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People often say that marriage is the graveyard of love, but others say that marriage is an art and a practice. Wenger Julie once said: "Even the happiest marriage will have 200 thoughts of divorce and 50 thoughts of strangling each other in a lifetime." Perhaps a little exaggerated, but it points to the complexity of marriage, as well as the setbacks and trials involved. From acquaintance to love, from staying together to walking hand in hand into the future, the emotional path between husband and wife is full of twists and turns. Only by understanding each other can you unlock the password of marriage.
First, understand each other's emotional needs
There is a middle-aged couple who have walked hand in hand for more than 20 years of marriage. The husband runs a successful company, while the wife is an elementary school teacher. The material life is rich, however, their feelings have always been decadent. The root cause of the contradiction is that the husband is immersed in the sea of career and alienates his wife. For a wife, marriage seems to be a "widowed" state, she longs for the company of her husband, but the husband is always "too busy". The wife felt neglected and gradually planted the seeds of resentment and conflict. She even began to wonder if her husband still loved her.
Recently, the couple participated in a husband and wife reality show. In the show, through various emotional tests and in-depth communication, they finally made the husband understand the emotional needs of his wife, and also recognized his own problems. He lamented from the bottom of his heart: "I used to think that money and material things were enough to show my love, but I ignored her emotional needs. Now I understand. After his wife forgave and readmitted him, their marital relationship began to become warm and affectionate.
Everyone has emotional needs and a desire to be understood, cared for, and cherished. In the relationship between husband and wife, if you can deeply understand each other's needs and actively meet each other's emotional desires, you can enhance the depth of the relationship and strengthen the solid foundation of the marriage.
Second, understand each other's living habits
There is also a young couple, whose marriage has not yet come out of the initial heat, but often quarrels over some small trivial matters. They disagree on the little things in life, such as toothpaste squeezing and food taste. The husband used to squeeze from the middle of the toothpaste, while the wife insisted on squeezing from the end; The husband loves spicy food, but the wife is afraid of spicy food. These seemingly trivial things became the trigger for constant quarrels.
Then, they happened to see a couple's life skills lecture on TV. In the lecture, the instructor emphasized the importance of respecting each other's living habits and advised couples not to impose their preferences on their spouses. The couple followed the advice of the mentor and began to try to understand and accept each other's living habits. They also learned to solve problems in a rational way when disagreements arise. Miraculously, the quarrels gradually decreased, and their marital relationship gradually became harmonious.
Everyone has their own habits and ways of behaving. Between husband and wife, if you can understand and tolerate each other's living habits and tolerate each other's small problems, you can reduce unnecessary quarrels and make the marriage more happy and harmonious.
Third, understand the personality characteristics of the other party
In one book, I read the story of a young couple. The wife is impatient and prone to anger, while the husband is gentle and calm. Soon after marriage, they had frequent disputes due to some trivial matters. The husband thinks that the wife has a bad temper, while the wife feels that the husband is too cold and does not do one thing and does nothing. They fall into a vicious circle, and the contradictions between the husband and wife deepen.
To improve their marriage, they sought the help of a psychologist. Psychologists advise them to understand each other's personality traits and learn reasonable communication styles. For example, a wife needs to control her emotions, while a husband needs to learn to express his emotions and concerns. Under the guidance of psychologists, they gradually learned how to communicate with each other and how to negotiate and solve problems. Their marital relationship improved and gradually became more harmonious.
Each person has their own unique personality traits that influence their behavior and attitude. Between husband and wife, if they can understand each other's personality characteristics and understand each other's way of doing things, they can communicate and negotiate more effectively and face problems together.
Marriage is an evolving tango, and two people need to move forward together. No matter what kind of storm they encounter, I hope that the husband and wife can spend their lives together. The key to a good marriage is whether you really understand each other's emotional needs, living habits and personality characteristics.
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