In a corner of the park, Aunt Zhang and Aunt Li sat on a stone bench chatting.
Hearing Aunt Li talk about her loving life with her wife, Aunt Zhang recalled her relationship with her wife as a "roommate", and now she still sleeps in separate rooms, so she can't help but ask for advice.
After hearing this, Aunt Li smiled and said, "No matter how strong the relationship is, it has to be maintained by husband and wife." ”
Aunt Zhang blushed suddenly, no one who has menstruation anymore, how can she be so old and improper?
In life, when many people get older, they will be like Aunt Zhang, thinking that they can't live as a couple after menopause, is this really the case?
1. After menopause, can I still live a "married life" and who benefits more?
Sex education in mainland China is very introverted, influenced by traditional concepts, and many people are particularly surprised that the elderly still have sexual needs, thinking that they are "old and not serious".
But this idea is very wrong, old age sex life ≠ not serious, and there is no necessary causal relationship between whether there is a need and age, hormone levels.
According to a number of surveys in the United States, > 50% of men and >40% of women in the age group ≥ 60 years old are still sexually active. According to a study by Duke University in the United States, about 20% of seniors aged > 65 believe that having sex is better than when they were younger.
In 2018, a domestic survey of 1,000 valid questionnaires for people aged 55-61 showed that 53% of people had sex at least once a month, and 39% of the elderly could have sex three times a month.
It can be seen that whether it is at home or abroad, even if it is a postmenopausal elderly, it is a very normal thing to have a married life.
Yang Dong, deputy chief physician of the reproductive center of Chengdu Women and Children's Central Hospital, said that most elderly patients with chronic diseases should have a proper marital life under the premise of stable condition, which is beneficial to health.
1. Reduce physical symptoms
Married life is a great physical activity that can help reduce back pain, indigestion, insomnia, and neurasthenia in older people.
2. Relieve psychological stress
Geriatric psychology research believes that proper marital life can help enhance the self-esteem and self-confidence of the elderly, and is good for alleviating psychological pressure.
3. Delay aging
Good sexual function requires sex hormones to participate, such as a decrease in testosterone secretion, which will not only reduce sexual performance, but also affect male vitality, self-confidence, and even cause osteoporosis, anemia, depression, etc. Proper sexual intercourse can promote the secretion of hormones such as testosterone, which can delay the rate of aging of the body.
Therefore, whether it is an elderly man or a woman, a proper marital life can bring certain benefits to health, and there is no one who benefits more or less.
2. Why do many couples choose to sleep in separate rooms when they reach the age of 50?
I don't know if you have noticed that there are more and more middle-aged and elderly couples who don't want to sleep in the same bed in their lives, and some even choose to sleep in separate rooms, why is this?
Shi Shi, deputy chief physician of the Department of Orthopedics of the Affiliated Hospital of Yangzhou University, said that there may be three main reasons.
1. Take care of grandchildren
Couples in ordinary families, if they want to go to work normally, they must have the help of the elderly to take care of the children, and in order to facilitate the care of children, many elderly people will choose to sleep separately.
2. Fear of affecting the other party's sleep
There are also some elderly people who often snore, cough and other movements because they suffer from chronic diseases, so in order not to affect the sleep quality of the other half, they choose to sleep in separate rooms.
3. Emotional discord
Relationship problems are also one of the main reasons for the elderly to sleep in separate beds, and they may be at the point of getting tired of each other after being together for a long time, so they have to choose to sleep separately in order to avoid quarrels.
So for couples with stable relationships, is it good to sleep in separate rooms?
In fact, there is no standard answer to this question, and it is objectively believed that sleeping separately can improve the quality of sleep for both partners, but studies have shown that the results are quite the opposite. Couples generally believe that sleeping in the same bed is more comfortable and sound.
Especially for more insecure women, sleeping in the same bed can help them feel less stressed and comfortable.
For some patients with chronic diseases such as hypertension, diabetes, coronary heart disease, etc., sleeping in separate rooms may also pose health risks, especially when cardiovascular events occur, and time is of the essence. It is recommended that such people choose to sleep in adjoining rooms or in separate beds.
3. How to ensure that two people sleep better when sleeping in the same bed?
Regardless of whether the room is divided or not, as long as the relationship between the husband and wife is not negatively affected, it is not a problem. If you choose to sleep in the same bed, you can ensure the quality of sleep for the couple from the following 4 aspects.
1. Try to sync your sleep time
It is recommended that couples can synchronize their sleep time, that is, sleep together and wake up together. Studies have found that couples with good sleep synchronization are also more satisfied with their marital relationships.
2. Severe snoring can be cured
Some people with more severe snoring are advised to go to the hospital in time, which is likely to be caused by sleep apnea syndrome.
3. Create a good sleeping environment
A good sleeping environment is very important to promote sleep, and it is recommended to keep the room dimly lit, the temperature is appropriate, and the pillows and bedding are clean and tidy.
4. Avoid external stimuli before going to bed
Be careful not to exercise vigorously, drink strong tea, drink alcohol, and consume excessive liquids/foods before going to sleep, otherwise it will easily affect the normal quality of sleep. In addition, it is recommended not to play with electronic products before going to bed, otherwise it is easy to affect melatonin secretion and affect normal sleep.
As the saying goes, a hundred years of repair can be crossed in the same boat, and a thousand years of repair can be repaired to sleep together, whether you choose to sleep in the same bed or in separate beds, it is the choice of the husband and wife, and it must be built on the basis of harmony.
Resources:
[1] "Can I still have sex when I am old?Doctor: Do it right, there are at least 6 benefits to the body!", Health Times, 2019-12-08
[2] "Why do many couples sleep separately when they reach middle age?, is it good or bad?", Chinese Journal of Practical Internal Medicine, 2022-08-16
[3] "Should husband and wife sleep in one bed?" The benefit of "sleeping in separate beds", many people did not expect...".Tencent Medical Dictionary 2023-09-23
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