Wang Zengqi: "Grandma didn't starve to death all at once, she starved to death little by little."

This article was originally titled "Butter Flaky Cake",

Excerpt from "Meat Eaters Don't Despise"

Author: Wang Zengqi

Xiao Sheng followed his father to the outside of his mouth.

Xiao Sheng turned seven and entered the age of eight. He had been following his grandmother all these years. His dad's job had been irregular. One moment to repair the reservoir, the next moment to refine steel. is also tuning back and forth. Grandma was alone in her hometown and said it was very deserted. When he was three years old, he was sent back to his hometown. He ate a lot of turnip cabbage, millet noodle cakes, and corn flour cakes in his hometown, and grew taller.

Grandma didn't care much about him. Grandma is in trouble. She always found some bits and pieces of material to give him clothes, pants, pants, cotton jackets, cotton pants. His clothes were all joined together, one blue, one blue. It was quite clean. Grandma also made him shoes. Dress yourself, cut the pattern, take the bottom, and make your own hair. Grandma always said, "You have teeth on your feet and a mouth?" "Your feet are made of iron!" Then there's the food for him. Millet noodles, corn flour cakes, radish cabbage - scrambled eggs, boiled fish. He plays outside all day. Grandma finished cooking and shouted at the door, "Sheng'er! Come back for dinner——! ”

Later, a canteen was opened. Grandma handed over the two pots in the house and came back from the canteen to eat. That's not bad! White noodle steamed buns, flapjacks, fried tofu with shrimp sauce, stuffy eggplant, pork head! The master of the canteen, dressed in white clothes and wearing a white hat, dangled in the white heat of the steamer, tapping the edge of the pot with a shovel, and shouting loudly. People are fat, pigs are fat. That's not bad!

Then it didn't work. Or millet pasta, cornmeal.

Later, there was bran in the millet flour cake, and the corn flour cake had the ballast ground out of the corn kernel, pulling the throat. People are thinner, and pigs are thinner. In previous years, it was difficult to pick up a pig. As soon as he reached out, he grabbed the pig's hind legs. It was a big Clang, and as soon as I squeezed it, I fell down. The adulterated cake was not delicious, but Xiao Sheng still ate it quite deliciously. He was hungry.

Grandma didn't eat well. She came back from the canteen, broke half a piece of bread, and chewed for half a day. The rest belonged to Xiao Sheng.

Grandma's health turned out to be bad. She had a wheezing sickness. Committed every winter. It was fine during the day and hard at night. Xiao Sheng lay on the pit and listened to his grandmother drink and gasp. I woke up and listened to her drink. He thought, Grandma drank all night. But Grandma still got up and drank and gave him breakfast in the canteen, mixed with fake millet cakes and tortillas.

Dad came back in the winter to see Grandma. He came back every year, in winter. Dad brought back half a sack of potatoes, a bunch of mushrooms, and two bottles of butter. Dad said that he had divided the potatoes; that the mushrooms were picked and dried by himself; that the butter had been made "through the back door." Dad said that butter was made from milk and was very "nutritious" and asked Grandma to eat it with a cake. Potatoes, Grandma borrowed a pot to steam, cooked, put in the stove to roast, for Xiao Sheng to eat. Mushrooms are salted once during the New Year. Butter, Grandma told Dad to take it back: "Eat it." Something so valuable! "Daddy must stay for Grandma." Grandma left the butter behind, but never ate it. Grandma put two bottles of butter on the reclining cabinet and wiped them with a rag from time to time. What is butter? Milk refined? Through the glass, you can see that its color is tender yellow and yellow. Xiao Sanjia gave birth to Xiao Si, and he saw Xiao San give Xiao Si a pine pollen to beat the prickly heat. The color of butter is like pine pollen. Oily and beautiful. Grandma, this is edible. Xiao Sheng didn't want to eat. He hadn't eaten, he wasn't hungry.

Grandma's health is getting worse and worse. She used to get the cake back from the canteen and was able to walk home in one go. No, I'll have to take a break when I get to the crooked willow tree. Grandma kept up with the elderly grandfathers and grandmothers and said, "I'm afraid I'm going to have winter, but I can't get through spring." Xiao Sheng knew that this was not a good word. It's a curse word. "Hiccup! Look at you as boring! Winter is not spring! "Sure enough, spring is not good. The old men and women of the village died one after another. There was a wood production cooperative in the town, and the original furniture and plough rakes were stopped and the coffins were replaced. A number of new graves and white flags were added outside the village. Grandma was gone, she was swollen all over. Press it with your finger, the boss has a pit, and he can't get up for half a day. She begged someone to write a letter to ask her son to come back.

Dad rushed back, and Grandma was already panting.

Dad begged the wood society to change the cabinet in grandma's house into a coffin and bury grandma. At night, I sat on my grandmother's kang and shed tears all night.

For the first time in his life, Xiao Sheng experienced what "death" was. He knew that "death" meant "nothing." He has no grandma anymore. He was lying on a pillow with the smell of Grandma's hair on it. He cried.

Grandma made him two pairs of shoes. Done, say, "Come and try!" "Wait a minute! Squeaky, he ran. Xiao Sheng woke up and tried both pairs of shoes barefoot. One pair of right feet, one pair bigger. His bare feet touched the bottom of the cloth, feeling Grandma's bottom line, and he cried out, "Grandma! He cried again.

Dad visited the elders in the village, packed up the family's things, and put some pots and pans that could be applied in a large net basket. The two pairs of shoes that Grandma made for Xiao Sheng were also packed in the net basket. Two bottles of butter that had not been moved were also packed in the net basket. He locked the door and took Xiao Sheng on the road.

Xiao Sheng was not familiar with his father. He was used to it with his grandmother. He didn't speak at first. He missed home, thought of grandma, thought of the crooked neck willow tree, thought of a pair of big white geese of the little three families, thought of dragonflies, thought of grasshoppers, wanted to hang up the big flat and flew up and flew up, revealing the pink wings of the green hard wings... Later, I became acquainted with my father. He's Daddy!

They took the car, they took the train, and then they took the car again. Dad was nice. Dad always led him to talk and told him many things outside his mouth. His words grew louder and louder, asking this and asking that. He developed a keen interest in "out-of-mouth".

He asked his father what it meant to be "out of the mouth." Dad said that "outside the mouth" is outside Zhangjiakou, also known as "on the dam". "Why is it called Damshang?" He thought the "dam" was a dam. Dad knew it when he said it.

Dare to love the "dam" is a big mountain. The top of the hill is aligned, like a dam. But it's so big! The car climbed up one by one. The car was very tired from climbing, as if it was out of breath, and kept humming. Up the mountain, hey, a big flat! It's really flat! Flat and big. It's like rolling. How can it be so flat! As soon as the car got on the dam, it spread out. It stopped humming, "brush—" all the way ahead. As soon as I got to the dam, the climate suddenly changed. It's summer under the dam, and once you go up the dam it's like autumn. Suddenly, it was cold. On the dam and under the dam, the knife cuts the same. What a peace! Far away there are a few hill packs, round and round. Not a single tree. There are many trees in his hometown. Elm, willow, locust. What a place this is! Don't grow a tree! It was a large flat land, turquoise, overgrown with grass. There is land. This plot is really big. From this little mountain bag to the small mountain bag, it was like a cloth all the way to the small mountain bag. How big is the plot? Dad told him that a farmer had led a cow to the plough, ploughed it, and when he came back, the cow brought back a new calf, which was three years old!

The car arrived at a county town called Guyuan, which was their last stop. A bullock cart came to pick them up. The appearance of this car is really ridiculous, the rudder is two wooden cakes, not very round, bone, bone, rolling forward. He lay on his back on an ox cart with a big blue sky above him. The ox cart was so slow, not as fast as he was. He sometimes came down and pinched two wildflowers, walked a little, and climbed into the car again.

The crops in this place are not the same as in the mouth. There was no sorghum, no old corn, grown quinoa, flax. The wheat was very clean, as if it had been washed and combed with water. Flax with a small blue umbrella, beautiful, not like a crop, but like a flower to watch.

Drink, this big piece of Maran! Maran also has their hometown, but it is not as tall as here. The waist of the adult is so high, and it blooms like a blue butterfly with a palm.) You can't see the edge at a glance. This big piece of Maran! He couldn't forget it in his life. He was like in a dream.

The bullock cart walked along. Dad said: It's here! He sat up and looked at a large field of potatoes, all in bloom, pink, light purple blue, white, and could not see the edge, as if it was snowing heavily. The flower snow swayed with the wind, and he was a little dizzy. Not far away there is a row of houses with earthen walls and glass windows. This is the "potato research station" where Dad works. Potatoes - yam eggs - potatoes. Potato is the scientific name, Dad said.

Ran out of the house alone. "Mom ——!" He recognized it at a glance! Mom ran up and picked him up.

Xiao Sheng is going to live here, with his father and mother.

If Grandma had come together, how nice.

Xiao Sheng's father studied agriculture, and he has always done something else in recent years. Grandma asked him, "Why do you always transfer you around?" Dad said, "I'm a bully." "The potato research station is not willing to come, too far. Dad willing. Mom is learning to draw, a few years ago, I used to draw two dolls that could not pull the big turnip, and the sail on it could be used as a pod of a boat. She was also willing to come with her father and draw a "potato map".

Mom brought them food. Real tortillas, two large bowls of porridge. Mom said that this porridge was boiled with grass seeds. A bit like Xiaomi, smaller than Xiaomi. Green, thick, fragrant. There was also a big plate of crucian carp, so big. Dad said that crucian carp in other places rarely exceeds a pound, and the crucian carp in the "narcupine" here has a pound of two or two, and the crucian carp eats grass seeds and grows fat. When the grass seeds are ripe, the wind blows the grass seeds into the water, and the fish eat the grass seeds. Xiao Sheng ate a lot.

Dad said that there were three reasons for bringing Xiao Sheng here. First, Grandma is dead, and there is no one in my hometown. Second, Xiao Sheng should go to school, and after the summer vacation, he will go to a nearby elementary school to register. Third, it is better to eat here. There are many people in the mouth and outside the country, and it is always easier to do it. There are five acres of self-reserved land here for one person! Just plan a piece of land to grow something. Dad and Mom opened a plot of land next to the "research station" and planted yams, pumpkins. The yam blossomed, and the pumpkin grew bone. It won't be long before you can eat it.

The potato research station was quiet, and there were few people in total. It was Dad, Mom, and a few workers. Workers have homes. In the station is the Xiao Sheng family. This place, really quiet. All day long there was no sound, except for the wind blowing the ears of wheat, rustling like light rain; sometimes there were small swallows squeaking.

Dad wore a straw hat and went down to the ground every day to work with the workers, hoeing yams. Sometimes I look up information and read books. Mom got up in the morning and went to the field to pinch a large handful of yam flowers, a large handful of leaves, came back and inserted them in the bottle, looked at it intently, and drew stroke by stroke. Painted flowers are the same as real flowers! Xiao Sheng went down to the ground with his mother every day, and when he came back, his shoes and pants were covered with dew. Grandma's two new pairs of shoes had not yet been put on the feet, and Mom had locked the shoes and two bottles of butter in the cupboard.

During the day, when there was nothing to do, he would go around playing and running blindly. This place is very big, there is no shelter, how far to run, when you turn around, you can still see the row of houses at the research station, and you can't get lost. He went to the meadow to see the cows, the horses, the sheep.

He also sometimes went to the sycamore and yam field of his family. Hoe a hoe, draw half a bucket of water from the well and pour it. It's not about playing. Xiao Sheng was waiting to eat them. Their house did not have a fire, and they cooked in the brigade canteen, and the food in the canteen was getting worse and worse. There is no grass seed porridge, and there are no cornmeal cakes. Eat red sorghum cakes and drink soup made of beet leaves. It's probably going to be worse if it goes on. Xiao Sheng was a little hungry.

He learned to pick mushrooms. At first, his mother took him to pick it twice, and later, he himself will do it. It was raining, the sun was shining, the air was damp and stuffy, and the mushrooms came out. Mushrooms are very strange, and they all grow in "mushroom circles". You lower your head and look sideways, there is a circle of grass in the distance on the grass, the color is particularly dark, black and green black and green, faintly see a few white dots, that is, mushroom circles. The slip of the circle. Mushrooms grow in this circle of dark grass. There is nothing inside the circle, and there is nothing outside the circle. The mushroom circle is fixed. Long and long. Where there are mushroom circles, the villagers know.

There was a mushroom circle that went crazy. It kept growing mushrooms, whirring long, growing vigorously for three days and three nights, as if it were a ghost, and it looked afraid of people. Seven or eight nearby families came to collect, threaded up, and hung under the eaves. Every family has hung three or four strings, quite old three or four strings. The villagers said that there would be no more mushrooms in this circle, and it would die. Xiao Sheng also picked up some more. He was so excited that his heart was pounding. "Good guys! Boy! so much! so much! "He got rich.

Why was he so excited? Mushrooms can be eaten!

He shed tears as he threaded the mushrooms. He remembered Grandma, who was going to send her two bunches of mushrooms. He knew that Grandma was starving to death. People do not starve to death at once, but slowly starve to death.

The red sorghum cakes in the canteen are getting less and less delicious because they are mixed with bran. The beet leaf soup is also getting worse and worse, because there is no oil left. He hated this bran-dope red sorghum cake, this beet leaf soup without oil!

He still went around playing, going blind.

The outside of the brigade canteen suddenly became lively. At first, a cart of sheep bricks was pulled. He asked Dad what it was, and Dad said, "Sheep bricks." "What is a sheep brick?" "The sheep dung was pressed tightly and cut into pieces. "What's the use?" "Burn." "Can this burn?" "It's burning!" Fire is on fire. "Later there was a big stove. Later, a dozen sheep were killed. Xiao Sheng stood by and watched the sheep being slaughtered. He hadn't seen a sheep slaughter yet. Hey, not a bit of blood can't flow outside, and a sheepskin is peeled off completely!

What is this for?

Dad said that there should be a third-level cadre meeting.

"What is the third-level cadre association?"

"You'll know when you're older!"

The third-level cadres will eat with the third-level cadres.

The brigade originally had two canteens, the south canteen and the north canteen, and there was a courtyard in the middle, and a small shed was also set up in the courtyard, and two canteens could be strung back and forth on rainy days. It turned out that the "members" ate in two canteens. When the third-level cadre meeting was held, they all squeezed into the north canteen. The south canteen was vacated for the cadres of the meeting.

The third-level cadre meeting lasted for three days and ate three days of food. At noon on the first day, the lamb mushrooms were dipped in the noodles. The next day stewed rice. On the third day, butter flapjacks. Dinner was so-so.

"Members" and "cadres" eat at the same time. The members are in the north canteen and the cadres are in the south canteen. The north canteen is still red sorghum cakes, beet leaf soup. The people in the north canteen smelled the aroma wafting from the south canteen and said, "The lamb mushroom is dipped in the noodles, so fragrant and fragrant!" "Stewed meat and rice, so fragrant and fragrant!" "Butter flapjacks, so fragrant!"

Xiao Sheng went to eat every day and also smelled the aroma of the South Canteen. Lamb, rice, he is not rare: he has seen it, he has eaten it. He hadn't even smelled the butter flapjacks. It's incense, smelling this fragrance, I really want to eat it.

Coming home, eating red sorghum cakes, he asked his father, "Why do they eat butter flapjacks?" ”

"They have a meeting."

"Why eat butter flapjacks in a meeting?"

"They're cadres."

"Why do cadres eat butter flapjacks?"

"Oops! You're asking too much! Eat your red sorghum cakes! ”

Xiao Sheng's mother, who was swallowing the red cake, suddenly stood up, poured out a little white noodle in the jar, took out a bottle of butter from the cabinet that Grandma had not moved, opened the bottle cap, dug a large piece, grabbed a handful of white sugar, mixed it with a point, and rolled out two butter hair cakes. I grabbed a handful of wheat straw and stuffed it into the stove and burned it. Butter flapjacks have the same aroma as in the South Cafeteria. Mom put the butter flapjack in front of Xiao Sheng and said:

"Eat, son, don't ask."

Xiao Sheng ate two bites, it was delicious. He suddenly opened his mouth and cried bitterly, shouting, "Grandma! ”

Mom's eyes were filled with tears.

Dad said, "Don't cry, eat." ”

Xiao Sheng shed a string of tears while eating butter flapjacks. His tears flowed into his mouth. Butter flapjacks are sweet and tears are salty.

(This article is excerpted from "Meat Eaters Don't Despise")

Especially recommended

▼