revolving door himself, and after a while, a black man came out, waving from a distance to call the two of them over. Twilight and her sister walked away in fright, and the black man followed and said a few words to them, and they didn't understand what he was saying, they just wanted to get rid of him quickly, but the black man squeezed among them and separated her from her sister.
"Anon hurry up and don't let it go!" Twilight yelled at the pedestrian behind them, the two boys they had been following when they came out of the cinema.
The two boys ran up and walked alongside them, and the black man left with interest. At first, the four of them walked in a row, and then they became a man and a woman walking in two rows. During the conversation, Twilight learns that the boy who walks alongside her is five years younger than her and works as a manager at the City God Temple. She told him she worked in a garment factory. The boy insisted on sending her home, but she refused. When there was still a street away from home, Twilight stopped and said that it would be enough to send it here. Before parting, the boy asked if she could make a set of clothes for him. In order to send him away, Twilight agreed. The boy was overjoyed and said to be waiting for her at Hongkou Park at two o'clock in the afternoon a week later.
Twilight made a set of youth clothes for the boy, which was a thank you for his break. At that time, the streets were no longer full of youth clothes. She waited at the gate of Hongkou Park for half an hour, did not see the boy who came to the appointment, and when she was about to leave, the boy ran to her sweating, it turned out that one of them was at the main entrance and the other was at the west gate.
Fate, what a wonderful thing. If she waited a few few minutes less, if he ran a little slower, they missed each other. Before meeting him, Twilight had a favorite object that was introduced by someone else. To this end, she drove to Jinhua to meet her blind date. When they arrived at the house, the blind date was too busy, and called his brother to meet her. After returning to Shanghai, she wrote to her blind date's parents, telling them that she had a crush on his brother. This letter, the stone sinks into the sea.
In 1975, after Twilight returned to Shanghai from a farm in Heilongjiang, she began to teach herself how to make clothes. In 1979, a large number of young people who went to the mountains and the countryside returned, and Twilight also got her hukou back. At that time, the factory was hiring, and she was admitted to a garment factory. When making pants in the workshop, because of the assembly line work, she was the last, she was not willing to wait, and often took the work of the people in front of her to do. Later, the people in the workshop didn't bother to do it, so she did it alone. A week later, the director of the factory came over with a record book and asked which one was Yao Huimei, and the people in the workshop were pointing at her. The director looked at the clothes on her body and asked if she had made them herself, and Twilight "Hmmm" a sound. At that time, people were very simple, wearing fat clothes, but Twilight liked to wear tight clothes, so she made her own clothes. In this way, Twilight entered the technical group of the new garment factory and went to training classes every night to learn techniques such as cutting and typography.
At that time, people often introduced objects to Twilight, but she didn't like those who were much older than her, and she hated each other's ugly looks, and her colleagues said that her vision was old. In this way, when she reached the age of 30, she met this man who was five years younger than her, who looked good, had a good job, and was good for her and her family.
Twilight's mother liked him too. Because his mother is from Suzhou, he often sends hairy crabs to the Twilight Family. Once, Twilight's mother said that the wooden basin at home was too heavy, and asked him to help get a lighter wooden basin. The next day, he rode his bicycle and brought several wooden basins, large and small. Since then, Twilight's mother has asked him to make a drying rack at home, and a pergola at the door has also asked Yi lai.
Every night after class, he would pick her up and take her home. When talking about friends, he pays his salary on the 15th of every month, and no matter how late the time is, he will send the salary to Twilight for safekeeping, even if it is extra money earned, he will give it all to her. Every sum of money he gave her, when he gave it, Twilight would write it down in the workbook she had brought back from the factory. She thought that the family was the little brother, she was the eldest sister, what she wanted to do with the other person's money, even if she did not get along with him in the future, she would return it to her. But she will not let herself suffer losses, and the money they go out to watch movies and eat together will come out of the money he gives, of course, every expense, she will also keep an account.
(ii)
"Yao Huimei, someone is looking for it!" The workshop director shouted.
The person who found Twilight was the first boy she liked. When they were on the Heilongjiang farm, they were very good.
In 1966, a large poster was posted on the doorstep of Her house because her father, an engineer at the Shanghai Textile Machinery Factory, was badly formed, and they said that he oppressed the workers. Twilight still remembers holding a bunch of materials written by her father, running one by one, saying "My father did not oppress the workers" and asking them to sign the materials written by her father.
Twilight's class of 1967 is almost gone, and only stubborn people like her remain in Shanghai. Originally, she wanted to go to Anhui with her classmates to settle down, but her father would not let her go, saying that Anhui was too bitter. She also wanted to go to Yunnan with a few good girls, and her father did not agree, saying that Yunnan was ripe twice a year, and there were snakes, insects, rats, and ants, and they were old and bitter. Her father helped her pick the last, there was really no way, chose the Heilongjiang farm, the reason is that when Japan occupied China, it first occupied the three northeastern provinces, where the railway traffic is developed, which is one; second, there is a salary of 32 yuan per month; third, there is a cook.
On the farm, Twilight haired the only fire of her life. One day, I don't know whose soap was lost, one by one to check it down, and finally people suspected that it was Twilight. Xiao Mao, who had a good relationship with Twilight in the dormitory, told her. After washing up in the evening, she stood on the kang with a hoe, knocking on the hoe, and said, "If any of you doubt me, please stand up and confront me, and I will tell you that it is me or not." "No one spoke. Because she had just finished applying the ointment to the place where the flea had bitten on her body, that look was really scary.
She called Xiao Mao over, "Nong said it, which one?" ”
"I... I didn't talk about Nong, was... It's what people say! Xiao Mao was so frightened that he stuttered.
There were 16 people sleeping on a row of kang, and Twilight asked one by one, but no one said that she doubted her, so she gave up.
On December 5th, Twilight put the money she had just received in her bag and told them that she was going back and that she was homesick. They thought she was talking nonsense and ignored her. She didn't take anything, got dressed, carried a bag, went straight to the highway, and stopped the car with Chairman Mao's portrait seal.
When I got to the train station, I got on the small train to Harbin, and no one on the train checked the ticket. When she arrived in Harbin, she jumped on the train in Shanghai. After a few stops, someone came to check the tickets. The man led her to the conductor's office, who asked her why she hadn't bought a ticket.
"I'm going to buy a ticket—" Twilight pulled out all the money in her bag, $32, and told him that it was her salary for this month's work, and that she had bought him a ticket. The conductor took the money, took a few dollars from it, said it was for her to eat, told her to sit back in her seat, and called her when she arrived at the station.
When she was about to arrive in Suzhou, the conductor returned 32 yuan to her. He said that the train had two doors, and asked her not to go down the platform door, he would help her open another door, from there out to the front of the train station, buy a train ticket to Shanghai, very cheap. Then, she bought a ticket for a dollar and two cents and went to Shanghai.
Fumbling to the house, she knocked on the door and shouted, "Mommy and Daddy, I'm back!" ”
At that time, the lights of Twilight's house were still on, and her sister was writing to her on the windowsill, and when she opened the door and saw Twilight, she was very excited. Then, the brothers and sisters all ran out and said, "Nong can run back, Ala thought he wouldn't see Nong for the rest of his life!" ”
A few days after Twilight escaped from the farm, her father, who had high blood pressure, suddenly suffered a cerebral hemorrhage and left. As soon as my father left, the family's financial resources were cut off. Twilight, who thought she could stay in Shanghai all the time, had to return to Heilongjiang Farm again because of her father's death, after May Day in 1970. Every month, she would send 10 yuan to her home because her mother was waiting for her money to support the family.
Twilight, who returned to the farm again, had her first spring heart sprouting. Five years on the farm, because of him, seem simple and happy.
In 1977, he resumed the college entrance examination and was admitted to the university in Harbin. Shortly after returning to Shanghai, Twilight received a call from him saying that he was coming back for a funeral and that his sister had committed suicide. When Twilight rushed over, he was writing a letter. Seeing that Twilight was coming, he picked up a large wreath next to her and said that he would write her name on it. Twilight refused, and she didn't know why she didn't want to write her name on it. Relatives who came in and out saw them arguing about it and came to persuade her. In a huff, Twilight left. At that moment, the red thread tied to their legs fell apart. Later, thinking of him, Twilight also felt sorry, she felt that her family was strange, and people gave her a watch.
This time, he came to her for the sake of the household registration. After graduating from university, he stayed in Harbin. At that time, the hukou of those who were on the farm could be transferred back, but not those in the city. However, if their fiancée's hukou is in Shanghai, their hukou can be transferred back. Twilight also wanted to help him, but she and the man were about to talk about marriage.
(iii)
When Twilight was 34 years old, she was in the hospital because of high blood pressure in pregnancy, and after the due date of delivery, the child did not move at all. One day in the middle of the night, the amniotic fluid broke. She quickly called the nurse, the nurse said that there was no hurry, waiting for the doctor to come, after the doctor came, said that she could not touch the child's hair and head, and she would arrange a caesarean section immediately, ask where the family was, and need the family to sign the surgical consent form.
"The family has not yet come, sign it myself." Twilight said.
"No, call!"
The nurse helped call the man, but it was too late, and Twilight glanced at the surgical consent form and signed it.
The man who rushed to the hospital was arguing with the nurse outside the operating room.
"What does this consent form say that 'adults and children are not guaranteed'?"
"Your wife signed it herself."
The nurse's words made him slap the nurse. At this time, the door of the operating room was pushed open, and only one sentence was heard: "Your wife is born, she is a son, seven pounds and six two." He quickly apologized to the nurse.
When her son was born, it was winter, and she was so afraid of the cold that she didn't want to feed him. To buy milk powder, you need to report your account, and Twilight's sister helps her son to go to the account, but she has not yet thought of a name, so she asks her sister to report a "high king". When the people at the police station heard it, they said, Oh, next time I'll get a princess match, and didn't give the name. Twilight was lying on the maternity bed thinking of a name, just in time to see a line on the opposite wall - "if you don't fly, you have already, a flight to the sky", it is better to name it "Goofy Fly". Either fly into the sky or don't fly, he loves to fly or not.
In the second year of his marriage, Twilight gave birth to her son, Goofy. She and her family lived in the Shiku gatehouse of the City God Temple. Twilight's small family lives in a 16-square-meter stove, his parents live in a 16-square-foot stove, and his brother lives in the back building, about 9 squares.
Although the place where she lived was smaller, it was the happiest time in Twilight's life. Her job in the factory was good, and her husband was so good that she could never find a better man than him. He never let her sweep the floor or wipe things, and he did all the housework. Every Sunday, she took her son back to her mother's house, and he would call a taxi in advance. Usually, the son is cared for by his mother and sister. Every day she came back from work, and her mother-in-law cooked a meal waiting for her.
If she had to say that she was dissatisfied with him, what Twilight could think of was that he was too busy at work to socialize too much, and he didn't care about his children. On Sundays, she wanted to take her children to the zoo to see what tigers and elephants looked like. One day, she told him to go to the Western Suburbs Park tomorrow. The next day, he called a car early to wait at the door, and he told her that he was not going, that he had contacted her sister, who would accompany them to the park. Then, he turned his head and instructed the driver to take them to the western suburban park, and at half past four, he would pick them up at the entrance of the park. After paying the fare, he left.
Sometimes, Twilight also loses her temper because he doesn't care about the child, and carries the child back to her mother's house. Her mother never let her spend the night at her mother's house, telling her to hurry back, saying that he would come later. As soon as the child was placed on the bed, the car horn sounded outside the window.
(iv)
April 16, 1988 – A day Twilight will never forget, she remembers the weather was fine and there were many friends who went to drop him off, including his former colleagues who were doing finance. From the way to the airport to the waiting hall, she held her son in tears, and his son kept wiping her tears with his small hands, and he didn't make a sound. He said goodbye to every friend and family, but without saying "goodbye" to her, he walked into the security team. Suddenly, Twilight ran toward the line with her son in her arms, and if she didn't stop him, she might never see him again after the door.
"You don't want to go—" She grabbed his arm and cried out loudly, "You don't want to go—" He pushed her hand away and said nothing, twilight crying. His sister ran over and took the child in her arms and dragged her out of the line, and she couldn't care less about the crowd of onlookers, but just cried loudly, and in the haze of tears, he walked into the door without looking back. She thought he would come back if he made enough money in Japan.
Some people describe Shanghai in the late 1980s as filled with the idea that if you go to Japan, you can make money. He listened to his sister-in-law's brother, who had returned from a part-time job in Japan, say that the money there was easy to earn. Therefore, he is also bent on going outside to make money. He told Twilight that he wanted to make her and her son's life better and give them a big house. He told his 4-year-old son that he went out to earn money to buy him a motorcycle. He couldn't stop Twilight from going out, just like he wanted to do something, and he couldn't stop her, so she agreed. Twilight exchanged the national bonds for cash and took out all the family's savings, a total of less than 20,000 yuan, and he used the money to go to Japan.
After he left, Twilight came home from work every day and felt that everything in the house had changed, and she couldn't see him anymore. She pulled out all his pictures and pasted them on the coffee table, on the cabinet door, under the table, and pasted them all over the room. Every night, looking at her sleeping son, she cried until dawn. Twilight felt that the tears of her life had dried up at this time.
Soon after, she couldn't stand the fact that the house was full of pictures of him, people who couldn't see him, what was the use of looking at those pictures. She took all the pictures, as well as the wedding photos on the wall, one by one, wrapped them up, and hid them under the bed. Later, she packed up his stuff as well.
Every time the people at the public telephone office called Twilight to answer the phone, she picked up the handset with joy, and after a while, she put down the handset in frustration. He asked nothing more than —"How are you?", "Is my son okay?", "Have you eaten?", "You pay attention to resting yourself". Sometimes, she also asked her son to listen to the phone, but when he didn't listen, she desperately stuck the handset in his ear.
After a while, Twilight received several letters from him. Supposedly, these letters should not all be delivered to her factory, but the messenger asked her to help hand over several other letters. One letter was for his sister, several for a friend, and one for her. She opened her letter first, and there was nothing to say, "I'm fine in Japan, don't worry," "Raise your son well," and so on. She was a little reluctant and wanted to see the letter he had written to his sister. She took a look at it and almost fainted. In the letter, he said that if Twilight was leaving, he would let her go, let her leave the child behind, and ask his sister to help raise the child. It seemed that he felt that he had left, and she could not hold on. Well, she'll wait for him to come back and see what he does.
However, she could not allow herself to be immersed in the memories of the past, she had to start over, she could no longer live in the stove room where his shadow was all, and she decided to move back to the old nest in Hongkou District, which happened to be empty and unoccupied. Soon, he sent a large sum of money to renovate the house. She took the yen he had sent to the bank to exchange money. A man walking around the bank stopped her and said that if he exchanged with him, the exchange rate was higher than that of the bank. Twilight thought it was pretty good, and the man said that there was one that didn't work, so give her another one. She went to the overseas Chinese store and bought two cashmere sweaters, one for her son's teacher and one for herself. A cashmere sweater costs 180 yuan, and when she pays the money, Twilight realizes that the amount of money is not right. After being cheated, she had to change money, and she went directly to the bank. Later, instead of sending money directly to her, he sent it to his sister, who then handed it to her in renminbi. He sent her twelve thousand a year, a thousand dollars a month. Later, she realized that it was the money he had given her to support her son.
(5)
After moving to Hongkou District, Twilight interacted less with his family, but still took her children to see his grandmother every week. She felt that she should be considerate of her grandmother, after all, people's sons are abroad, and people can't help but let her see their grandchildren.
One day, the aunt who manages the public telephone in the alley calls Twilight to answer the phone, and at first she thinks it is his trans-ocean call, but a woman's voice comes from the other end of the phone. She asked Nong who he was. The woman first said the man's name, and then said that there was a woman in her factory who said every day that my man can do anything in Japan. The woman gave her the address of the factory and asked Twilight to come over at noon, because the woman just happened to be in the middle class today. Twilight told the other party that she was not available and hung up the phone.
She didn't know who the woman who called her was, how she found her phone in the Hongkou district, and she didn't know the woman she was talking about. Twilight remembered that when he had not yet gone to Japan, someone told her that he had a good financial relationship with the City God Temple. At that time, she thought he was the manager and it was normal to have a good relationship with her colleagues. This finance, every New Year's Holiday, also sent her son shoes and clothes, and occasionally sat in her house. At that time, she did not believe in gossip.
On this day, she received another phone call from her son's teacher. The teacher said on the phone that Gao Feifei did not take home the lunch box yesterday, and today's lunch was served in an unwashed lunch box.
When she went to school in the afternoon to pick up her son, Twilight brought two blouses made in the factory.
"Teacher, you will help us wash the lunch box later." She gave the shirt to the teacher. Since then, my son's lunch box has been washed with the help of the teacher. Because the teacher often complained to her, she did not give gifts to the teacher.
Once, after school, Twilight went to school to pick up her son. The teacher asked her if she had never hit her son, and she said yes. The teacher asked her if she never scolded her son, and she said yes.
"When you go back today, you must beat your son, who has been doing small things in class."
"Okay."
Twilight put her son in the back seat of the bicycle and told him that she must hit Yi today, and her son said yes.
When she got home, she instructed her son to go to the room, took off his pants, and lay on the bed, waiting for her to come and beat him. When her son entered the house, she began to cook dinner on the stove.
"Mom, I'm ready, Nong is good to come in and fight!"
"Nong don't worry, wait for your mother to have a good stove, and then come in and beat Nong!"
Busy, she forgot about it. When he entered the house, his son's little ass was lying there, and he took off all the cotton wool pants inside, so that he would be sick, and she told her son to quickly put them on.
After eating and tutoring her son with his homework, she told him that if he kept being like this in the future, his mother would not want him. She told him to finish his school bag and go into the house to sleep, she went to help him make the bed, and with a turn of the, his son was gone. She shouted twice at the door, but no one answered.
Twilight got on her bike and spun around the streets, shouting, "Fly, Nong's back." After riding several roads, I finally saw my son's small back on the edge of a fruit stall. The dim light shone on her son's body, and her heart softened at that moment. She parked her bike in the distance, not daring to call out to him, for fear that he would run again. She walked over slowly and said, "Fly, Allah go back all right." ”
The son turned back and hugged her at once, "Mom, Mom." ”
She asked him why he ran out.
"Nong said he didn't want me, his father didn't want me, and Nong didn't want me anymore..."
(6)
Her son was carrying a school bag to go to school that day, and Twilight told him that she would have a middle school classmate come to see her later. The son immediately stopped and asked if it was a man or a woman, and she replied that it was a male classmate. The son put down his school bag and said that he was not going to school today, "Nong didn't have a male classmate come to my house." ”
Twilight tells her son to go to school with confidence, and she will call her aunt and ask her to accompany her.
"Really, Nong is going to call Auntie."
She said she wouldn't lie to him, and her son picked up his bag and went to school. That time, she really called her aunt to accompany her. Twilight didn't expect her son to be so young and sensitive.
Once Twilight was doing laundry at home, a group of children rushed over, and her son's hand was wrapped in a sheet, and blood was dripping down. It turned out that when he was playing, he accidentally rubbed the glass.
She rode her bike and took her son to the hospital. The doctor stitched up his wound seven or eight times. Returning from the hospital, she went to find her son to tear off the sheets that bandaged the wound, whose family dried them, found them, and paid them to others. When the time came to remove the stitches, she did not have time to take her son to the hospital, so she gave him two stitches. The next day the teacher called and said that Goofy had removed the stitches during class. At first, she was still wondering, and only after the teacher explained did she remember. When she went to pick him up at school, her son told her that it didn't hurt at all and that it was tearing it down all at once. "Nong is brave," she praised him.
On a normal Sunday, Twilight came home from work and collected her clothes at the tiger window. A policeman called her downstairs, saying her son was at the police station. When Twilight heard this, all the clothes in her hands fell off and she rushed to the police station. It turned out that every Sunday, children would climb the wall into a middle school to play ball. On that day, in order to teach them a lesson, the school people sent the children to the police station, and most of the children ran away, except for her son and another child. The child called the grandparents to bring it back, and her son did not know the phone number in her factory, so he stayed until now.
During that time, Twilight was particularly busy in the factory, and sometimes she was needed to travel on business. But she was not at home, the child was left alone, and she had to ask the teacher for leave and take her son on a business trip.
Once on a business trip to Ningbo, my son was also very suspicious in the workshop. When she was about to leave work, she didn't find him, and the whole factory helped to find the child.
"Master Yao, your son is by the river!"
She ran out and called out his name, and he ignored her. The son was sitting on a rock by the river, with a stick in his hand, and was plucking the ducks in the river.
Another time I went to Anhui on business, because when they went there, they wore thin clothes, and their son had a cold and fever. The factory helped make pants for the child and bought him warm shoes. The son refused to wear warm shoes, so angry that she wanted to beat him, which was good, and he circled with her in the workshop.
When they went back by train, they bought soft sleepers. When she was sleeping at night, Twilight turned around, and a man was lying naked on the opposite bed, frightening her to make a noise, and immediately came down to find the police. The police officer came over to check it out and changed them into a bed.
At that time, in addition to sending money back, the man would also send clothes back to his son. Didn't buy a motorcycle for my son, bought him a Giant bike. Within two days, the bike was stolen. However, because the man insured the car, they also received compensation. Later, he bought his son's computer.
(vii)
Twilight went out to buy something, walked back from the Tilan Bridge, and when she passed the Xia Hai Temple, a fortune teller looked at her and asked her if she wanted to tell her fate, and she said it didn't count, because her mother had told her that fate was not easy to calculate. When Twilight lifted her legs to leave, the fortune teller said: Send you a word, you are a free man.
In the blink of an eye, Twilight was 50 years old, and she retired in 2001, with a monthly retirement salary of less than a thousand yuan. The director of the factory said to give her 1300 a month and told her to do it for a few more years. At that time, she also wanted to continue to stay in the factory, thinking about it, she had been bitter enough in these years, so she did not go to work and lived a retired life.
Every day at the end of lunch, Twilight cleans up the house, prepares the ingredients for dinner, and goes to the park to learn ballroom dancing with the teacher. Sometimes, she also went to the dance hall, but she didn't like the atmosphere in the dance hall very much. For example, 51-year-old Twilight can't find a man under 50 to dance, only someone older than her comes to her, but she doesn't want to dance with a 60-year-old. Everyone in the dance hall has a dance partner, and if the other person's dance partner does not come, she can be invited to dance. Once, a man invited her to dance, and halfway through the dance, he threw her down, and it turned out that the dance partner of the family had come, and she thought it was really weird and scary. Another time, a man older than her wanted to dance with her, not with his former dancers. He told her he was taking her out for a special jump. She thought that she had only just learned, and that it was good to go out to dance, and was about to promise someone that another man whispered to her that when she learned to dance with that person, she should give him a pack of cigarettes every day, dance well, and invite him to a meal.
She was very angry, and from then on, she did not go to the dance hall, but instead rubbed mahjong. People who go to the dance hall will dress up and go beautifully. The mahjong room is a place where you can wear slippers and shorts, and when it is hot, men can go shirtless and eat cigarettes. There is a kind of person in Shanghai who eats and eats, he does not work, he takes a cup all day and shakes it around, stands on the side, and watches others play mahjong without moving his body. Twilight finished rubbing a round, he also finished watching, really frustrated.
(viii)
The year the man came back was 2006.
He first went to see his son, and at that time, Gao Feifei worked at the Guxiang Hotel. Hearing his father waiting for him in the café, he rushed to him and sat down across from him. This is all that Goofy told Twilight when he came back from work, and he told his mother that they didn't talk about anything. Twilight thought that when the man saw his son, he would give him a bank card and tell his son that he liked something to buy himself. She thought that she had watched too many TV dramas, and this thirteen-o'clock man, who had not seen his son in sixteen years, did not express anything at all. No wonder after the meeting, the son was not happy.
Two or three days later, he called and asked Twilight to meet at a small restaurant.
Plate after plate, but he did not move his chopsticks. Finally, he spoke and said, "Let's get a divorce."
"Well, I agree."
Twilight wants to raise his son from the age of 5 to 21 by herself, and waits for him to say this. For 16 years, he couldn't have been out there alone, and she was willing to divorce him. She told herself that the time she and he had gone from love to marriage added up to 8 years, compared to the 16 years he had been with the woman, and she let him go. Twilight also told her son this when she returned, and her son didn't say anything.
Then, she went to consult legal counsel, whether it was better to divorce by legal means or by agreement. The legal counsel advised her to agree on a divorce, saying: "If you're going to sue him, you've been out of 16 years together. People like them who come back are rogues and hooligans, he can say that he doesn't have any money, he says he eats people's homes there, he has no money! Even if he investigates his property, it will not be found, and he can transfer the property to the other party's account. ”
A few days later, the man came to her again, and he approved of their divorce agreement, saying that there was no property entanglement between them and that the son was an adult and did not need to fight for custody.
"When your son grows up, you don't have a house to marry, you have to prepare him, and you have money to get married, that's it." Twilight says that as for herself, she doesn't need any mental damage fees.
He said yes, there will be, and the house on Hongmei Road will be his son's. The house on Hongmei Road was actually the house that the woman's mother's house in Zhongshan Park was demolished, and after the woman's mother died, they lived there as soon as they came back. But he lied to her at the time that she was staying in a hotel and was actually returning to China with the woman.
After the divorce at the Civil Affairs Bureau, they went to the opposite bank. He took out a gold card and asked her to transfer money. He said that the account name of the card was not his, but Wenwen's. It turned out that the woman's name was "Wenwen".
Later, Twilight learns that the woman has a daughter the age of her son. Similarly, two children are in school, and their children have been sent to Singapore to study early, but her son does not know what broken school to study in.
After a year of divorce, he bought a three-bedroom, two-bedroom house in Minhang District. He was so assigned, one for them, one for his daughter and one for his son. Twilight is not a domineering person, so she asked her son to live with them and make a good relationship with them. The son also obeyed and went after work. Unexpectedly, my son came back the next day.
Fei Fei said that when he was eating at night, looking at his father, as well as other people's mothers and children, he was thinking that if his parents were with him, it would be good. The next day was Sunday, and the woman, after Feifei got up, told him to take a shower tomorrow and wash off her socks and pants. But Fei Fei knew how to wash clothes, he had never washed this kind of thing. Twilight later reflects that she is spoiling her son too much. But the son has lacked the father's love for so many years, and she wants to give him as much maternal love as possible, so she will not let him do any housework. She felt that everything she had done had been seen by him, and the boat was naturally straight to the bridge, and he would naturally be.
(IX)
Twilight stood at the window, with a divorce certificate in one hand and a hospital summary in the other, and she wanted to jump down, a hundred.
It was early 2008, and Twilight was diagnosed with middle and advanced breast cancer, hydropulmonary hydrops, and a cyst next to the liver. She wanted to jump, the heavens were so unfair to her, she really couldn't get by! She thought of her son, the son who had not yet started a family, and if she left, there would be no one to take care of him. She wants to live, she wants to cure her illness!
Before going to Xinhua Hospital for surgery, she told her son not to come to the hospital to see her.
She lay on the operating table and the doctor asked the family to sign it. She said there were no family members, and I would sign it myself.
The man came to the hospital to see her, gave her ten thousand dollars, and left. His son came to see her and asked her if she was in pain.
"No pain, no painkillers, Nong don't come to see me tomorrow."
Twilight didn't want her son to come to see her, and she thought he wouldn't be able to stand it. But Fei Fei, who works in a restaurant, brings some turtle soup to her from time to time.
After the surgery, she had to undergo six courses of chemotherapy, and her hair fell out. Every time she had chemotherapy, she looked for a time to go through at noon, stayed in the hospital overnight, and started hanging needles at 8 a.m. the next morning until 9 p.m. Then she went home, gritted her teeth, and climbed the stairs.
Twilight went out to buy vegetables, and three or five groups of people in the community surrounded her, pointing and pointing. She knew they were talking about her. She walked over to them and asked, "Do you want to know me?" She thought that since people were talking behind their backs, it would be better to go to the front and let them know the situation, and she told them that she had breast cancer and was now undergoing chemotherapy, so her hair was gone. Later, she bought a wig.
After buying vegetables and going home to cook, she had to wash a dish three times to wash it well. When she first washed, she felt that she could not hold on, so she went back to her room to sleep for a while, felt better, and then got up to wash the dishes. At that time, she only had one idea: to live for her son.
At the end of 2008, she went to the hospital for another surgery, because the cyst next to her liver was the size of a small bowl, and if she didn't open it again, it would be broken. She told the doctor that after opening her abdominal cavity, she would take whatever she saw was not good.
After her body healed, Twilight was still the same as before, dressed up fresh and refreshed every day before going out.
After two years, she joined the Shanghai Cancer Rehabilitation Neighborhood Committee. When she was first introduced at the meeting, she said that everyone is a blessed person, and when she is sick, her husband or children pour a cup of tea to eat, and ask if it is hot, but she has to drink a sip of water to burn it herself. She hoped that everyone would be blessed and cherish their families.
(x)
Fei Fei was a little sick and hung up in the hospital. After Twilight told him, he hurriedly came and handed her a wad of money, saying that Wenwen had asked him to give her 3,000 yuan. Twilight was a little uncomfortable when she heard this, but she unceremoniously took his money and said thank you to Nong.
After coming out of the hospital, FeiFei saw that there were gloves for sale at the stall, and said that he wanted to buy a glove so that it would not be cold when driving an electric car. The man took out 300 yuan to give to his son. Buy gloves and fei fei put the rest of the money in his pocket. Walking to the front of a KFC, Fei Fei said that he was hungry.
The man's pace slowed down, and he asked Twilight if she had brought more money.
Twilight listened to him and thought this man was really stupid, and she was busy saying that it didn't matter, she came to pay. She thought that the 300 yuan should be the woman who told him to invite them to dinner, who knew that the son was going to buy gloves halfway, he thought that he bought gloves, so he would take the car back, who knew that the son said that he wanted to eat KFC. It seemed that his sister was right, before he gave all the money to Twilight, now he gave all the money to the woman, and he didn't want a penny in his own house.
When eating KFC, Twilight pointed out to him, "Nong's own family should hide some money." The man at thirteen o'clock said that every time Wenwen gave him pocket money, he said not to give so much, he couldn't use it. Twilight had to tell him that you still have a son. Twilight really can't understand this man, he returned to China to work on the construction site in Suzhou, where he had to rent a house and eat, and every penny he earned was given to the woman, and the woman's circle of friends was a photo of the world's tourism. She couldn't see it later, so she pulled the woman into the blacklist.
One day, Twilight opens the mailbox and receives a dunning letter from the bank. She asked her son if he owed money.
The son said he didn't have the money to pay back his credit card because his paycheck was stuck with his dad. Twilight knew that before her son asked him to buy him a mobile phone, he agreed. When I bought the phone, the woman also went. After the mobile phone was bought, he went to his son's pay card and said that the cost of buying a mobile phone was deducted from his salary. How can Fei fei live without a salary card, so he has two credit cards. Flying without a concept of money, eating eight uses blindly, thus owed a card debt.
Twilight told him to call his dad—
"Dad, the jianghu is in a hurry. Can you help me pay back my credit card first? I'll pay you back when I have the money. ”
"When something happens to me, what did Nong come to me for?"
Fei Fei probably did not expect that his father would be desperate to this point, and there was no way for Twilight to help his son pay back all the money he owed. Fortunately, since then, my son has not used a credit card.
After this incident, FeiFei stopped talking to his father. A few days later, he told Twilight that he didn't want to go to work.
Fei Fei finished his own list that day, and the foreman saw that he was idle there, so he made someone else's list for him. Fei Fei, who was in a bad mood, really couldn't understand why others could not finish the work why they were sent to him. Then, Twilight went to Feifei's logistics company and found his manager, who said that he had taken good care of Feifei.
Every time her son changed jobs, Twilight would help him build a good relationship. After working for the restaurant he had contacted for a year, he didn't want to do it. Now, he doesn't want to go to work anymore, he doesn't talk to her, he doesn't go out to see friends, he just stays at home. Twilight is afraid that her son will suffer from depression and begins to take him to a psychiatrist.
After returning from the first day of counseling, he still did not speak. The next day, she took him again, and her son said a word - "waste money". Twilight had to ask the psychiatrist, who said that her son did not cooperate and did not speak much twice. Twilight wondered if it was in vain, and she told her son that she would not come in the future. She thought that since her son did not cooperate, it meant that his son was not sick.
(xi)
In 2017, the leader of the neighborhood committee of Twilight's neighborhood came to her, hoping that she could lead the dance team to participate in the competition and win the prize. Because she was not in good health before, she did not go to the dance team very much. Now thanks to the leader's admiration for her, she agreed. Within two days, someone on the dance team began gossiping, saying, "That woman is divorced."
The next day, during a rehearsal break, Twilight asks them if they want to know her story.
They sat in a circle and listened to her standing there telling her story. During this time, she saw someone in tears. At that time, she thought that if she gave birth to a daughter, at least the underwear and shorts she changed out, the daughter would wash them off together, but the son was impossible.
She read an article in which a single mother taught her son that you are a man and that you should protect your mother. But she never said anything like that to her son.
Even though the son's relationship with his father became estranged, she tried to repair their relationship. After all, they are father and son, a fact that can never be changed.
Two days earlier, she had told the man that she had herpes zoster. He didn't say a word and transferred 3,000 yuan to her. She thought that he had finally learned a little better now.
My son would help her apply her medicine on time every day. He counted the number of herpes grains before applying the medicine; he said that if there was more herpes the next day, it would prove that her condition had worsened. Next, he wants to take a picture, because he has to compare colors, and if the color darkens the next day, it means that the condition is getting better.
She said at home it was uncomfortable that it wasn't comfortable, and the sheets were bad again. His son would tell her that when she was well, he would change the sheets for her again.
Her son's care made Twilight very pleased. She didn't want to find another wife, she thought she was "bitten by a snake and afraid of the well rope for ten years." She just wants to follow her son for her life, and if one day her son gets married and sees him happy, she will be happy.
The man now talks to her regularly on the phone, caring about her recent situation, and Twilight asks him how his daughter, who has advanced stomach cancer, is doing. As for his son's house, he said when his son got married and when he had a house.
From now on, the "Mirror Phase" column of The Panker will successively publish some of the competition entries.
The presentation of works does not constitute a finalist.
▍Organizing Committee of the Competition
Organizer: The Paper
Co-sponsored: School of Journalism, Fudan University Today's headlines
Guiding unit: Shanghai Writers Association
Academic Support Units:
College of Media and International Culture, Zhejiang University
School of Journalism and Communication, Wuhan University
School of Journalism and Communication, Nanjing University
School of Communication and Design, Sun Yat-sen University
School of Communication, East China Normal University
School of International Journalism and Communication, Beijing University of Foreign Chinese
Guangming School of Journalism and Communication, China University of Political Science and Law
Shanghai University Faculty of Letters
School of Journalism and Communication, Shaanxi Normal University
School of Communication, Shenzhen University