Pay attention to the official account, the compass in the world, to be able to read the text "Change your fate, count on winning the sky and half a son, it is better to be a woman in four moves"
Recently, a Jiangxi girl and a foreign girl have made a big deal about the bride price, and many male readers have asked me to comment on it.
On the one hand, this Jiangxi girl asked for a bride price, and on the other hand, she emphasized the character of an independent girl, and was seen by a foreign girl, she didn't understand why independent women wanted a bride price?
Since it is independence, shouldn't it be that no one depends on anyone?
This topic may as well be expanded today.
First of all, I want to correct a misunderstanding, foreign girls don't want a bride price, it's not the story of the Seven Fairies marrying Dong Yong.
As long as the other party is filial, Bai Fumei will marry a poor guy, which comes more from the agrarian society.
In fact, many men in the agrarian society are singles for life, in order to anticipate management, you need to make up myths, you maintain filial piety, quietly wait for the seven fairies, wait and wait to get old, old and old, you can't make trouble, and the society will be stable.
This is the distance between fairy tales and reality.
So how do we understand a white girl, I'll give you an example of a former friend's marriage, so you can feel it up close.
This friend of mine is not a colleague, he is a R&D personnel of a top foreign company, and their group was a strategic partner of our company, and he and I have had many technical cooperation.
After finishing his undergraduate studies at a top university in China, he went to the world's top universities to continue his studies, and then he met a white girl.
The two fell in love, got married, and the girl was also very interesting, and accompanied him back to China and worked for the same company in China.
But three years later, because of cultural differences, the marriage broke up and broke up.
First of all, we must realize that the economic base determines the superstructure, and in developed regions such as Europe and the United States, which have been divided into classes for many years and have very good welfare, people are divided into two circles.
Except for a few rich celebrities, most ordinary people belong to a circle.
All these ordinary people, everyone's family background is very different, which is the economic reason why their girls are not interested in picking a family background, especially in the high-welfare Nordics.
Because their income structure is not pushpin-shaped, you can't pick out anything, the hard-working ones are nothing more than paying more taxes, and the lazy ones are just receiving more handouts, and in the end they are all like that.
In other words, it's not that they don't ask for it, but they don't ask for it.
If their income is also pin-shaped, if social class 369 is very open to each other, then their minds will also change.
This is the first point, the economic basis for the birth of culture.
The second point is that in the economic field, everyone is almost the same, and there is no way to ask for it, so the girls are not not asking for it, but asking for diversification.
For example, your friend of mine, who divorced because he was out of shape.
This is difficult to understand in China, the requirements for men in China are not so diverse, you have a good job, you earn money, you take care of your family, you are not cheating, this is a good man.
Isn't it normal for a man to get rich after getting married? I've seen a lot of overtime farmers gradually getting fat, with a circle of meat around their waists, and I haven't heard of anyone getting divorced because of this.
That young man's figure is probably about the same as Gao Xiaosong, his good-looking skin is the same, and his interesting soul is more than 200 catties.
Anyway, when I met him, he was like that, maybe he was handsome before he got married, but I haven't seen it.
Then his daughter-in-law empathized and said goodbye, and then divorced.
This matter is very awkward from the perspective of the Orientals, in the words of Zhu Bajie, the dustpan of the thick willow and the bucket of the thin willow, who in the world thinks men are ugly.
His wife, Pan Jinlian, what is there to say.
But he told us that he didn't understand it this way, he had been in love with a white girl for five years, married for three years, and even the two sides fought and beat each other during the marriage, and he always lost the fight.
Later he understood a problem, which was a cultural divide.
You can't use the traditional culture of the Oriental people to divide people into men and women, thinking that men should be outside, women should provide emotional value, and the other party is a white person, she doesn't understand you.
In the value of the other party, you are a person, she is a person, she fell in love with you because of 12345, if 12345 is gone now, only 123 is left, she may empathize with other lovers.
This difference is somewhat similar to that of the universities on both sides.
Our colleges and universities are strict in and wide out, and they are wide in and strict out.
We think it is very prudent to enter into marriage, especially for girls, once divorced, the sky is falling.
So before we get married, we are working very hard to show ourselves, especially boys, who will try to show their perfection and make up all kinds of advantages, 12345.
So once you enter the marriage, there is no big problem, for example, whether you have to keep in shape, whether you have to make a surprise from time to time, I don't think it's important, live a life.
That is to say, women in the East default that men are declining after entering marriage, from 12345, slowly decreasing to 123, or even 1.
But that white girl thinks that you were all 12345 before marriage, so you must not be 1234567....... after marriage
See the gap in expectations brought about by cultural differences?
This is what he shared with us about his marriage to a white girl.
Of course, this young man married a domestic girl soon after, and his ex-wife also left China, so this has nothing to do with our topic today.
I use this story as an introduction to tell readers, especially male readers, a very important fact.
That girl may not want a bride price, but a person can't want nothing.
For example, as men, we hope that we will be like Xu Xian, meet a fair-skinned, beautiful and long-legged Bai Suzhen, and have money, and can also open a pharmacy for ourselves, provide emotional value, and be a bird to maintain our male dignity.
Unless you saved the world 1,700 years ago.
You know what I mean? There is no such thing as a free lunch, and there is no such thing as gratuitous feelings.
If you are not handsome, your mouth is not sweet, and your pockets are clean, but you want to have a girl with outstanding appearance, a bumpy body, and a gentle and considerate girl, who will constantly provide you with emotional value.
Have you ever thought that you respect humanity, do you respect interests?
You don't have to pay for this kind of thing, but you can't pay nothing, do you understand what I said?
When I was in graduate school, I had a roommate who was not handsome, just an ordinary one, but he had a new girlfriend almost every month.
Moreover, everyone lives together, and in such a short time, those who meet within a month can live together.
What's more, every time, the rent is paid by the other party, that is, he has been in graduate school for three years, and all of them live off-campus in a house rented by his girlfriend.
I've been in the company for a long time as a second-year intern, and I've seen at least a dozen of his girlfriends.
What did he do it? Lick.
He is a person who is very capable of providing emotional value to others.
After graduating, he broke up with all his girlfriends and went to a famous big factory to do sales in Africa.
The guy is very popular in the sales world in Africa, and he is known as the electric motor and time management master of the big technology company.
He is a person, don't talk about equalizing girls, even if he breaks through the restrictions of gender and equalizes boys, I believe he can do it.
Who said that the sister must spend money? Spend money to get it, that is called procurement, let the other party be willing to pay money, this is called sales.
He did it.
During his studies, he showed the characteristics of a first-class salesman, so he quickly put his talents to good use, and was sent to the big stage in Africa where he could best display his talents.
Value is diverse, bride price is one, emotional value is also one.
There are three things to say, different people say it, and it gives people different feelings, some people just make people uninterested, and some people just make people feel like a spring breeze.
Just like Cheng Pu said in the Romance of the Three Kingdoms, getting along with Zhou Yu is like drinking mellow mash, and you don't feel drunk.
You see that in the Yongzheng Dynasty, when the eighth elder brother saw the imperial doctor, he knew that he liked to raise birds in private, and the silver ticket did not say that the master would reward you for buying medicine, but said that he would buy two birds to play.
The man was very happy when he heard it, the eighth master even knew about his hobby, and he really worked hard.
When his fourth brother came back from disaster relief, he didn't congratulate the other party on going further to become the king of the county, but said that the other party had great merits.
Because the eighth child knows that the fourth child is keen on Buddhism, you use this word, people are very comfortable listening to it, and they think you understand me.
Even the eunuch Li Dequan next to Kangxi, he is not called father-in-law, what is his name? He is called master, Master Li.
What man likes to be reminded that he is his father-in-law all the time? You see, the eighth master has even noticed this.
Some people say, isn't this just licking?
yes, it's licking, the question is, how good are you licking?
Some people don't even have the consciousness of licking, some people lick at a very high cost, some people don't spend a dime, and people lick just right.
There are even some people, like Cheng Pu said, whose licking skills make you intoxicated, make you not want to leave, and make the principle of same-sex repulsion no longer work.
In this world, there is no such thing as having to be in the relationship between the sexes.
Boys don't have to find a daughter-in-law, and girls don't have to find a husband, it's good to live alone.
However, if you have to find a daughter-in-law yourself, what state are you in now?
In fact, it is a state of sale, you are equivalent to a vendor selling along the street, but you are peddling.
There are no skills in sales, if there are, a total of eight words: respect for human nature, respect for interests.
You don't have to think that the other party is a woman, you have to think first, the other party is a person, how can you take a person?
If you have money, you can learn from Principal Wang, if you don't have money, you can look at my classmate in the past.
His girlfriend estimated that there would never be less than three digits today, what did he rely on? He was a poor bastard during his studies, and he really ate and drank, and I never saw him buy an order once, and it was always a rub.
The problem is that people are like the eighth elder brother, who are used to being low and small, and are more charming and moving.
Don't think that only women can provide emotional value, and women can't imagine that men are charming.
It is natural that women cook a lot of food in the world, but the top celebrity chefs are often men.
Then what do you say when you encounter someone who can't get emotional value, and you only recognize money?
There is a famous saying in the sales industry, if we beg for food, do we still think that the food is rancid?
Since you lower your profile and recognize that you are a salesman, then don't think that this girl is not good-looking for a while, and that girl does not provide emotional value.
Why don't you ask for so much?
The essence of the relationship between the sexes is the law of attraction, if you have money, or you are willing to throw money, then you will smash it, you have no money, or you are not willing to smash it if you have money, then you will cross the sea and show your powers.
Some people play the piano and make a sister, some people do a sister, and some people show their muscles.
Of course, you can also be uninterested in this, because you have seen through it, you think that this kind of is too pediatric, and if you want to conquer, you will conquer men.
Why is Song Jiang not a woman? Because compared to Yan Poxi, conquering more than 100 men is more energetic.
Then think about it, how did Song Jiang conquer those 105 men? Did he give the bride price one by one?
Pay attention to the official account, the compass in the world, to be able to read the text "Change your fate, count on winning the sky and half a son, it is better to be a woman in four moves"
