Last night, my 64-year-old wife, Lao Zhao, finally ended his long battle with cancer and closed his eyes. The family was crying, and the children saw him off, but I felt an indescribable relief.
My wife's illness has tormented us for two whole years, and the days when his life is worse than death have also become a heavy burden on my heart. Now that he is quietly asleep, it is also a relief.
However, I held the will in my hand, and I had mixed feelings in my heart. The will said that he wanted to leave all his possessions to his eldest grandson, which made me feel overwhelmed.
I was standing in my bedroom, surrounded by bits and pieces of my wife's life. On the wall is a wedding photo we took last year, and how big we were smiling back then.
On the table next to the bed, there are still his medicine bottles and hospital medical records, and every page records his illness and our helplessness.
"Mom, are you okay?" my daughter Xiaomei's voice interrupted my musings.
I turned around and looked at her red and swollen eyes, and felt a sour feeling in my heart: "I'm fine, Xiaomei, you don't have to worry." ”
"However, Dad's will ......" Xiaomei stopped talking.
I sighed, I knew what she was worried about. My wife's will is undoubtedly a ticking time bomb for our family. I stroked the piece of paper, which seemed light, but it became a boulder that weighed on my heart, leaving me breathless.
"Xiaomei, don't worry, I'll take care of it. I comforted her, even though I wasn't sure what to do.
Late at night, my children had dispersed, and I sat alone on the edge of my wife's bed, tears streaming silently.
I think of the ups and downs we have gone through together, those difficult years, and those warm memories. Wife, why did you leave like this, leaving me alone to face all this.
I picked up the will, and the handwriting on it was already a little blurry. My wife's handwriting is very familiar to me, and every stroke reveals his firmness and persistence. This time, however, his decision left me deeply entangled.
My name is Lin Lili, I am 62 years old and I was born in 1962 in a small mountain village in Jiangxi Province. Due to my family's poor conditions, I didn't read much, and I stopped studying after graduating from elementary school.
In 1985, at the age of 23, I met my wife through the introduction of my aunt, and soon we became husband and wife and began to live together.
Our life is not rich, but my wife and I love each other, and although life is hard, we are also happy. In 1988, we welcomed the birth of our daughter, and three years later, our son also fell to the ground.
In order to raise our two children, we saved money and suffered a lot. I remember one time, in order to make money for the children's tuition, my wife even secretly went to sell blood, and I was so distressed that I burst into tears when I learned about it.
As our children grew up, they were all very competitive, and they were admitted to university one after another, and my wife and I felt extremely proud and grateful. However, before we could catch our breath, our son's marriage became a big stone in our hearts.
In our place, the bride price money has always been a heavy burden, and the son's two loves have failed because of the bride price, and the woman's family is a large amount of money, which is undoubtedly an astronomical amount for a family like ours.
In 2010, my son was 29 years old, but he still hadn't married a wife, and his marriage almost became my heart disease. At this moment, after being introduced, my son met a girl.
The girl is an only child, her family conditions are good, and she also has a good impression of her son. At a family dinner, the girl's parents made a condition that if they got married, they would not want a bride price, but that their future children should take their mother's surname.
My wife and I looked at each other, which was undoubtedly a huge challenge for us at the time.
One night, the atmosphere at home was unusually tense. The wife sat on the old wooden chair, her brows furrowed, and the dry tobacco pouch in her hand emitted wisps of green smoke. I stood in front of him, my heart full of anxiety and dissatisfaction.
"Lao Zhao, you have something to say, what kind of dowry money should we take? Do you really want your son to beat a bachelor?" There was a tremor in my voice, but more anger and helplessness.
The wife raised her head, a trace of guilt flashed in her eyes, but it was quickly replaced by stubbornness: "Lili, you don't understand, this is the rule of our Zhao family, and the child must follow his father's surname." ”
"Rules, can rules be eaten? You're joking with your son's happiness!" I became emotional, and my voice raised a lot.
My wife choked on my words, and he opened his mouth, but nothing came out. I continued: "You always talk about the rules of the Zhao family, but have you ever thought that your son's happiness is the most important thing? Do you want your son to live under your rules for the rest of his life?"
My wife fell silent, his eyes began to flicker, and I knew that my words touched his heart. I took a deep breath and continued to persuade: "Old Zhao, we can't be so selfish. The happiness of his son is more important than anything else. We've worked so hard to raise him, and now it's time for him to pursue his own happiness. ”
There was a look of struggle on my wife's face, and I knew that there was a fierce struggle going on inside him. After a long while, he finally spoke: "Lili, you're right, we can't be so selfish. The happiness of the son is the most important thing. ”
Hearing my wife's words, a big stone in my heart finally landed. I know that my wife's decision is not easy, but for the sake of his son, he is willing to let go of his stubbornness and rules. At that moment, I felt more relaxed and relieved than I had ever been.
We reached a compromise agreement with our in-laws: the younger couple got married and had two children, the eldest with my son's surname, and the second with the woman's surname.
In 2013, his daughter-in-law gave birth to his eldest grandson, and his wife named him Zhao Tianci, which means that this is a gift from God to our Zhao family.
I was busy before and after, serving the confinement and helping to take care of the children, although it was hard, but my heart was sweet. My wife is also very fond of this eldest grandson, and every time I see him, I will have a rare smile on my face.
However, the birth of a little grandson in 2017 made the atmosphere at home delicate. The youngest grandson took the surname of his father-in-law, and his wife has always been suspicious of this.
At that time, my mother-in-law had not yet retired and could not take care of the confinement child, so she asked me for help. My wife was very unhappy about this, he felt that we had no such obligation, and even complained in private: "It's not the blood of our Zhao family, why should we take care of it?"
With the passage of time, the two children grew up and were very close to us, but the partiality of the wife made the younger grandson feel indifferent and the eldest grandson confused. My son came to me and said worriedly, "Mom, Dad, this will hurt the brotherhood of the two children." ”
I listened to my son's words, and my heart was mixed. I know I can't be silent anymore. I found my wife and said to him earnestly: "Lao Zhao, the children are our hearts, and if you are so eccentric, it will make the children feel estranged." ”
When my wife heard my words, her face sank, and she retorted: "Where am I partial? God's gift is the bloodline of our Zhao family, so naturally we have to love it." ”
I took a deep breath, tried to calm my emotions, and then said, "Lao Zhao, blood is important, but the happiness and brotherhood of the children are even more important. By doing this, you not only hurt your little grandson, but also made Tianci feel confused. They are all our grandchildren and all deserve equal love. ”
My wife listened to me and fell silent. I know that my words touched his heart. But I also know that it won't happen overnight to change his mindset. I continued to persuade and even argue with him, just so that the children could grow up in a fair environment.
After a heated argument, the wife finally realized that she was biased. He began to try to accept his little grandson, to care for him, to love him. Although the process was not easy, I was extremely relieved to see the change in my wife.
2021 has been a mixed year for our small family. Happily, our family's two old houses located at the junction of urban and rural areas were demolished, and my wife and I chose two houses and a large amount of compensation.
Worryingly, at the end of the year, my wife was diagnosed with terminal cancer. This news was like a bolt from the blue, making waves in our otherwise peaceful life.
Faced with my wife's condition, I tried every means to treat him. But my wife firmly disagreed, and he was unwilling to throw our hard-earned wealth into the hospital like this. He chose conservative treatment, and I, I can only respect his decision.
Before my wife died, he took my hand and mentioned the will. His wife's eyes were full of helplessness and persistence, and he said, "Lili, I am also forced to do so." Anyway, I only think that the one with my surname is my grandson, and he is eligible for the property of the old Zhao family. Those with the surname of the daughter-in-law are not eligible. You're going to do what I mean. ”
My wife's words made me feel more pressure than ever before. I knew it was going to be a difficult decision, and if it didn't get it right, it would have to turn the family upside down.
After my wife died, my daughter came to me and I told her about it. After hearing this, my daughter was silent for a while, and then said to me seriously: "Mom, I think Dad is unreasonable in doing this. ”
I looked at my daughter and waited for her to continue. The daughter clearly listed three reasons: "First of all, we didn't have the ability to marry a wife for our younger brother in the first place, and it is already very good that my brother-in-law is willing to get married." If it weren't for her, we wouldn't know when Ma Yue in the Year of the Monkey would allow my younger brother to marry a daughter-in-law, let alone hold a grandson. Besides, the two children are brothers, which is a blessing for our family. If we do, we will ruin this home. Third, the palms and backs of the hands are full of meat! The brother and daughter-in-law must love both children. Can she not be angry if you treat her little son like this? If she blames you for this, you don't know what to do when you're old. ”
My daughter's words made me think deeply. I know that my wife's decision was made out of consideration for the family's bloodline, but my daughter's words are not unreasonable. I can't let my wife be stubborn and let this family fall apart.
After a fierce battle of ideas, I made my decision. I decided to amend my wife's will and not distribute the property for the time being.
I'm going to wait until my two grandchildren are older and then divide the property equally among them. I believe that this is the best respect for my wife and the best protection for this family.
I told my son and daughter-in-law about this decision, and they were both understanding and supportive. I know that this decision may cause some controversy, but I believe that nothing is impossible as long as we are united as a family.