In the past few days of Mother's Day, there has been a lot of disturbance on the Internet.
No one expected that the "Blue Moon" brand that had been with us for a long time would be scolded miserably.
The reason is that the brand launched an elevator advertisement, which may have been intended to express that her mother is usually too tired to wash clothes, so she gave her a bottle of laundry detergent with higher technology ingredients on Mother's Day.
"Make mother's laundry easier, more labor-saving, and more worry-free" to reflect the children's thoughtfulness and filial piety.
But as soon as the advertisement came out, the poster emphasized that "laundry detergent is for mothers", and even the slogan "Mom, you use it first" was extremely uncomfortable.
So one stone stirred up a thousand waves.
Netizens didn't buy it, and complained that "Blue Moon" subconsciously tied her mother to washing clothes and labeled the female role.
Regardless of whether the advertising slogan is appropriate or not, after looking at the whole incident, I noticed two hidden truths behind it, and questions that we need to ponder.
On the one hand, at the moment when women's consciousness is gradually awakening, the role of mother is finally seen by everyone;
On the other hand, the advertising slogan that seems to disrespect women reveals the cruel truth in the family:
In real life, the clothes are indeed washed by the mother.
Seeing these comments, there are also many people who are silent alone and fall into deep thought.
Because in their impression, their mother's life seems to be only firewood, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and tea.
Every day is either taking care of the children or doing housework, so when it comes to holidays, I can't even think of what gifts my mother likes.
Brushing through the circle of friends is nothing more than a ritual like completing the task: sending a red envelope, buying a bouquet of flowers, sending a string of pearls, and saying "I love you".
The next day, Mom was still back to her neglected, busy figure in the kitchen.
Only those who have experienced it know that in fact, what my mother wants is not how delicate and expensive the gift is, and she doesn't want to be an "omnipotent superman".
Instead, I can be seen and understood by my husband and children, and I really care about it.
Mom is Superman, is it really a compliment?
There used to be such a job posting on the Internet.
Basic work:
Wake up early to make breakfast and serve her husband to go out, and pack up the children's toys;
Prepare lunch, wash and dry clothes, and pick up the children from school;
Prepare dinner, tutor with homework, put away clothes and tidy up the room until late at night......
Job Requirements:
Need to be on call 24 hours a day, standing most of the time;
Understand that communication, finance, medicine and even more......
Sometimes you have to stay up late, you don't have a holiday, and you have to be prepared to give up your life......
According to the annual working hours, the annual salary of this job is at least 180,000 yuan.
But since the position is "mother", there is not a penny of salary, and there are no benefits.
In particular, the mother of the newborn is full of every hour from 6 a.m. to 1 a.m. the next day, and she has to endure the pain of breastfeeding, and she is tossed by the child until she can't sleep.
And the husband fell asleep because he "had to go to work during the day......
Stay-at-home mom daily schedule ↓
There is a very touching line in the Korean drama "Please Answer 1988":
"I heard that God can't be everywhere, so I created Mom."
Behind the praise and praise of mother's love, there is a naked question:
Why does a weak mom need to be superhuman?
As debater Zhan Qingyun said, "Mom is Superman" is not a compliment, but an emphasis on and deification of the instinct of maternal love.
When "Superman" becomes a mother's instinct, it becomes a set of social standards to demand all mothers, and it naturally ignores her efforts and sacrifices.
Once you don't do it well, everyone will condemn you with this set of standards.
Whether it is a film and television drama or in real life, we can often hear such words:
You have nothing to do at home every day, why can't you even take a child!
Do some housework crookedly, I'm so tired from work every day, can you understand me?
What do you have to be tired of, isn't it just to rest at home with the children?
The work that can't be done, the heart that can't be finished, and the "Mom, Mom, Mom" in my ears keeps coming!
365 days a year, every day is Labor Day, which is "what a mother should do" in the eyes of everyone.
I've seen such a passage:
"This era is very demanding of women, and if you choose to be a professional woman, some people will say that you are a bad mother who cares about your family;
If you choose to become a stay-at-home mother, some people will say that it is a woman's duty to have children, which is not a career. ”
"Mom is Superman" is actually Mom's shackles.
In order to become a qualified mother, each of them gave more energy and strength than their limits, and swallowed a belly of tears.
What Mom really wants
It is a burden that is put into action
"It's weird, my parents are very affectionate, but I've never seen my dad do housework."
Netizen @小七七 posted a post on the Internet.
She said that from childhood to adulthood, the picture of their home is always the mother who is busy in the kitchen, and the father who is lying on the sofa.
Also when I got home from work, my mother hurried to cook before I could put down my bag, and my father lay down on the sofa and fell asleep.
After the meal, my father threw away the dishes and chopsticks after eating and began to watch the TV.
And my mother began to wash dishes and wipe the table, mop the floor, wash clothes, and tutor my siblings with homework, so busy that she couldn't stop.
Even on Mother's Day, my mother worked alone in the kitchen for half a day, cooking a table of meals for the whole family.
After the meal, Dad was called to wash the dishes, and he had to ask for credit and say:
"Today is your holiday, I'll help you wash the dishes!"
In the comment area below, many netizens left messages saying:
"My dad also likes to say 'help', is the bowl used by my mother alone?"
"Isn't it the shared responsibility of husband and wife to do housework?"
"This sentence sounds very good, but in fact, it is not the same as treating the wife as a nanny, thinking that the housework should be done by the wife."
It's embarrassing.
After all, this kind of "family" where the father relies on his mouth and the mother relies on his hands to support him is simply too common.
In this regard, director Ang Lee's approach is worth learning from many husbands.
He worked as a family cook at home for 6 years before he became famous, and he knows his wife's hard work.
To this day, he still does the housework of grocery shopping and cooking.
He said:
"Just because I'm a gentleman doesn't mean that I can naturally be respected by them.
You still have to earn their respect every day, you have to meet a standard.
This is one of the reasons why I don't slack off. ”
When a wife becomes a mother, you should also take on the responsibilities of a father and a husband.
What gifts, what sweet words, are not worth the sharing of practical actions.
And life is trivial, and housework is the most unbearable of the trivial.
Please don't live up to this love and expectation, and don't kidnap this relationship in the name of "helping".
What Mom really wants
It was her dedication that was seen by her family
Many people's impression of their mothers is basically that they are short-tempered and full of thorns.
But no woman is born angry, most of them have accumulated too many grievances and sadness.
In the variety show, a stay-at-home mother accompanies her children to do handicrafts, and when her father comes home from work, her mother scatters fire like gunpowder.
Dad felt inexplicable, and the husband and wife accused each other and quarreled.
Under the persuasion of the childcare teacher, they each revealed their hearts: their mother felt that no one saw their hard work and dedication, and they were very aggrieved.
Only then did Dad understand where Mom's anger came from, and immediately apologized and said:
"It's really hard for a mother to take care of the housework and the children alone."
As soon as these words came out, my mother's heart softened instantly, and the two of them reconciled as before, and each other's hearts became closer.
No matter how much you do it, even the closest people can't see it and don't understand it.
This is like a thorn in my mother's heart, always in pain, how can I feel joy and happiness?
Mother is a mirror, and she will give her whatever her family gives her.
If mom is pampered and pampered by dad and children, then her appearance must be gentle and sparkling.
I think of a child from my cousin's family.
Their family runs a restaurant, and her husband goes out to work all year round, and she is often so busy that she can't take care of three meals.
But every time I go to her house, I can always see that the child is busy with housework, and takes the initiative to cook and stir-fry when he arrives at the meal, and he is too diligent to do it.
On weekends, he would go to his mother's shop to serve food and wash dishes, and in the summer, he would take the initiative to go to the street to solicit customers.
Ask him:
"Don't you have to study, don't you get tired and do so much work?"
He always smiled embarrassedly and said:
"My mother is very hard, and she has an old knee problem, so I have to share more."
Every time I heard this, the tiredness on my cousin's face was eliminated a lot.
In her words, her son knows how to understand his mother's dedication, and it is worth it no matter how tired she is.
You see, moms are very "silly" and easily satisfied.
Before she became a mother, she was also a beauty-loving girl and her parents' baby.
And with a family, no matter how hard she worked and how difficult she was, she had no regrets, and spent her youth and life on her family.
She "sacrificed" so much not for anything else, precisely because she loved this home.
As long as the family is happy, she has nothing else to ask for.
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Behind the word "mom", it often means compromise, dedication and selflessness.
No one knows their grievances; No one can empathize with their fatigue; They are accustomed to giving, but they never ask or take.
Therefore, Mother's Day is the Thanksgiving Day of the Chinese.
Today, you might as well take practical actions to offer your gratitude and companionship, and learn to reflect all the time.
I hope that fathers will sincerely feel their mother's dedication and take the initiative to undertake family work;
I hope that the children can understand their mothers, feel their mother's strong love, and often go home to see them.