"Entrusting orphans" refers to the act of entrusting the orphans behind them to others, and generally refers to the entrustment of the throne in feudal society.
After I retired, whenever I went to visit my mother at my parents' house, my 78-year-old mother would "take care of me".
My mother made me promise that after 100 years, I would take care of my 56-year-old brother's life.
I'm Su Limin, 51 years old this year, and after I retire, I often visit my mother who lives alone and do what I can.
Although my mother lives alone, she lives in the front and back buildings with my brother, who eats three meals a day at my mother's place.
After my brother's divorce, my nephew went back to the south with my sister-in-law, and I haven't seen him for many years.
In my opinion, more than half of the reason for my brother's divorce is my mother.
After my sister-in-law finished confinement, I was afraid that my position would be replaced, so I went to work in less than four months.
My mother retired at home to help take care of her nephew, but my mother belonged to that kind of person, and she didn't do anything less, and she didn't say a word.
In our hearts as daughters-in-law, we are very grateful to our mother-in-law for helping us when we were in the most difficult time.
But my mother is, while helping to bring the baby to my sister-in-law, she is also picky about my sister-in-law's various wrongs.
Actually, my sister-in-law has done well enough, but my mother is not satisfied, and this mountain looks high and that mountain is high.
It's okay to compare with the retired old lady in the hospital, and other people's daughters-in-law buy a dress and a bracelet.
My mother nagged in front of my sister-in-law, always saying that she was miserable and couldn't meet a good daughter-in-law like others.
After a long time, my sister-in-law finally got angry and had a big fight with my mother.
My brother is still a foolish son, and he never listens to what my sister-in-law says, and he doesn't look at how my sister-in-law does it.
Just listen to what my mother said, one side of the story, my brother came home and fought with my sister-in-law.
After a long time, if my brother drinks some wine, he will still do it.
Once, I don't know why they quarreled, and my sister-in-law called the police and was hospitalized.
My sister-in-law's mother-in-law came, and without saying a word, he beat my brother up directly.
My mother also followed suit, jumping to the police to arrest my sister-in-law's mother-in-law.
My sister-in-law and nephew were picked up by her mother-in-law, and half a year later, my brother divorced my sister-in-law.
My mother often told me that my sister-in-law was bad, and I couldn't listen to it anymore.
I asked my mother what would my husband do if she was like my brother, and what would my brother do?
It was really unexpected, my mother actually said that I must have done a bad job at my in-law's house.
Either I don't listen to my mother-in-law, or I don't treat my husband well, anyway, I must have done something wrong.
The implication is that what my sister-in-law did was wrong for my mother and my brother.
Perhaps, this is why my brother has been divorced for more than ten years, and it is difficult to find a partner, right?
In the case of my brother's divorce, only my deceased father and I felt that it was not my sister-in-law's fault.
But my father and I don't have much say in our family, my mother is in charge of major matters, and the benefits of the family are my brother's.
My father was sick, and my mother said that my brother was tired from work, so she asked me to run back and forth, and even asked my wife to take a long leave of absence to take care of me in the hospital.
It is also my wife who is kind and loyal, not like my mother, and he took care of my father in the hospital during his last years.
The unwitting patient thought that my wife was my own son and my brother was the son-in-law of the family.
After my father left, my mother told us directly that all the expenses compensated by my father were my brother's, because my brother didn't have a daughter-in-law yet!
My wife told me not to fight, not to be angry with my mother, and not to talk about my brother, every family has a scripture that is difficult to read.
After my mother lived alone, she became more and more dependent on me, and always wanted me to give up my small family and stay with her all day.
Every time I came home, my mother would tell me how long it had been since my brother had eaten meat and that my brother's clothes had been worn for years.
At first, I pretended to be stupid and didn't understand, but after a long time, my mother called me directly and asked me to buy something next time.
Especially after I retired, my mother asked me to go home every week to accompany her and cook food for her and my brother.
It's not that I care about money, it's that my mother has a pension of her own, which is higher than mine, and my brother's salary is higher than that of my wife.
But my mother only asked me to give, and never gave me back, and after a long time, I also got angry.
After all, my son is about to graduate from graduate school, and he is facing a future job, and he will start a family.
My wife and I are under a lot of pressure, but my mother only has my brother in her heart, and she always wants to give him everything.
I once told my mother that I was going to find a job to earn more money and help my son buy a wedding house.
The mother said very unhappily, is it important to earn money, or is it important to be filial to her?
Sometimes, my mother told me to focus on my brother and not to think about my wife at home.
I really don't know if my mother is confused, or if she's selfish to the point of despair, and my brother is the only one in my heart.
Some time ago, my mother had a little cold, and she nagged all day that she was useless, and my brother was the most relieved.
On that day, my mother made me swear a special vow and promised me to take good care of my brother after she was 100 years old.
Seeing my mother like this, I also told my mother in a serious way that I couldn't fulfill her request, and whoever was responsible for his own life.
My mother was anxious, saying that I had no family affection, and I only had my wife and son in my eyes, and I had no siblings.
I told my mother that my brother was almost 60 years old, and he could take care of himself and didn't have to worry about him.
The Buddha says: Whoever you remember in your heart is to put pressure on whom you are and affect your fortune.
My mother said that I was an excuse, and I said that it was cause and effect, and that I could not interfere with other people's cause and effect at will.
We just need to live our own lives, and other people's lives are their own business, and human interference can only be counterproductive.
I wanted to tell my mother about the matter between my brother and my sister-in-law, but it was because she interfered too much that it ended like this.
But I didn't dare, and I could only let my mother slowly comprehend it by herself.
I am only responsible for my life, taking care of my mother, helping my son, treating each other with my wife, and living our own lives.
As for my brother's life, it was his own business, and no one could force it, change it, or give it.
As for my mother's "orphanage", I can only say that I can't do it.
Do you think I'm doing the right thing?
Author: Huagui Zen Heart
Follow my words and go into your heart. You have a story, I have tea, and we can talk about the rest of our lives together.
The pictures in the article come from the Internet.
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