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There is an old saying in the mainland: "A gentleman should be cautious in what he says", which means that people must be cautious when speaking in life, and they must be cautious when speaking, otherwise they may "get into trouble from the mouth", and I don't know which sentence will offend others.
However, many retired old people, when they were young, could only be cautious in their words and deeds for the sake of face, and when they retired, they thought that they had no scruples, and they always couldn't control their mouths when they spoke, and often spoke wildly.
In fact, no matter what age you are, knowing how to be silent and less words can be smooth sailing at any time, and for the elderly, don't speak freely in your old age in order to be respected by your children and neighbors, and to enjoy your old age happily.
On the contrary, those flamboyant retired old people, they say things that should not be said when they meet people, and as a result, they get into trouble and regret it in their old age.
Therefore, after retirement, we must remember: don't say 4 words to people, so as not to get into trouble, and keep your mouth shut before you can be happy in your old age!
01. Don't show off your children's achievements
In their later years, many people live a relatively leisurely life and have nothing to do, so they will always come downstairs in the community and get together with a group of old people to chat.
However, the most talked about topic of this group of old people should be to show off their children's achievements, from a small achievement in their children's careers to income and real estate, they will always show off and satisfy their vanity.
Sister Pan's son holds a managerial position in a listed company in the provincial capital, with a monthly salary of 50,000 or 60,000 yuan, which makes Sister Pan very face-saving and always shows off in front of her neighbors.
Once, Sister Pan and several retired colleagues came to the provincial capital for a tour, and it was already evening when they arrived in the provincial capital, and the colleague proposed to let Sister Pan's son invite him to dinner. Sister Pan thought that this was a face-show thing, and immediately agreed.
Who knows, my son works overtime at night and has no time at all. But Sister Pan was stubborn, and she insisted that her son ask for leave to take everyone to dinner. There was no way, so my son could only take a leave of absence.
After arriving at the hotel, in order to show face, Sister Pan asked her old colleagues to order food casually, and her son paid the bill.
After hearing this, colleagues were not polite, and they ordered expensive dishes one after another, spending more than 5,000 yuan at the checkout.
This makes Sister Pan's son angry, although the income is high, but it is not so wasteful, the monthly mortgage alone costs 10,000 yuan, and the decoration loan and car loan are repaid.
Sister Pan realized that because of her show-off comparison, her son's financial burden increased, so she had to silently take out 5,000 yuan from her pension to her daughter-in-law, and then she didn't dare to praise her son in front of others.
Showing off the achievements of your children will only make those who are not as good as you envy and be looked at maliciously by others, and you will also be ridiculed by those who are better than you, and your heart will be full of pain.
In fact, there is no point in comparing and showing off, how the children's career is, is the result of their hard work, as parents do not need to talk about their children's achievements, otherwise it will only add trouble and pressure to their children.
02. Don't say words that sow discord and are not considered
After retirement, people have more time to rest and relax, and many people can't bear to be lonely, and will always get together with old sisters, gossip about others, and even sow discord and fiddle with right and wrong. Sowing discord is a villain's behavior, and once it is known, it will definitely become a joke for others.
Aunt Li is such a person, she is a well-known "long-tongued woman" in the community, whoever has something ugly, she will listen to it, and then take the opportunity to sow discord and make other people's chickens and dogs restless.
Once, Aunt Li learned that Sister Li and her daughter-in-law had a conflict. It turned out that Sister Li was helping to take care of her grandson at her son's house, but because her son had no ability and his salary was not high, the money every month could only be used to support the family, and she couldn't save it at all.
Sister Li can only take out her pension subsidy for the younger couple, but she can't control her stinky mouth, and always looks down on her son and daughter-in-law in various ways, and often criticizes the younger couple in public.
After a long time, the daughter-in-law broke out and insisted that her mother-in-law go back to her hometown to live, otherwise she would leave the house, and finally the son finally coaxed the daughter-in-law.
Sister Li knew that Aunt Li had a lot of ghost ideas, and hoped that she could help with advice. Aunt Li didn't think it was a big deal to see the excitement, and instigated Sister Li not to back down, if the little couple was disrespectful to her again, they would lie on the ground directly.
After listening to it, Sister Li thought that this idea was very good and secretly remembered it in her heart. Not long after, Sister Li and her daughter-in-law broke out again, she remembered Aunt Li's idea, and lay directly on the ground, not to mention that her daughter-in-law beat her, but also complained to her son.
The son was suspicious at first, but when he saw Sister Li's haggard appearance, he was distressed and slapped his daughter-in-law.
It was this slap that made the daughter-in-law leave the house directly, and she filed for divorce soon after. A series of accidents made Sister Li regret it, and she realized that she had made a big fuss and found Aunt Li to make a fuss, but even so, she couldn't save her son's marriage.
There are also some people who always like to spread rumors and make trouble, once someone has something ugly, they will deliberately exaggerate and play with right and wrong in an unconsidered background, distorting the original meaning of the matter, and bringing heavy verbal pressure to the family of the person concerned.
This kind of person will only make the people around him stay away, after all, these people love to sow discord and spread rumors, and no one knows whether it will harm them, so they can only choose to stay away from them.
03. Don't tell the outside world about family conflicts
Every family has a scripture that is difficult to read, especially between two generations, due to the differences in life habits, Xi dietary habits, and personality Xi, there will always be some small contradictions.
There are no such contradictions, but there are always some old people who think that their sons and daughters-in-law do not respect themselves, and they will tell the young couple about their disrespect to themselves and ruin the reputation of the young couple.
For example, Sister Song worked in a state-owned enterprise when she was young, and now she lives a quiet life after retirement, and is called by her son to help take care of her grandson. Sister Song happened to have this intention, and rushed to the city where her son was located to take care of her little grandson and serve her daughter-in-law's confinement.
At first, the family lived happily and harmoniously, but after a long time, conflicts came. It turned out that although Sister Song had a relatively high pension, she was diligent and thrifty all her life, and would always mop the floor with vegetable washing water, but her daughter-in-law thought that mopping the floor like this was not clean, and the two sides had many disputes.
Another time, Sister Song saw that many children in the community would sit in walkers, and she took out the money to buy one in order to help her little grandson walk. I thought that my daughter-in-law would thank her, but she threw the walker in the trash because experts do not recommend using it. This made Sister Song angry and surprised, she didn't expect her daughter-in-law to be so pedantic, so many people in the community used it, and she didn't see anyone worrying about anything.
Under the dispute between the two parties, the daughter-in-law immediately issued an eviction order to let Sister Song go back to her hometown. Sister Song wanted to leave for a long time, so she hurriedly packed her luggage and returned to her hometown.
After arriving in her hometown, Sister Song would say that her daughter-in-law was not, but the neighbors added fuel and vinegar, describing her daughter-in-law as a vicious woman, and her son was also considered unfilial.
During the Chinese New Year, his son and daughter-in-law came to their hometown, but they learned about their bad reputation from the villagers, so they turned around and left home, and never returned to their hometown after that.
Only then did Sister Song realize that she had said the wrong thing, and the ugliness of the family should not be publicized, but she took the initiative to say it and smear the little couple.
04. Don't show off your pension
For those who work in state-owned enterprises and public institutions, they can receive a considerable pension after retirement, which is enough to meet their living needs. However, there are also the general public, who did not work in the formal unit when they were young, and it is difficult for them to receive pensions, and there is a huge contrast between the two.
Lao Li was a primary school teacher before retiring, and only retired three years ago and returned to live in his rural hometown. Seeing that the life of his peers is very difficult, and many people still have to work in the farmland in their later years, and the life is very hard, Lao Li can't help but feel a sense of pride in his heart.
Every time he chats with others, he always shows off that he has a high pension, he can receive seven or eight thousand yuan a month, and he doesn't worry about food and clothing at all, even if he eats beef and mutton every day, this money can't be spent.
When the villagers heard this, they were envious, they never thought that Lao Li could receive so much money in a month, which was higher than the salary of many young people.
Watching others praise himself, Lao Li seems to have a lot of face, and he is very angry wherever he goes.
But soon, many villagers came to ask for help. Some people can't afford to pay the water and electricity bills at home, so they borrow 100 yuan from Lao Li to pay it; some people can't afford to buy Xi materials, so they borrow 50 yuan from Lao Li to help.
The amount of money was not large, and Lao Li didn't pay attention to it, and he also knew that the villagers didn't plan to pay it back.
But not long after, a poor household of the villagers knocked on the door of Lao Li's house, and he told his experience with tears in his eyes, hoping that Lao Li could borrow 2,000 yuan to save the emergency.
Lao Li relented for a while and took out 2,000 yuan to this poor household. But in the next few days, this poor household eats big fish and meat every day, and it doesn't look like "lack of money to save the emergency", Lao Li went to ask for the account, but the other party said: "Why do you have to pay back the money you borrowed with your ability?"
Since then, Lao Li no longer borrowed money from the villagers, but he didn't expect the villagers to complain that he was too stingy, so that Lao Li's reputation in the village was ruined.
Lao Li realized that it was his showing off of his pension that caused others to be jealous and jealous, and also caused a lot of trouble for himself. Later, he went to live with his son in the city.
It can be seen that language is an art, a kind word can make people warm, but malicious words can put themselves and their families in prison. Therefore, after retirement, people must live a low-key life, don't tell their own ugly things, don't show off their children's achievements and their pensions, and don't go around sowing discord and watching people's jokes.
If you want to make your old age happier and more joyful, you must be cautious in your words and deeds to avoid unnecessary conflicts and troubles, what do you think?